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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Starting to hate being motherhood

82 replies

ivise · 04/03/2026 14:55

Hello.
who else feels like they been sold a lie about being a mum?
well in my early 30s I have realised that this is definitely not for everyone and only small percentage can do it how it should be .
I have a 6 year old daughter who I love but also realising that I am struggling to connect with her due to me actually hating the motherhood.
I wish that I was more educated about what this life will be prior to getting pregnant at 27. That bringing child not in your birth country will make you isolated , not having village is going to drive you insane and deprive of things . Not being financially on the rich side will make you feel like failure . Struggling to cope with your emotions let alone kids . Not being able just to get up and leave this miserable relationship with your baby dad will make you crazy . Let’s not even start school run, school birthdays .
I am definitely one and done mum but if I knew all this prior I probably be kid free .
I am definitely will be discussing this with my daughter , tell her reality of this . I wish I knew all this .

OP posts:
ivise · 04/03/2026 16:25

@AnneLovesGilbert well that would be ideal 50/50. I have told him several times to move but he isn’t even listening . I hate play happy families , I hate cooking . I hate not having my family around . I hate it all

OP posts:
ivise · 04/03/2026 16:32

@GreenAppleAndALilSalt I did enjoy more when she was at that stage . I don’t enjoy it now . I find it hard to see this as something enjoyable anymore . It’s almost like an unbearable task on survival mode

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 04/03/2026 16:33

You don’t need his permission to end the relationship. You’re not married? Do you rent or own? Do you work? You can’t force him to be the primary parent but can’t force you either.

PeonyPatch · 04/03/2026 16:45

Tbh, I think you need to focus on solutions and problem-solving rather than wallowing (which won’t help you) unfortunately. It’ll just keep you stuck.

Can you join some support groups or mother and child groups? Make friends? Play dates? Meet others from your country or culture? There are others in your boat who do not have a family support network in this country, but you’ll have to get your support elsewhere.

Have you got any hobbies or interests that you could focus on for a bit of a break from time to time?

Have you spoken to your partner about this? I wonder how much you’ve actually tried to work on some of your difficulties here. It’s very easy to succumb to negative feelings…

mydogisthebest · 04/03/2026 16:47

It's really not that uncommon to feel the way you do. I am in my 70's and could not even begin to count how many woman (and men) have told me that although they love their children if they could go back in time they would not have any. I am not talking about people with young children either but, most often, grown up children often with grandchildren or even great grandchildren.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 04/03/2026 17:03

GreenAppleAndALilSalt · 04/03/2026 16:19

The thing is, you can completely flip this and see this from a different perspective. My son is 3 months old, and when I look at the future now I feel so optimistic and happy and excited about doing things with him, and seeing him experience the world. I’ve just been buying him his little summer outfits on Vinted, and browsing all the cute dungarees and tiny sun hats is just making me feel so happy thinking about being on the beach with him this summer.

We went swimming earlier together, and it was just so magical watching him experience the water. So actually, in a way, I think I feel more free than I did before having him: I feel a lot more positive and full of enthusiasm for the future, and like opportunities are endless.

Yes, I think it can very much depend on what your life was before and how much you miss that, but also what you can enjoy now.

I wanted a more outdoorsy life, and that's very kid friendly.

I was already over my clubbing phase, and I also look forwards to showing my son the travel.

But I also get more random joy in my life than ever before. My son laughed himself stupid at bedtime trying to make us eat his bogies. I am more proud than I ever have been before. I am more disciplined with my health and finances, because now my goals are a lot more long term.

I think it's been a bigger shock to my husband because he didn't have the intel MN gives on the drudge.

ivise · 04/03/2026 17:04

@PeonyPatch I know but I am so mentally down that I barely survive the day let alone make friends . I can’t even think of anything worse right now . Be nice to have a family support at least someone who already knows you and can just be there .
I am crying myself to sleep because I am dreading of the next day , thinking off again taking care of everyone makes me feel like I want to give up

OP posts:
PeonyPatch · 04/03/2026 17:06

ivise · 04/03/2026 17:04

@PeonyPatch I know but I am so mentally down that I barely survive the day let alone make friends . I can’t even think of anything worse right now . Be nice to have a family support at least someone who already knows you and can just be there .
I am crying myself to sleep because I am dreading of the next day , thinking off again taking care of everyone makes me feel like I want to give up

Where are your family exactly? Can you visit them or can they visit you? Have you thought about getting counselling? Sounds like you need support.

ivise · 04/03/2026 17:11

@PeonyPatch someone who would help would be mum but she left uk and now is working In Norway . Plus she left me her cat who has issues . Now I need to worry about that too. I don’t think my mum gets me because she left me at age of 11 to go and work abroad . So since then I been growing up pretty much alone .

OP posts:
PeonyPatch · 04/03/2026 17:23

ivise · 04/03/2026 17:11

@PeonyPatch someone who would help would be mum but she left uk and now is working In Norway . Plus she left me her cat who has issues . Now I need to worry about that too. I don’t think my mum gets me because she left me at age of 11 to go and work abroad . So since then I been growing up pretty much alone .

That’s a shame. Can you talk to your mum and explain how you feel, let her know you need support? I don’t know what your relationship is like. What about your in laws? What about your partner?

DickieAnderson · 04/03/2026 17:53

ErlingHaalandsManBun · 04/03/2026 16:17

Surely most of this is obvious though is it not?

Your body will not be quite the same after birth as it was before, you won't have as much free time, your freedom is gone. Why did you think it would be any different? Babies and raising children takes time, effort and commitment so of course your life will not be the same as it was and your own time will be less.

However saying all that, with the right support there is no reason why you can't find time to get your body back to a better place afterwards. With some time and effort its possible. When I had both mine I still went running, trained and ran half marathons and marathons.

And there is also still a life to be had outside of children I went out regularly with my DH and friends and my DH and I had family time and also our own time to do our own things while the other stayed with the kids. Its all about balance.

So it IS possible but only if you have the support of your partner and family.

I suspect from your post that you have neither?

I don’t think it’s that helpful for people to comment when they clearly don’t understand and are in a much better position mentally, physically and emotionally, it’s very hard to be proactive and positive when you are struggling and feeling overwhelmed and depressed as the OP clearly is.
She mentions having no real support and not being in her home country and your comment about how you aren’t feeling the same as her is literally based on you having support which you acknowledge.

I don’t think it is that simple to say it’s obvious about how hard motherhood is when as a childfree person I constantly get told how worthwhile it is, how I’m missing out and how nothing else matters when “you experience the greatest love you’ve ever known”.
I was lucky to have multiple friends with children who were honest about how hard they found things and I witnessed it so no amount of love was making me sacrifice my freedom or being depended on by someone else constantly and having to put myself second. I get told that’s selfish but I think most humans are intrinsically selfish and that’s why a lot of people struggle.
Also as a pp says some people just aren’t touchy feely and don’t realise how difficult it will be to be constantly needed and climbed on and followed around. A lot of my friends have children in bed with them every night just to get some sleep and are constantly exhausted because the kids are even lying on them or holding onto them through the night. Their marriages suffer because they say they are just “mummy and daddy” now and their marriage constantly comes second.

I think you are in quite a privileged position to have the support you do and a huge amount of men don’t split childcare fairly, my parents used to look after my niece and nephew when my sister was at work until she finished when her husband started work early and finished mid afternoon, they would pick up the kids from school and have them till she finished work because her husband said he needed rest after such an early start!
I don’t know anyone who didn’t have to juggle things massively just to go to the gym for an hour, they would have laughed at the idea of running a marathon.

The only person I know who got to live a life similar to before having children was my sister and that’s only because of the massive amount of support and childcare she got from my parents and seeing the strain on them meant even if I wanted children I wouldn’t have felt comfortable doing the same to them.

I also have friends who were offered a lot of support but wouldn’t accept it and gave up everything to dedicate their lives to their kids. We couldn’t even meet for a quick coffee without them bringing their kids along despite offers to babysit and now the kids are grown up and doing their own thing they resent it and wish they had kept up with friendships or not put their lives on hold, some people don’t realise how important it is not to always put themselves last until it’s too late.

I know this is just my own experiences but spending any time on mumsnet shows this isn’t unusual. I have seen so many similar threads to this one about people regretting parenthood or struggling and there are a lot of online groups with thousands of members who feel the same.
Over the years I’ve lost count of people who went from telling me I was missing out not having kids to admitting if they had their time again they wouldn’t have had any.

I’m so happy for you that you feel differently but I don’t think it’s fair to the OP to feel like she’s unreasonable for how she’s feeling because some people were offered (and actually accepted) more support or were in a position to enjoy parenting. This is the attitude that means people go ahead and have children and think it’ll be the same for them then struggle and feel resentful and lied to.

It’s a shame people can’t train to become parents or do work experience to see if they are really cut out for it.

I think if people could have a taster session first they might realise just how hard it is and be able to make a proper informed decision.
I do think that would have a terrible impact on the falling birthrate though and lead to our species dying out!

pinkyredrose · 04/03/2026 18:04

OP whose house do you live in, is it in joint names/your name?

thecatneuterer · 04/03/2026 19:17

Haemagoblin · 04/03/2026 15:03

I am definitely will be discussing this with my daughter , tell her reality of this . I wish I knew all this .

I would really advocate that you refrain from telling your daughter how much you hate motherhood and how having her has ruined your life. For god's sake. You are her mum, it is no longer all about you.

My mother was very honest about how difficult motherhood is, when I was a child. I knew she loved me and it wasn't personal. It didn't harm our relationship in any way. As it was I never had any desire to have children, but if I had been undecided I would have been very grateful for her input.

NeedAdvice6432 · 04/03/2026 19:37

OP, this isn't so much about motherhood but other areas of your life. You need to address your relationship issues and depression (you are clearly depressed to me).

Blaming everything on motherhood is just a way for you to not face your problems. You can make positive changes but only you can make them.

WhatNextImScared · 04/03/2026 19:38

Damnd · 04/03/2026 14:57

People do tell you the reality but nobody listens

This. I definitely didn’t.

ivise · 04/03/2026 19:49

@NeedAdvice6432 maybe could be the case . I just find it hard right know to take care of anyone’s emotions and needs while I can’t even handle my own . And it’s all seems so be like one big repeated nightmare .

OP posts:
Sweetcorn100 · 04/03/2026 19:51

I’m not sure what country you’re from so can only speak from my experience but I’ve always been told and been very aware that motherhood is hard. No one has ever told me it’s easy peasy. It’s a well known fact that most babies don’t sleep well so you’ll be tired. It’s well known toddlers and young kids are demanding and that teenagers can be stroppy and go through hormonal stages.

I am not sure who sold you the fact motherhood is easy and all sunshine and roses.

ivise · 04/03/2026 19:53

@thecatneuterermy mum always been very cold to us and she actually said to me that she never wanted me and tried to get rid of but didn’t succeed . But the way she told like it was just a normal story. But thinking of it now and then I couldn’t imagine saying that to my child . She wasn’t loved so she couldn’t give us although I know she cared about me in some type of way but not the nurturing way .

OP posts:
goz · 04/03/2026 19:54

This reply has been deleted

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Newyearawaits · 04/03/2026 19:57

Peonies12 · 04/03/2026 15:00

It's hard to share the reality until you experience it. Please don't make your daughter feel unwanted by being too honest about how you feel. It sounds like your relationship is the main issue here, does your partner do their fair share of parenting and household tasks?

This 100pc
OP, sooooo many mothers feel like you but few admit it.
But Don't tell your daughter
As hard as it is, please take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up for feeling like you do

Newyearawaits · 04/03/2026 20:02

Jellybunny56 · 04/03/2026 15:11

I don’t understand all of your points here.

  • Body changes- yeah, it grew a whole human, that does cause changes. I don’t know how that came as a surprise? BUT change isn’t bad, I actually think knowing my body grew and fed two babies made me appreciate my body far more than I did beforehand.
  • Health will decline after birth- does it? I don’t think that’s a blanket rule. I’ve had 2 babies, youngest is 4 months old, my health is arguably better than it was before having children. I run, I weight train, I eat healthy, my health certainly hasn’t been damaged by pregnancy and birth.
  • Won’t be able to get “time off”, as I said in my last post, children have two parents. I still get to go for a run, gym class, evening meal out, night away etc. My husband is just as much their parent as I am, we both get time off to ourselves.

Thanks but for several women, it is single parenthood or a partnership that is very much unequal.
I'm glad that your parenting is shared

Gingerbreadlattetoppingsontheside · 04/03/2026 20:07

I think the question of how we tell our children they might well be better off without having children is hugely taboo.

Whilst trying to do what's best for them is obviously trying not to make them feeling unwanted or unloved, im not sure instilling the next generation with the automatic assumption they will love being parents is in their best interests either

Peacexbliss · 04/03/2026 20:23

Ive been in pjs and bed all day, only getting up for a few hot drinks and the loo.
I have a rotton stinking awful cold.
I dont have kids or pets im single and live alone and im bloody thankful for it, i can only imagine having to get up and deal with kids when feeling like this.

marcyhermit · 04/03/2026 20:34

Your boyfriend won't leave but can you leave?
Find your own flat and have your daughter every other weekend and for a sleepover during the week?

Chattycatt · 04/03/2026 22:25

You have to change your mindset or you’ll end up ill.

You only get one life and you can find joy - even if it seems impossible right now.

What do you like doing? Do you have friends? Are you working?

There’s help out there - you don’t need to suffer like this

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