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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask 16yo to take his baby brother swimming? How strict are pools?

223 replies

Swimmin · 09/03/2026 17:26

Hi everyone, baby is only 8 weeks so a while yet but just thinking of the future.

If someone were to take him swimming he needs supervised by a person 16+ how strict are they on that? Do they ask to see ID? Some under 16s look older than their age…

i have 16, 14, 10 and 5 year old also. younger 2 need me

would it be U to give money to my 16 to take him to the baby pool? but i’d say my 16 year old looks younger than his age

OP posts:
Parky04 · 09/03/2026 17:29

Very unreasonable asking a 16 year old to be responsible for a baby around water.

istolethetalisker · 09/03/2026 17:30

YABVVU. A child in a swimming pool is too much responsibility for a teenager, even a responsible one. It's a completely different level of attention required to an evening's babysitting. They can drown so so quickly. It's not fair to your eldest.

Assistledoggo · 09/03/2026 17:30

I wouldn’t ask a 16 year old to do this. Not around water.

faerylights · 09/03/2026 17:30

I know someone will be along to say that they were a parent at 16, but I really wouldn't trust a 16 year old kid to have sole responsibility for a child in the water.

GreenGodiva · 09/03/2026 17:31

Jesus Christ. No, you take your own baby swimming. Stop farming out to your other children, it’s bloody awful. I know cos my sister in 16 years younger than me. I didn’t want money for looking after her, I wanted to go out with my mates and not be on childcare duty.

Assistledoggo · 09/03/2026 17:32

Coul the 16 mind the 10 and 5? And you go swimming with the baby?

Moshalot · 09/03/2026 17:32

Not even the most responsible teenager, purely because it would tear your family apart if something happened. Your baby does not NEED to go swimming.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 09/03/2026 17:33

FFS of course you don’t ask a teenager to take your baby swimming! Can you imagine if something went wrong?

This really is something for you as a parent to do. And why would you want your baby to be at the pool so desperately that you wanted them to go without you there?

I can understand if you wanted to use the 16 yo to put the family as a whole in ratio with you there in overall charge. But please don’t make him responsible for a baby in water - it’s quite nerve wracking for parents the first time!

The age limit will be 16 in case of very young parents wanting to take their babies, I imagine.

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 09/03/2026 17:34

i don't know. My 18 year old took DS swimming when he was 2 and still does now but I'm not sure I'd have been happy if either of them had been younger.
Are you planning to go and you and 16 year old be responsible for 1 of the younger children each? In that case it would be fine.

Justthethingsthatyoudointhisgarden · 09/03/2026 17:34

Are you taking the piss?

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 09/03/2026 17:35

No way. I’m surprise you’re even asking this here. When I’ve taken my nephew who was one swimming his mum was with us, so we both took him.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 09/03/2026 17:37

If you are asking your 16 year old to help with the baby while you are also on the pool with your other kids at the same time then that might be ok as you can watch them. Expecting a 16 year old to be responsible for someone else’s baby in a pool without you there would be very irresponsible for several reasons.

Girasoli · 09/03/2026 17:38

I would take the baby swimming while the 10 and 5 year olds are at school, or are you thinking more about holidays?

Original poster
Swimmin · 09/03/2026 17:38

It's 1 parent 2 children for under 8s but even though my 10 year old is 10 he's suspected ASD and there's no way I could have the younger 3.

I would like to take the children swimming when it's a bit warmee so baby will be 4+ months

Even if he took 5yo I'm not sure he'd be allowed because even tho he's 16 he looks younger than his age so in asking how they do it and know that there 16 or over

OP posts:
Original poster
Swimmin · 09/03/2026 17:39

Justthethingsthatyoudointhisgarden · 09/03/2026 17:34

Are you taking the piss?

Why would I be?

OP posts:
DaisyChain505 · 09/03/2026 17:39

No do not do this. Water is no joke.

ohtowinthelottery · 09/03/2026 17:40

Get your 16 year old to babysit the younger siblings whilst you take your baby swimming. Expecting the 16 year old to be responsible for their baby sibling in the swimming pool is not really fair and a big ask even if they're the most mature and responsible 16 year old on the planet.

Assistledoggo · 09/03/2026 17:41

Girasoli · 09/03/2026 17:38

I would take the baby swimming while the 10 and 5 year olds are at school, or are you thinking more about holidays?

This is the answer. Take the baby when the rest are at school

SmoothOperatorCarlosSainz · 09/03/2026 17:41

YABU and stop farming out parental responsibility to your other children.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 09/03/2026 17:41

Swimmin · 09/03/2026 17:38

It's 1 parent 2 children for under 8s but even though my 10 year old is 10 he's suspected ASD and there's no way I could have the younger 3.

I would like to take the children swimming when it's a bit warmee so baby will be 4+ months

Even if he took 5yo I'm not sure he'd be allowed because even tho he's 16 he looks younger than his age so in asking how they do it and know that there 16 or over

It would be helpful if you clarified wether you intend for your 16 year old and baby to be in the pool with you, or wether you aim to send 16 year old and baby swimming while you stay home

Wingingit73 · 09/03/2026 17:42

Very irresponsible tbh. What are you thinking?

Tootiredforthis23 · 09/03/2026 17:42

Do you mean with you there as well? If so then surely that’s fine as the 16 year old would presumably be able to watch the 5 or 10 year old rather than hold the baby?

90sTrifle · 09/03/2026 17:42

Swimmin · 09/03/2026 17:26

Hi everyone, baby is only 8 weeks so a while yet but just thinking of the future.

If someone were to take him swimming he needs supervised by a person 16+ how strict are they on that? Do they ask to see ID? Some under 16s look older than their age…

i have 16, 14, 10 and 5 year old also. younger 2 need me

would it be U to give money to my 16 to take him to the baby pool? but i’d say my 16 year old looks younger than his age

If something were to happen to the younger sibling, the 16 yo has to carry that with him for the rest of their life.

Do not put that kind of responsibility onto your teenage son.

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 09/03/2026 17:43

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

WhatNoRaisins · 09/03/2026 17:43

I enjoyed baby swimming but is not something that a baby needs to do. I get that you're struggling with your children but I don't get why it needs to be swimming.