If you post on social media a fair bit, what do you think of people that don’t?

[Lipsaresobloodydry]

Back in the day, I posted on Fb and uploaded photos to Instagram fairly regularly, as most people did. It was nice back then and felt like a community of your friends, to me it doesn’t feel like that now and I last posted on Ig last summer and that was maybe three times that year. I occasionally do stories, but that is rare now, I just feel really odd about posting and am not sure why. I’m a bit sad about it in the sense that I kept as a sort of picture diary to look back on and don’t have that or any memories of this time to come up in the future, which I quite like.
Ive noticed a fair few friends stopped ages ago too, but do know some who post regularly.
If you do, do you assume those that don’t, don’t really have a life?
I’m actually quite liking the idea of becoming mysterious in a way now and giving nothing away.
Does anyone else not really want to post and feels weird if they do?

Hmm, strong response. I said ‘terminally online’ - does that apply to you?

I’m not sure 🤔
I used to post on the grid a few times a week maybe 6/7 years ago, which now seems odd to me!
If I ever go to post or share on a story I hesitate and feel a combination of strange about it/questioning why I’m posting and then a ‘Oh I can’t be arsed’ feeling. I used to enjoy it, now it feels strange. Also now sometimes when I look at friends stories, I wonder what makes them want to post so much, it’s hard to explain!

I haven’t had any social media (other than WhatsApp and fb that I only use for marketplace or the odd group chat) for 5 years. I’m not even old, mid 30s. I’m fairly normal apart from that - have a great social life, plenty of friends & family I stay in touch with. I take lots of pictures. I just don’t feel the need to post them. I honestly don’t care whether people think I have a life or not - anyone whose opinion I care about knows all about my life anyway. I fundamentally disagree with the way society is becoming increasingly more shallow and self-absorbed thanks to social media and I don’t want any part of it. I also like to live in the moment and keep my private life private. Coming off SM was one of the best decisions I ever made. Even when I was on it, I was never a natural. I hated the pressure to post the best pics from a certain event or whatever and hated how my mood depended on how many likes I got. It’s so fucked up. I’m just dreading the time when my (still very young) kids start getting into it and am praying there’s some sort of backlash against it by the time they’re teens

on you. My mental health is fine with it. I love seeing my friends posts about what fun they are having. And responding to calls for sympathy/support too.

No idea. Don’t know what you mean by ‘terminally online’.

I had Facebook in the early days and posted daily abd checked it multiple times a day.
I deleted my account in 2014 when I started to dislike the addictive nature of ‘checking’ my FB, and started to notice the bullshittery and fantasy curation going on (e.g.loved up photos from couples I knew were on the rocks etc.). I also started to get this surreal feeling whenever I posted - like, why am I doing this? Who am I saying this to? What for? WHY?

I have never had any other social media since (other than Linked In for work which I check incredibly infrequently, maybe once every couple of months).

I love the privacy it gives me. Love the headspace I have. Love that I am not expecting see to endless information and stimuli I didn’t choose. And personally, I feel like it has helped me be very clear about who I am and what I stand for. If I feel passionately about a cause, I get involved with it in real life, rather than ranting online or ‘liking’ other people’s comments. If I want to see how an old friend is doing, I call them or arrange to meet. If I’m interested in something, I research it. I find out about ‘new stuff’ in other ways.

Best of all (and this may only apply to me, as I am a sensitive soul!) it has made me realise I don’t need to know what anyone else thinks about me. I don’t need your likes or comments. And I am certainly not interested in the negative feedback of randoms.

I don’t feel I miss out on much, really. I don’t judge others for engaging with social media, especially youngsters who have grown up with it as the norm, but for me, life without it is liberating.

I post sometimes on fb and rarely on Instagram.

So don’t post 🤷‍♀️
But don’t postulate about what every other user might be thinking when they post. Nobody cares what you do or don’t do online.

I don’t ’feel the need’ to post. I just enjoy doing it and enjoy seeing friends’ posts. It’s not making me shallow.

Yes I’ve had that surreal feeling for a while now

People who seemingly can’t eat a single meal without posting a photo of it and who feel the need tell the world every time they have a cup of tea. Commenting on the most prosaic stuff on the planet. No issue with people using it as a diary or to share good times with friends - the latter is how I use it too. But you must know the type of user that I mean? Those that document every minutiae of life.

I still have a FB account and like to see friends and families updates and photos. I just don't bother updating mine anymore.

It was just a discussion….why so defensive, i’m not judging anyone, just interested in the psychology of it I suppose. Why some people do daily, some never etc and why I’ve fallen completely out of love with it slowly the last couple of years

Didn’t say it was making YOU shallow. But society/personal responsibility/what people value, has massively changed since SM became popular. I think teenagers & young people who grew up with it have totally different values and priorities to people who didn’t grow up with it. You say you like posting, why do you like posting?

Nothing about my life ever appears on any social media, anywhere. Ever. I’ve learned the hard way that people aren’t that “pleased” for you when things go well. So I say literally nothing. Why would I need to? I am there, living it, with the people who are important to me.

I post but the life I post isn’t the life I live all the time - for example people would not know about the tough year we’ve had - illnesses across the board, SEN diagnosis… various mental health issues.

I post nice scenery, share poetry (not my own), remember those I’ve lost and take lots of food photos. I rarely post pics of family etc cos it’s not my right.

I don’t have any of those in my friends but I can imagine what you mean. I post things I want to share. Might be a holiday. Might be a nice walk. Might be an exceptional meal 🤷‍♀️
Also a fair amount of political comment. My friends all seem similar.

It’s not defensive. It’s pointing out the obvious - if you don’t want to post, don’t. It’s not that deep.

Because I like sharing things with my friends, it’s just a different way of doing what I’d have done anyway pre social media. And I like their posts for the same reason. DD is 30 and seems to work in a similar way.

That’s really sad. My friends are definitely pleased for me when things go well and sympathetic when they don’t. Not quite sure how this ties in with social media though - presumably your friends know the stuff anyway?

I post daily on Instagram - to me it’s a little diary. I do have a FB account but have no “friends” and only follow my local community group, I joined it in lockdown. I love TikTok but don’t post content on there.

I’m a lecturer and teach mainly digital marketing, so it would be weird not to be engaged in social media, I also manage a local business’s socials as a side hustle.

That’s exactly the stuff I share on social media too. I don’t think you’re remotely the type of user I was describing - it’s people who almost can’t breathe without posting. I don’t have many in my group of friends either - you just don’t know until you link online just how people use socials do you? - and I have definitely cut ties with people in the past who honestly give a running commentary on their day. The cup of tea example was a real one - it was a former babysitter, such a nice person IRL, but my goodness her social persona was exhausting. I don’t want to know you’ve had your third cup of tea this morning Diane! Neither does anyone else to be fair!

I think the people I know who post regularly are so self centred that they’re not thinking about anyone else at all.
I make once exception to that, who is a mum friend who posts multiple times daily about the most minute details of her and her child’s life. He child has lots of health issues and the mum regularly refers to the hospital stays, appointments and her own trauma. I often feel like she’s looking at everyone else on social media leading “normal” lives, and it’s almost like she’s trying to keep up in some way.

I don’t care what other people post on Facebook or Instagram. I only have actual friends and family that I like.
But I only post food and my cats or if I go to cinema/theatre so I can remember what I saw.

I don’t really think about other peoples posting habits tbh. I have people on my FB who only have it to keep up with what my kids are up to (family who live abroad).

That said I only have 69 people on my socials - all family or close friends as that’s what I’ve always used it for, rather than general wider use.