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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH always making some sort of noise.

121 replies

Yourinmyspot · 22/02/2026 20:13

As said in the title DH is always making some sort of noise he’s either burping, groaning, coughing, sniffing, biting his nails or snoring it drives me mad! I know some of it is me as I’ve never been very good with noise, but sometimes I think will you just shut up.

OP posts:
GinaandGin · 24/02/2026 12:44

Hatty65 · 22/02/2026 20:32

Mine is the same, but he's either tapping his fingers on something or he is whistling. He's a good whistler, but like @BeardedBarley DH he gets stuck on things. He once whistled the same four bars of the MASH theme tune (Suicide is Painless) all the way up the A1 from Yorkshire to Edinburgh on repeat. He would whistle four bars, pause for a few seconds and then begin again - over and over. He isn't aware he's doing it and if pulled up on it he looks hurt and says, 'What? I'm not allowed to be cheerful?'

Whistling makes me want to scream
I can't
It's took high pitched and it hurts my ears

HatStickBoots · 24/02/2026 13:27

MrsLizzieDarcy · 22/02/2026 20:35

I have to wear Loop earplugs to sit in the living room with DH. He's losing his hearing and is in complete denial over it so I don't think he realises how much noise he makes. Tapping, sighing, farting, tapping his phone, clearing his throat. The chewing is the worst. It doesn't help that I've got hypersensitive hearing.

I can’t believe this of Mr. Darcy! I can well believe it of that ghastly Wickham however.

Pepperedpickles · 24/02/2026 14:24

GinaandGin · 24/02/2026 12:44

Whistling makes me want to scream
I can't
It's took high pitched and it hurts my ears

I hate it too. It’s so intrusive. Only a man would think everyone else wants to listen to their ridiculous whistling. You don’t get women whistling.

It reminds me of the time we went on a train ride up Snowdon, we got stuck half way up due to bad weather in a packed carriage and the whole ffing time there was a man whistling 😤 ! I was ready to throw him out of the carriage on the way down.

shhblackbag · 24/02/2026 14:26

Yourinmyspot · 22/02/2026 20:13

As said in the title DH is always making some sort of noise he’s either burping, groaning, coughing, sniffing, biting his nails or snoring it drives me mad! I know some of it is me as I’ve never been very good with noise, but sometimes I think will you just shut up.

Gross. How do you contain your rage? I'm so glad I'm single.

Harrietsaunt · 24/02/2026 14:31

If he’s always been like this, you got what you ordered…

Abd80 · 24/02/2026 14:34

Time for separate bedrooms

Zov · 24/02/2026 15:05

CatLovesMeBest · 24/02/2026 09:42

Can I add to the list: suddenly and without warning throwing themselves back in their seat, groaning, with a tortured look on their face, to ‘adjust their knackers’ 😂

'Ooooh! 😖One of me bollocks has twisted a bit funny' DH shouts as he pushes his hand down his trousers and fidgets a bit!

😆

Zov · 24/02/2026 15:05

Harrietsaunt · 24/02/2026 14:31

If he’s always been like this, you got what you ordered…

As many posters have said, their husband was NOT like this when they met! 🙄

Harrietsaunt · 24/02/2026 15:12

Zov · 24/02/2026 15:05

As many posters have said, their husband was NOT like this when they met! 🙄

I was responding to OP who states her DH has always been like this.

Wingedharpy · 24/02/2026 15:22

Zov · 24/02/2026 15:05

'Ooooh! 😖One of me bollocks has twisted a bit funny' DH shouts as he pushes his hand down his trousers and fidgets a bit!

😆

I do hope that's in the comfort of his home and not in the post office queue @Zov .😉

IWishIWasABaller · 24/02/2026 15:26

My husband (and teen son!) is the exact same . Its like they find it actually impossible to be quiet . Coughing burping farting chewing singing humming tapping rustling throat clearing sniffing . They also imitate the accents of people on tv or repeat various phrases they are incapable of sitting silently. My teen daughter is the complete opposite you'd barely even realise she is in the same room as you

HollyhockDays · 24/02/2026 15:27

Same. Drives me mad. Stomping about. Slamming the door. Huffing and puffing. TV on too loud. Chomping his food. Ugh.

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 24/02/2026 15:30

HatStickBoots · 24/02/2026 13:27

I can’t believe this of Mr. Darcy! I can well believe it of that ghastly Wickham however.

Wickham eats with his mouth open.

Benchdogs · 24/02/2026 15:35

Getting that way here. We’re both mid fifties and I’m on my last nerve. Sniffing, sighing, loud gulping (when he drinks) and throat clearing.

The worst is the constant silent burping and then blowing it out to the side as if its cigarette smoke. Absolutely disgusting.

What happened to my perfectly normal bloke?

HatStickBoots · 24/02/2026 18:11

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 24/02/2026 15:30

Wickham eats with his mouth open.

Yes and he talks and laughs while eating and sprays food everywhere.

Climbingrosexx · 24/02/2026 18:17

Blimey, reading all this I will never moan about DHs snoring again 😂

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 24/02/2026 18:40

HatStickBoots · 24/02/2026 18:11

Yes and he talks and laughs while eating and sprays food everywhere.

And he does that kind of 'snorty' laugh.

FordExplorer · 24/02/2026 18:45

Zov · 23/02/2026 22:34

OMG yes, men just HAVE to be heard don't they? My DH is soooo annoying sometimes. I am on my PC, or trying to read a book, and he is watching one of HIS shitty programmes, and does he watch it quietly, and leave me in peace?

Does. He. FUCK. He jibber jabbers all the way through it, and gives me a running commentary. Even though I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT about what is happening. I can't concentrate on what I am looking at or reading because he keeps chatting shit! I have got into the habit of putting my MP3 player on and saying 'I will let you watch your programme. I am listening to my music.' When a lull in the music comes up/a break between songs, I can hear him muttering, and still saying things. He STILL tries to fucking talk. I ignore him. #sorrynotsorry

He often follows me around when I am trying to do something, ANYthing, and keeps talking.. I cannot watch anything I want to watch until he is at work, or has fucked off to bed. Luckily, he gets tired easily, and goes to bed at 9pm most nights. I inwardly cheer when he goes!

I know I sound like I hate him. I don't. We do have some good conversations sometimes, and some laughs, and we go out together for a pub lunch or a breakfast or the theatre or a day trip, and it's fine. And I do enjoy his company SOMETIMES. And we do have TV shows we both like - and watch. But I need my ME time, and to be left alone to read, chill, relax, watch something I want to watch in peace, and just be left alone.

But HE can't be alone, and he won't go out alone. He will rarely go out without me. I go out without him, and sometimes WITH him, but he will rarely go out alone. He struggles to do silence and tranquility. About 80% of the time, he has to fill in every second of silence with SOMEthing. A 'hmmmm,' or a 'ahhhhh,' or a 'humph!' or a 'well, I don't know!' Trying to engage in conversation with me. Grunts, sighs, moans, well well well... Just ARGH!

This is why many women cannot stand their men being at home all the time (and struggled when they were working from home, and also when they retire) because the presence of a man is often just so domineering and loud. They HAVE to be heard and seen, and seem to be unable to sit quietly and calmly. They are like overgrown toddlers.

Not all men of course, but some. It seems to be men who have few friends and almost zero hobbies, and they depend on their wife for emotional support and company, and don't seem to be able to occupy themselves. My dad wasn't like this, but he had a dozen mates, and 4 or 5 hobbies, and spent half his waking hours (when not working) occupying himself with hobbies and interests. My DH and men like him (like many men referrred to on here) rarely go out, and have very few friends.

I look forward to the spring and summer so I can get in the garden and go out for long walks, to get away from him a bit. In the winter I am stuck in (with him jibber jabbering about fuck-all to just fill the silence.)

I do have occasions when I envy women who live alone, but then we have a good laugh and a good time together and I enjoy his company, and realise I DON'T want to be single and alone, I just want him to fuck off out a bit more and give me some time to myself. OR stay in but be quiet for a bit and let me have some peace...

When you’re referring to how you do like him and go on to list all the things you do together, it sounds a lot more like you’re describing a friendship. It doesn’t sound like you’re in love to me…

Gliblet · 24/02/2026 18:55

I don't think it's just men - I have two female colleagues who live alone and who find it very difficult to keep their inner monologue in - but the sheer volume level and persistence men do it with is spectacular.

Like a PP my DH doesn't go out alone much and doesn't quite 'get' that time alone is my equivalent of a hobby night with friends for him.

He sniffs, does this weird grunty-breathing thing, chews his moustache, eats loudly, gives me a running commentary on what he's doing or what we're watching, snores, and when he eats cereal or soup he inhales really loudly like he's trying to suck the food into his mouth so he won't have to lift the spoon all the way up. By far the most rage-inducing thing though is that if DS says so much as one sentence when we're watching a film together, talks slightly too loudly or makes a noise when he's eating DH goes all Miss Havisham on him. Hypocritical twat.

Bonkers1966 · 24/02/2026 18:58

Feck that sounds woeful. I would have hurt 🤕 him by now. You must be a saint.

outofofficeagain · 24/02/2026 19:22

Mine too. He drums too - on the table, his knees. Also talks to himself. You’re absolutely right about taking up space.

Yesterday I was sitting reading a book and he came and sat next to me with his headphones on. Then he started drumming on the sofa. I asked if he was capable of being in a room without making a noise and he had the nerve to tell me that I didn’t have to sit there. YOU’VE LITERALLY JUST COME AND SAT NEXT TO ME

shhblackbag · 24/02/2026 19:32

HatStickBoots · 24/02/2026 18:11

Yes and he talks and laughs while eating and sprays food everywhere.

I actually stopped scrolling 😵 Really hope nobody's husband actually does that. That would be mortifying.

IdRatherBeTalkingTudors · 24/02/2026 19:36

I have a son like this… never stops making silly noises, clapping, humming, tapping fingers, drumming on whatever surface he is near with whatever thing he happens to be holding in his hand, chewing loudly etc. It drives me absolutely mad. I’d very much like to help him overcome this as I am very conscious of how annoying this might become to others when he is older!! It’s already annoying now!! Any suggestions of how to overcome this would be greatly appreciated! He is 12.

Yourinmyspot · 24/02/2026 20:02

It sounds like a lot of them are noisy! The ‘good’ thing for me is I’m quite hard of hearing in one ear, so I I lay on my good ear in bed it blocks the noise out! He sometimes asks why I’m not wearing my hearing aid..

OP posts:
MarxistMags · 24/02/2026 20:15

@CurlewKate that conjures up an image of middle aged men, sat around a table, humming, singing, whistling, burping, farting and sniffling !
Not to mention the groaning when they sit down or stand up....😄