I am not a "person who menstruates"

[auserna]

AIBU to think that terms such as "birthing person", "partner with eggs", "womb-carrier", "cervix haver", "people who menstruate", "chest-feeder" are not only insulting to women but downright hurtful to those who have any gynaecological and/or fertility issues, including DSDs?

Those terms may be considered inclusive to/by people whose gender identity doesn't match their sex (c.0.5% in the UK) but are exclusive to those with DSDs or gynaecological issues (c.12% in the UK).

NB My figures are rough, partly because the statistics relating to people with DSDs are very contentious and because "gynaecological issues" is a broad term, but they are clearly significantly higher for the latter group.

I used to be so accepting of this.

I saw a trans gentleman with hair and badge of a female yesterday serving me. Now, I get annoyed, I try be as polite as possible but really think, you're a threat to me in many ways as a woman. I have no time for this nonsense anymore.

I agree with you here. A real woman would think such terms are all a load of boll tbh

Not to mention someone who is menopausal. 🙄

They're absolutely ludicrous.

Yes of course - I should have included that, too. That's a fair few women!

That’s me. Haven’t had a period for years. I’m still a woman though!

I've never had a period as I have no eggs. Fuck off with telling me I'm not a woman.

I did a maternity nursing course some years ago, and that was fine, but when I looked into doing some CPD with them a year or 2 later they'd gone over to using 'chest-feeding' so I dropped them like a hot brick. MATERNITY nursing professionals!!

Not doing very well today - also missed off people who may have had their breasts or cervix or ovaries or uterus removed because of cancer. Are they not women either?

(Of course they fucking are, and how dare you even obliquely imply otherwise.)

Yanbu - we really really need to correct these statements at every turn.

Honestly I don't care. I refer to myself however I choose, and inform others to refer to me in that way where it's needed. I just don't take everything as a slur towards me. If someone refused to use my chosen terms then I'd start taking issue, but until then it's just getting angry over nothing.

I don't feel threatened by how anybody else chooses to identify.

Yanbu. My local clinic had a sign saying ‘people with a cervix’ should have a smear test. I complained and they did change it to women and transmen with a cervix. If you are that fragile in your identity just don’t bother identifying as a different sex then.

Are you from the past?

Dozens of threads like these on MN over the last decade.

And now it really isn't happening as much, if at all.

You're very late.

And not only this, but TRAs also seem to get away with calling gender critical women TERFs, transphobes and bigots with impunity, which makes me similarly livid. But woe betide you if you misgender the 6'3" "woman" with an Adam's apple and a five-o'-clock shadow.

No, I'm not from the past and I know this isn't a brand new phenomenon, but I just this afternoon saw a video referring to "partners with eggs".

People can identify how they wish, but it's when they start expecting the entire world to bend around them that I object.

One of the many problems I have with this nonsense is that when people are talking about issues that may affect women it's so much clearer and easier to join up the dots if you keep hearing the word 'woman'.

• Men earn more than women.
• Men commit almost all sexual offences, women hardly any.
• Men commit 80%+ of violent offences, women under 20%.
• Men are in and out of public toilets a lot quicker than women and need them for fewer things.
• Men's careers are not affected by needing maternity leave, whereas most women's are at some point, and men are less likely to take parental leave or to be carers.

Or:

• Womb havers earn less than prostate havers.
• Most sexual offences are committed by cis males and people with a female gender identity but were born in the wrong body. Very few sexual offenders are people who identify as cis females or transmen.
• Etc etc.

Also it may not be new, but it's still happening and I don't think that should be deemed acceptable.

A video from where?

Made by whom?

I'm with you OP, and they never talk about men like this do they?

Yes it’s offensive. It’s also deeply misogynistic as these dehumanising terms are almost exclusively addressed at women, whilst men are referred to as men.

But are they using it in a context about menstruation? I mean I am a post menopausal woman so still very definitely a woman but no longer a ‘person who menstruates’

I am no longer particularly interested in tampon ads or Moon Cups or discussions about heavy or painful periods so if this is used to direct a discussion towards ‘people who menstruate’ who are more interested in those issues then I guess that’s OK. People who menstruate will be a subset of women. Less so if it’s just a poor attempt at a euphemism for woman.

"partners with eggs".

Mrs Easter Bunny has one of those!

Indeed. Also, anything statistics-related (such as crime stats) is rendered entirely meaningless if men are recorded as women.

I marked up a client's family friendly policies recently. Due to the original using Birthing Parent and Non-Birthing Parent, it made for a challenging read to determine when they meant a father/mother's partner and when they meant someone or a couple adopting. And then they'd so confused themselves they had stated the rights of a primary adopter taking adoption leave, together with what we old fashioned types would call maternity leave, under a section headed "Birthing Parent Leave" 🙃