To wonder why “new money” is so frowned upon in the UK?

[Namechanged2026]

Dh and I are what you would describe as ‘new money’. We both had very working class childhoods but have since earnt very well. We live in a big modern house, drive new cars (financed as it’s silly to put so much money into a depreciating asset - it works out cheaper to finance if you want a new car every 4 years) and enjoy a few abroad holidays per year (yes, we do like Dubai for the guarantee of weather, relatively short flight and quality of resorts (although we’re definitely not flashy Instagram types😂)). Our children go to private school and have had experiences that me and DH could only have dreamed of as kids.

We worked hard, got lucky and enjoy a lifestyle that we can afford. We don’t dress in tacky designer clothes (although we do have a few designer bags, belts, shoes between us), nor are we ‘flashy’.

But why is there so much snobbery towards this in the UK? Many people on super low incomes would talk about my situation negatively in a way that would suggest they would rather chose a lifestyle with a modest income and fewer luxuries because it’s almost embarrassing to want more than this. I see working class people use the phrase “money talks, wealth whispers” in reference to anything that looks like it might have been very obviously expensive. What do these people think that they would do if they all of a sudden had a super high income… just remain as they are as “money talks”?! Of course not. Yet they see no problem with the “old school” kind of wealth (country estates, kids at boarding school, muddy wellies etc etc).

It’s only in the UK that I think this attitude exists. In other countries it seems like such a positive thing to aim for a high flying career, to admit to wanting to earn as much money as possible, to discuss wanting to travel lavishly and experience lots of things. It’s actively encouraged. However in the UK, I think there is an attitude of mocking these kind of attitudes and suggesting people are shallow for aiming for this. I remember being at uni and telling a family friend that I wanted to buy a house in X area when I was older, only to be met with “is round here (a council estate) not good enough for you then?”.

Old money sits quietly in the bank.
New money is splashed about proudly.

I think there's a correlation between the way people think someone upper class speaks and they way they think they live.
There's a thread on what makes people "posh" running (maybe it's the OP looking for tips? 😛) and someone suggests that a posh person might say:
No darling, do not choose THAT university to attend, it is simply subordinate to our familial reputation...
Nobody speaks like that!

But if you don't mix with people who speak correctly, that's perhaps how you think people in a different classes speak: all big (but misused) words and artificial lack of contractions.
Hence too all the "A posh invitation was sent to my husband and I" type of sentences (the late queen only used "My husband and I" when it was grammatically correct and, apparently, tried to stop avoid it when she realised it was seen as her catch phrase).
"I" and "myself" are seen as "posher" or more educated than "me" even when "me" is the correct word to use.

Similarly, people may use or treat what they see as status symbols differently depending whether they're used to them or not.
For example, someone who lives on a country estate might get a Range Rover because it's the most practical car for their lifestyle.
A person with new money might think "The woman at Poshly Manor has a Range Rover; I'll get one too because it must be classy" despite its main use being for the school run and shopping.

It's the trope of the nouveau riche trying to copy the upper classes that provides a lot of the humour in Jilly Cooper's books.

No , as my example gave - I’m sure people actually think he’s old money - I just don’t go with the ‘we worked hard for it’ ethos - plenty of people with lots of money haven’t , both old and new money.

These are the same sort of individuals who get absolutely plastered on alcohol when abroad. Doesn't mean that alcohol isn't unislamic

Riapia
Old money sits quietly in the bank.
New money is splashed about proudly.

And neither way is wrong!

Heard a financial planner the other day saying he’s not of the old school train of thought because his dad penny pinched until the day he died, was always miserable and never enjoyed his money. He always wanted to leave his kids an inheritance to show them what hard work could achieve but didn’t get that they’d have rather he’d enjoyed the money and been happy. He said life with him was watching him be angry and grumpy all the time, and they were given out to constantly for any spending that wasn’t fully necessary.

I don’t even have social media.

Mumsnet is social media.

And you’ve proved my point. New money doesn’t have to be what you’ve stated. Just because someone was born poor yet achieved “new money” it doesn’t mean they spend it like you’ve stated.

It baffles me that averagely earning working and middle class people frown upon people of their own class earning money and stereotyping like you have. They speak positively about “old money” and negatively about “new money” as if they presume they’d become more like the way they describe old money if ever they earned a lot of money!

So in order to not be perceived negatively, people who earn lots of money should leave it in the bank instead of spending it on a nice lifestyle?

Well, on Middle Eastern conspicuous consumption, in some places (the UAE, for one), there's simply no 'old money'. Certainly none that predates oil when a loosely interconnected set of semi-nomadic tribes had lived by piracy and pearl-fishing as a semi-British protectorate. People who had lived in harsh conditions as nomadic camel herders had grandchildren living sedentary, tech-heavy lives in cities. Money by definition there can't be 'old money'.

I see it celebrated in America and frowned upon the UK. It’s definitely a British thing of looking down on anybody who seems to have more than you!

I think there's a difference between having nice stuff wearing it, using it whatever and blatantly going and saying "oh look at me I have a Rolex. I am so much better than you"

There is definitely old money snobbery in America, particularly those who claim to trace their ancestry back to the pilgrim fathers, or pre civil war in the south.

People are both tribal and sour - if you deviate from the herd due to wealth or aspiration then you're perceived as fair target for witchy comments.

Its the adult equivalent of being a spekky four eyes in school.

We all turn a blind eye because it's anonymous. The kind being referred to is the "look at me" kind - and I agree with with the associations above. To me the height of classlessness is splashing yourself about on it.

agree

OP you are speaking as though you are unusual. Where I live the way you live is ten a penny, I’m falling over people who earn well and splash their cash on show houses, expensive cars, holidays and private school. They are perfectly pleasant people. They do talk about how much they have a lot and for that reason I probably wouldn’t chose to be in the inner circle of that. We earn well but like to save and so I tend to be surrounded with people loving very average lifestyles and we talk about boring stuff. Birds of a feather and that’s absolutely fine.

I was listening to the Rest is Ebtertainment podcast where they were discussing the influencers who flocked to Dubai and everything is basically showing off the skyline and looking perfect whilst eating high end food. I thought they broke it down really well. Worth a listen.

That's what people don't seem to understand. Class is more than just what you earn . Think of impoverished gentility. They don't suddenly become working class

This is just a rebadged “I earn 250k but don’t see myself as rich” thread. Proabably same OP. Getting tiresome now.

Because the "splash the cash" attitude is perceived to be vulgar. And we can't have that now, can we darling. 🤨

I know a few very wealthy people.

The difference is that with the Old Money crew, they never really talk about their money or material things. The new money people I know harp on about it and drop things into conversations so everyone knows they Have Money.

Am I envious of those with wealth? Yes of course. But to say the twattishness of a lot of people with new money is me being jealous of them
ia ridiculous.

Maybe you are pretending you are not working class anymore. After all class is more than money

I remember many threads in the last few months about high earners and simple vitriol saying they didn't deserve it or earn it and they were just lucky. Saying high earners should be grateful for all the high taxes they pay.

Class certainly isn’t going to Dubai on holiday or buying expensive cars on finance! Going to Dubai just screams that you have zero interest in culture whatsoever. Your only interest is buying stuff and getting too hot.