To ban cooking for teenage boys

[Boysfood]

I have 3 teen ds 15,17 and 19.

They cook all the time. Breakfast lunch , I make dinner they then cook in evenings and when getting home. My electric bill is too high.

I’ve asked them to have cereal or toast or instant porridge etc for breakfast. Sandwiches etc for lunch and snacks to be something that doesn’t need cooking. We always have these type of things available but they ignore me and start cooking. I can’t remove the oven etc and they often do this when I’m out or in bed. Only 19 year old works so I can charge him more rent to cover his share but others still in education and I don’t know what to do .

Not necessarily! Some teenage boys eat A LOT!
My 16 yo eats his fill at dinner (leftovers get saved) then later makes a bacon sandwich or couple of toasties.
The older boys have stopped doing that so much in the evening but will often cook themselves big breakfasts and lunches when they’re home. Because they don’t all eat at once it does seem like someone’s cooking all the time.

if they tidy up and don’t eat anything I’ve bought for particular reason I don’t see the problem and am glad they can cook. If they’re hungry it’s a parents job to make sure there is food.
Teenagers definitely cost a lot

It's disrespectful of you to try and control what they eat in the way you're doing. Teenage DC aren't obliged to blindly 'respect' every unreasonable and controlling whim their parent has just because they are the parent.

This can’t be real.

I think processed meat might actually be worse than fried chicken ?

To cook pasta! Less than a quid for at least 3 huge portions!

Tell me you’ve completely missed the point without telling me you’ve completely missed the point…

I will literally be cooking dinner and we will have situations where one wants pasta while waiting or an hour after dinner and dessert cooking protein brownies

Can you clarify what the problem is?

You've said it was cost (electric?) then disrespect, then processed meat?

How much is electric costing? I’d get an airfryer to avoid oven on for one thing.
Those instant oat pots are super expensive and like powder with lots of additives. Surely it’s cheaper to buy big bag bulk oats and then do on hob or microwave. Real oats definitely more filling.
Pasta is cheap and filling for a hungry teen. A sandwich will be more expensive than pasta even factoring in 10 mins cooking.
Def encourage pre planning eg perhaps they could prep a big pasta bake and cook when oven on anyway and then reheat in microwave. Homemade soup if they are wanting hot food.
If you have a smart meter you can see how much costing. Hob should be pennies.

I don't think you can stop it really. I've got 2 boys (21 and 19) and the amount of times I've come home to find they've both cooked pasta separately instead of one cooking for them both. Or they've cooked pizzas at different times so the oven is on twice. It's infuriating.

So?

Necessarily yes.
If they cook full on meals after meal procided, meal provided was not filling for them.
Considering all 3 seem to do like it, it's only logical to assume the meals are not filling

Bought a double airfryer in June and have used oven once since. Home bargains have a decent double one in for £59.99. This is what we use and we have noticed a drop in electricity, and its quicker to cook things.

Pasta keeps for a few days in the fridge, why don't you meal plan with them a few meals that can be pre prepared and batch cook them all together.

We also bought rechargeable sensor lights for the hall stairs and landing, and this has made a big difference too with the electric cause the boys used to always leave the lights on.

Also, heated throw, 3p an hour to run.

I don't know if you wanted further tips on reducing your electricity but every little helps

They didn’t clean up and when I told them they had to my 19 year old just ordered a huge amount of foil roasting trays , takeaway type tubs and paper plates and bowls and said they’ll all use those so I can stop complaining

Not necessarily.

But you're jumping all over the place with the reason you don't want them to cook hot foods.

Why not stick to the cost and perhaps we can help you with that?

Have you considered any of the suggestions so far regarding getting an air fryer, working out the exact cost (or near enough) of the extra cooking, taking more money off them since they can afford to go out and buy all these foods etc?

God I’d be delighted if my kids were cooking for themselves. I doubt it’s costing you that much in energy tbh but an air fryer would be great for them doing meat in if they’re using the big oven and save time too. But given they seem to be buying a lot of the food themselves, it feels very petty to begrudge them a small amount of energy cost 🤷‍♀️ Is it that big a deal?

I don’t think it sounds like you’re trying to control what they eat, more that you’re asking them to be considerate of bills and the message isn’t getting through. Is the issue that:

1. They always cook a hot meal (2–3 x day)
2. They’re cooking additional hot meals outside of meal times (an extra 1-2 x day)
3. They’re not always cooking at the same time so instead of the hob being on once for a cooked breakfast, it’s on three times over? (So 15 x day rather than 3-4?)
4. Are the meals 10min pasta dishes or are we talking multiple pans plus the oven/grill etc for an hour?

If particularly 3/4 is the case then yes I can definitely see why you’re at the end of your tether. They need to learn to plan ahead, team up on cooking so it’s only happening once, batch cook and make extra at mealtimes rather than each of them cooking individually. Maybe look at how much board you’re charging your eldest as well. Do they ever cook for you?

I’ll look at airfryers , I might suggest to my 19 year old he can buy one seeng as he got all their disposable plates etc previously. If I tell
them itll be quicker to cook I’m sure they’ll
think it’s better idea for some things. But not sure how it’ll work for the hob cooking / cooked breakfasts (they usually fry that)

What a weird attitude you have! Your kids are cooking healthy, hot meals for themselves and you have an issue with it? And to top it off you have reduced their pocket money too. So you want them to eat less- is that the message you are sending? Perhaps your food isn't tasty or insufficient to fill them up. Clearly they prefer hot lunch, instead of a measly sandwich.
Have a respectful conversation about cooking- can they share the load with you and cook for everyone thrice a week? Find out why exactly they are cooking again. Perhaps they can cook bigger quantities and then split it across the week.
I find it odd than rather than having a family conversation on how this whole process can be made more efficient, you have resorted to punishment.

Honestly, what's the problem with this? He bought the things. Are they left for you to remove? Otherwise, he found a way to solve your problem.

To me it seems like it could give them quite a distorted relationship with cooking and food. Your treating it like they should be punished for feeding themselves.

I'd feel awful as a kid wishing I could just have some pesto pasta or some nuggets or whatever for lunch but I was barred from using the kitchen.

But yeah I guess don't buy the stuff they use. But even then I can't really see why it is so infuriating for you? Assuming they clean up.

But they’re hungry op!

they are using their pocket money to buy food!
they are cooking it themselves.

your expectations are far too high.

you can worry about what they’re eating but you can’t actually do anything about it unfortunately so there’s no value to worrying.

I think it’s right that they are ignoring you - controlling your kids to not put a pan on the hob for pasta is not on.

I can see that you’re stressed over the costs. Is there any other unexplored avenue to getting more income in?

Yes although it’s very wasteful

And? They eat the food you make, you don’t have 3 children moaning for different meals from you. Outside of that they buy additional food and cook it when they’re hungry. There’s no way the pennies it costs to cook a bit of pasta or a tray of brownies is the real issue, it sounds like you’re just controlling and take it as an insult that teenagers have their own mind and won’t do every little thing you tell them to, particularly when it’s illogical.

Proof that you just want to see problems.