To put 2yo in with older boys?

[RoomDynamics]

I have 5 dc, my eldest (dd) has her own room downstairs. My eldest boy (12) has his own room the smallest then ds 5 and ds 4 share and im planning on buying bunk beds in the future there's only 16 months between them so they have always shared

i have a 2yo boy that is currently in with me in his cot still (he only turned 2 at the end of december so is a young 2 iyswim) but i think him knowing im there unsettles him he barely sleeps and wants a bottle through the night which i think is for comfort as he has a bottle before bed so he isnt thirsty and then wants to get in my bed but still doesnt settle and it's causing issues during the day with constant whinging and crying and then gets really overtired so it's a cycle

i was hesitant to put him in with the older boys as he still seems a baby in many ways maybe that's just me as he is the youngest but 3 in a room seems so cramped esp with his cot and i don't want him in a proper bed as i can image him getting up and wanting to play with their toys and disturbing them plus they have lego in a set of toy drawers which is a hazard in with a 2 year old around during the night with no supervision

wwyd?

You cannot have 3 children sharing one bedroom whilst allowing your 2 other children to have their own bedrooms. That isn't fair.

I would have thought disturbing you is better than disturbing two other young children - potentially leaving three children awake.

Three children in one room also seems a bit much when two others have their own rooms.

How old is your daughter - is she close to university age?

Keep your two year old in with you.

I'm going to ask anyway - why have you chosen to have 5 children when it is clear you do not have sufficient space?

If he doesn’t sleep with you in the room what makes you think he would sleep in a room with two other children? It seems like he would be just as distracted from sleep surely? But the knock on of him affecting the sleep of two young children seems worse.

dd has always had her own room being the only girl, my son is 13 this year and sharing with a 5/6 year old doesnt seen appropriate

his room is also tiny and only has space for his bed, drawers and his tv and shelves. No way would another bed fit

Do you have the ability to turn back time?

@goz No I have the ability to make sensible decisions and plan in relation to what housing I have available.

What's the layout of your home? Maybe rethinking everyone's bedrooms would help? Do the sharing dc have the biggest room? Is there any scope for dividing a room?

@RoomDynamics How old is your daughter?

It’s quite a new thing for people to be obsessed with children having their own rooms. Not everyone thinks it’s necessary or even ideal.

You chose to have a 5th child without enough room for them so I don't think your other children should suffer what about a sofa bed in the living room for you and then the 2 year old can have his own room

Buy a bigger house or get a loft conversion or extension.
I would perhaps not have had the 5th child without somewhere to put it. But that ship has sailed.

Its not about children having their own rooms its about putting a 2year old whos up all night in a room with other children

@Goz We're not talking about children having their own bedrooms here.

We're talking about cramming 3 children into one room whilst 2 others have their own rooms - which is unfair.

You in the living room, two who currently share in the biggest bedroom (is it possible to split it with a tempory wall?), two oldest keep their rooms (unless desperate to swap), youngest in remaining room.

Yeah my granny had 4 girls in 1 room and 3 boys in another. But these were the days you could get a council house and the rooms could fit multiple beds.
But houses are smaller now. She literally said another bed wouldn't fit in the 12yo room and she hasn't even suggested every kid should have their own room anyway.

Can you wait until daughter moves out at 18? How long away is that

What makes you think your 2yr old will not be disturbed by 2 of his brothers being in a small room together?

You take the small room, then put the 13 and two year old in the bigger one and get it properly divided

Logically it seems a really daft idea to put a 2 year old you know doesn't settle into a room with two other children who will suffer at having their sleep disturbed.

I would be looking into sofa beds and making more space for the other children.

We need a house diagram with measurements and if private rent , or bought ?

None of your business.

How big is your bedroom OP? Could you potentially put a temp wall up to create a little “room” for your youngest that way? What about downstairs, is there a dining room or any other space that could become another bedroom? I don’t think it would be great for anyone involved to have 3 children sharing a room especially at those ages, but equally I don’t think your daughter could or should share with younger boys and if there is no space in your oldest son’s room then that probably doesn’t work to double up either.

Three young children can definitely share a bedroom. Whether they all sleep better is another matter altogether.