To find "Mrs" in a work email signature a bit cringe

[Whyohwhyohwhy26]

Just that really, is this a new thing or I'm just noticing it more nowadays that some female colleagues have Mrs first name last name on their email signatures where the norm is just names + job title etc. I've never seen a male colleague's email signature be "Mr X" and i'd find that equally odd to be honest. Unless it's a professional title like Dr or Professor AIBU to think putting your personal title in an email signature a bit cringe ?

@Redbushteaforme Are you a Miss?

Many of the suffragette were Mrs.

Simply because it's not how you see it doesnt mean its not possible

I use Mrs. Many would say I am a feminist. Personally I use the term equalist as I feel we should work towards an equal society. That goes for both genders for me. I can still be Mrs and have views that are progressive.

@Enko The Suffrragette were not of modern day.

Interesting, why would you would find it cringe for someone to use Ms in their email signature while you use Mrs?
We tend to only refer to those with professional titles in something formal email or to someone external to specify that persons role or where we require documentation to completed with their full title, but none of my colleagues with a PHD actually sign off as Dr X to internal colleagues.

My point was more you can be many things and still have values and beliefs. And the suffragettes. Started things many are building on today

I don’t think it’s anything to do with claiming to be a feminist - no one claims to be one you just believe in equality or don’t.

A fundamental element of feminism is that women should be able to decide how to live their lives and that applies to titles - it’s not for anyone to police other women’s choices - equally if a women chooses to wear a hijab that is her choice and not for others to police and judge and so on for many other examples.

As I said earlier a man can’t be a feminist - they have not got a woman’s lived experience - they can be an ally sure but not a feminist.

we have moved away from the somewhat prescriptive nature of second generation feminism into something more intersectional and I believe choice of title / last name falls into that. Women may chose to change their last name for many reasons and it’s not for others to judge (also a rather sad comment to assume they have married men and adopted the man’s Lastname - rather a patriarchal assumption surely).

Arguing about titles and last names is distracting from very real threats that women face - calling yourself Ms dos nothing to address the issue of violence against women and girls or indeed the very real threat to women’s rights posed by reform. It won’t gain equal pay and end discrimination in the workplace or change who carries out the majority of caring tasks in the home. In many cases it’s nothing but a virtue signal.

I don’t care how people chose to title / last name themselves - I do care about the things I’ve mentioned above and the casual sexism which is rife in everyday life (much of it from men and women who call themselves feminists). I care about women describing themselves as girls and the diminishing and infantilising of them which this does.

Do people even address each other as miss, ms or mrs these days in a work capacity?? I don't call anyone mrs so n so, I call them Kathy etc. Terribly old fashioned if anyone is! I hate the fact that we are categorised by whether we are married or not. Fuck the patriarchy.

except apparently if you use Mrs in your signature and then you don't want to live and let live

I’m a solicitor, really common in my profession. I find it so insulting.

One person at my work does this. I do find it weird. She also has a clearly feminine name so it’s not as if she could be mistaken for a ‘Mr’ otherwise.

@KittyMcKitty Why take on Mrs as a title?Genuine answer.

Genuine answer why not? Women have the right to choose - they may choose to show themselves as a family unit to signify commitment to an other. They may change their name to distance themselves from difficult family situations or any myriad of other reasons. They may just want to - it’s not for others to judge.

my point is that calling yourself Ms does not mean you’re doing anything to actively dismantle the ingrained sexism in society and conversely styling yourself Mrs doesn’t mean you’re not.

its just something people get uptight about which serves no purpose and is a distraction from the many forms of discrimination women face - get bothered about those and work towards change as opposed to criticising how women chose to style their names.

Why does it bother you so much? Genuine answer (given that in Britain your last name is very often that of your fathers which by your logic should be equally problematic).

@KittyMcKitty Because you are declaring your marital status. No need. Men don't.

Yeah it’s a bit weird.
To me, Mrs B…. is my mother in
law!

But surely women have the right to choose?

Earlier you implied a link to choice of title and ability to be a feminist. My argument is that there is no link. Arguing about titles is just noise distracting from the very real issues which do need to be addressed.

i have no idea whether you are female and how you choose to title yourself (or not) but that is your choice.

I guess my point is there are so many more important things to argue against and fight for change why do people persist with this?

Anyway it’s Late and I’m tired and have spent the day being called Miss, Ms and Mrs by very many pupils and their parents at work and if I’m honest none of the titles bother me. I introduce myself to parents as Firstname Lastname. I would introduce myself to students as Mrs Lastname. Colleagues generally refer to me as Mrs Lastname when students are around but sometimes call me Miss. It’s all pretty irrelevant really (incidentally my bank account t just calls me Firstname Lastname which according to the bank was a massive problem).

Uktimately feminism is about what you do not how you style your name 😊

I haven't seen this for years! And I work in a big organisation with a big range of ages of employees.

However in my job about 15 years ago, two or three of my 50-something colleagues did the whole 'Jane Smith (Mrs) in their email signature. So I think I do see it as old-fashioned.

I do however have plenty of colleagues who put their pronouns in their signature and one who has their Enneagram number and Myers Briggs type in theirs!

@KittyMcKitty I was a primary teacher for years. Always challenged it when children called me Mrs when they knew I was married. An important learning point.

Ive only seen this in in the UK outside of education in a v large organisation where there were two people with same name but one was a dr, other got sick of being confused with her eg Mrs Jane Smith to distinguish from Dr Jane Smith.

@BestBefore2000you do seem somewhat stuck on titles and ignoring everything else I’ve said.

I have no issue with being called Mrs generally though. I don't really care if it "advertises my marital status", my husbands ring does that too & i don't wear mine and haven't for years since breaking my finger left it wonky and hard to get rings on.

@SuzyFandango Why do people need to know?

Calling yourself Ms dos nothing to address the issue of violence against women and girls or indeed the very real threat to women’s rights posed by reform. It won’t gain equal pay and end discrimination in the workplace or change who carries out the majority of caring tasks in the home. In many cases it’s nothing but a virtue signal.

Neither does calling yourself Mrs. I don't agree with the poster you were disagreeing with either, but this is a double standard. Also what exactly does virtue signalling mean in this context, and how have you assessed this? Because it doesn't sit very well with your earlier points about judging and not being prescriptive.

Are they American? I grew up there and we addressed all adults as Mrs/Ms/Mr and their first name.

I have a unisex name, and have never used a title in emails. Nobody when speaking to me on the phone or in person, for the first time, has ever died of surprise. Mrs is cringe, I agree. If I absolutely have to (when filling out those drop down boxes), I use Ms. I’ve never heard of Mx. How’s that even pronounced?

My GP’s surgery used to send out letters addressed to my toddler son as “Master.” What the heck was that all about? It’s like we were in colonial times. That was mega-cringe.

Possibly as a subtle protest against the pronoun people?