To not make DD6 (Year 1) do homework?

[Thesnailonthewhale]

She was 6 in December, an she's above age related expectations in all areas. Reading age of 8y6m.doing Year 2 maths etc

School are getting a bit uppity about her not completing the set homework each week. (Spellings, some maths sheets etc)

She reads every day without being prompted and is incredibly inquisitive etc helps around the house, plays creatively, is active.
She counts coins at shops, does puzzle books, can tell the time to quarters and halfs and (still working on 5 mins) - weighs and measures ingredients for cooking and baking etc. (all applied maths)

Should I make her do the extra stuff? I can't see the point personally.

Is it because it is too easy?

DD was clever and quite a bit ahead of expectations at primary school and she used to literally weep with boredom when she had stuff to do for homework that she had fully understood years ago, even when she was older than 6. I did not make her do it and it did not hold her back, nor impact on her work ethic. She worked hard and did very well at school and is off to study at Oxford in the autumn.

She's 2 years and 6 months ahead in reading... She's 6 and her reading age is 8y6m.

And she most definitely is doing Year 2 maths at school, because they are in ability groups, she's with another Year 1, and year 2s and she is doing the Year 2 workbooks...

Hand reading, yes, she'll either read to herself (currently reading Matilda), or we'll team read ,or I'll read to her, or she'll read to me. She spends probably around an hour a day or more reading or being read to.

If she’s so smart, it would take her no time? Why wouldn’t she just do it if she’s so clever?

Who knows 🤷‍♀️

It is miserable having to waste time on things that you fully understand and could do well some time ago. DD found it really awful.

And homework at primary level has very little effect on attainment or progress anyway, as shown by research. This little girl is better off reading Matilda or whatever.

Maybe because she’s smart she values her time

I think she should get into a good routine of doing it. It really sets them up for studying and discipline later on. My dc always had homework, doesn’t know any different and now that they’re heading off to secondary school it’s so part of their normal day. I’ve never had to nag and be a helicopter parent when it came to exam time.

@Thesnailonthewhale she sounds textbook autistic with PDA profile. Have you looked into an assessment?
Have you tried framing everything as a choice, this often helps with PDA. Would you like to do your homework now or later? When she says neither, explain that isn’t an option. Put the onus on her to decide so it feels like a choice rather than a demand. I’d offer to do it with her too, it might be more fun that way. It seems as if it’s been built up to be this massive thing and it’s scaring her and her body and mind are reacting. Try and make it less of a “have to” and more of a “this would benefit you”.

Dd (autistic) is like this, espescially over English homework where she has to use her comprehension and use her imagination. English where she needs to use grammar is slightly better. Maths is a bit better too. But, the thought of getting something wrong terrifies her. And even getting a maths question wrong or writing a word wrong and she will go into a full on meltdown. And you have my full sympathy as I know how horrible it is to see

Dd's teacher is very much of the opinion that if she does it then great. But, she doesn't want dd to get herself so worked up and won't mind if dd cant manage it.

Have you had a meeting with the teacher over this (sorry if I've missed it)

Why on earth does a 6 year old need to be aware of 'homework'? She has 5 years until secondary school.and she'll.grow in to that awareness when she is 6 months away from it.
Why don't we send them down the mines at the weekend just so they are aware of the working week?
Homework for 6 yr olds is an appalling concept
She should learning through natural play and the joy of books led entirely by her own inquisitive and curious nature, at her own pace.
Must be hell on earth for children (and parents of) for whom school is already a difficult experience: there is no escape from some completely made up demand that they know set things at set ages.

This behaviour from her isn’t okay, and you’ve all but given up trying to get her to do homework because it’s a pain for you dealing with her meltdowns.

If you genuinely think she isn’t just making a fuss so you’ll give in and she doesn’t have to do it then you need to take her to the GP, because this isn’t normal, it isn’t healthy and it will hinder her learning going forward.

The sheets, the spelling tasks.

This would have been useful information in your OP.

Well, she doesn't have to. See how home schooling her works out

I only made mine do homework at primary if they could do it themselves. If not, they didn’t do it: I have enough to do and time doing it won’t help them embed anything!

Dd1 got 6 9s in her GCSEs.

She needs to learn that she has to do what she’s been set. Just like when you a get a job you cat decide what tasks you get.

Of course i have.

Homework is a fucking ridiculous concept. We are teaching children that work life balance isn't a thing, and that the expectation is that you should be taking work home with you. Most adults don't take work home with them, and if they did regularly then a conversation with their manager would be necessary. If CHILDREN can't manage to get through their work between 9 and 3, then we are expecting too much from them.

My 6 year old doesn't do any homework except for reading and a bit of Numbots. She doesn't want to, and we work full time, so family time is precious, i'm not wasting it forcing her to do work. Despite what this country leads us to believe, education doesn't have to be linear and it isn't the be all and end all. My brother has an extremely lucrative job which he got thanks to hours and hours of passion dedicated to a hobby when he was younger, a hobby that required a fairly significant amount of time out of school. In contrast, I don't have a lucrative job, despite doing everything 'right' working hard at school, getting a degree, etc etc.

You can pick what job you have though and where you work, and they can make reasonable adjustments... And you don't have to do extra work after a full day, in your own time...

Plus she 6, not 26...

Oh ,are you going to pay my wages then so I can home school her...?

YABU for using the word "uppity" - it has racist history https://www.etymonline.com/word/uppity

I don't normally comment unrelated to the request in the OP, but this isn't a case of a grammatical error - it is important that everyone knows about language previously used to supress black people.

I think other posters, who you have engaged with well, have helped with your original question. I think you're very sensible to look into the underlying issues and continue to "gamify" the homework to reduce her stress.

This 100%. Imagine being one of the few who doesn't do it. Who wants to be that kid? Who wants to be that parent?

Primary school homework- beyond a bit of reading is pointless. It’s not backed up by any research. Absolutely don’t make her do it.

There's kids who can't read in the class, they're not doing the homework where they have to write 5 sentences with WOW words...

Edit - ignore that one. Probably too reactionary, and couldn't delete