in thinking that its not fair my friend gets more just cos she's a single mum?

[LuckySalem]

I know there's been a few of these but i'm a little peed off with the system.

My friend is getting loads of help whereas me and DP are having to struggle.

I mentioned to her the other day that we were struggling abit and how did she cope? She went onto explain that she's fine as she gets money from work (same amount as DP) gets CTC, Income Support, Housing Benefit, Council Tax Benefit, Child Benefit. She reckoned her average annual income was around £22k a year. Plus whatever her DD's dad gave her which normally totalles about another £200 a month but she coldn't be exact

Now am I being unreasonable in thinking its unfair. She's only supporting her and her DD.

Me, DP and DD are told we can get no more cos we earn too much He earns £14'500 and we are apparently entitled to £75 CB and £100 CTC a month. So £16'600 altogether.

Am I missing something? Is there things we should be claiming that we're not or is this just normal?

Feel free to tell me to shut the hell up if I am being unreasonable.

life is not fair

so you can try and make sure you get everything you are entitled to

learn as much as poss about claiming and then try political approaches

or try and wind down

and swet yourself personal goals and achievements

I understand that but I don't see why that should be the case. I really dont - Maybe i'm just being annoying
The only way we could earn 2 incomes is if I go to work and put her in care constantly and as horrid/selfish or whatever as it sounds I want to raise my child. I wouldn't have had her yet if I'd have looked into it properly and realised this then.

On another note, I worked out what would happen if DP took a day job instead of his night job (only earning £12k) and we would get loads more. LOL. Unfortunatly he doesn't believe he should do that.

The CSA are coming after us for £14,500 in claimed benefits (from her) that the government want back (off us).

dh was giving her £400 quid a month for ten years. She claimed the full benefits entitled to her as a single parent (she left the relationship, not him), and she told the dwp that he wasn't giving her anything. It was all cash, you see! He can't prove it.

Cust - Only have 1 child.

Zippi - I was going to go college in september p/t but can't afford to now, Am gonna have to go to work instead.

Desi - I can't believe they can do that. I can't believe she could do that.

i think you have to look to your own selves and forget comparing it will make you bitter

for one kid
Child tax credit £50.44
Working tax credit current Years Income £82.56

I'm going to make a few presumptions here which may or may not be true.

I'm no expert on benefits and have no idea who should earn what, however presuming that you are able to work but ''choose'' not to, you have the potential for two incomes, your friend does not.

Therefore my first impression is that it makes sense for her to receive more benefits, as a single parent than you do.

total of £133 per week right there

i can't be fucked doing anymore

my take is this

find out hat you are entitled to - properly

go to CAB and stop moaning about it until you aresure beyond all shadow of a doubt that you have your facts.

secondly

you are buying your house

therefore i have little sympathy

you are buying a house.

she isnt

Cust - I'll ring the CTC people and find out where my letter is then. I'll have to check they've got all the figures right.
I did ring them to tell them that we had to put in last years figures, (when I was working) and gave them the updated figures but maybe they haven't updated them?

Do you know whether its worth just claiming everything and seeing what they give us?

Cust - She is buying a house. She's just renting at the moment! Her mum is putting forward half the deposit and she's putting the other half forward.
The only reason she's renting at the moment is cos the housing market is about to crash so it makes sense that she waits for it to happen then gets a cheaper house. (Its what I'd do if we didn't have a house yet)

Whats with the meanness suddenly? How did I upset you?

Ok just read your post about choosing not to work and yes YABU.

I'm not saying get thee to work, or that there's anything wrong with wanting to stay at home to look after one's child during the day but by choosing to do this you are also naturally choosing a lower income and must accept that sacrifice.

Your friend, being a single parent, has no such choice and is limited to one income alone.

if you believe ypou are entitled then claim

i am surprised on your income ypu are buying a house

but then i have no incomew and a mortagae lol

the couci; tax claim has scared me so i dont do that but if you thoink ypu deserve then claim

Aggh, Jesus, girls, that lady is more than capable of doing that.

My poor man was married to her for 12 years, during which they had four kids, whom he adores.

She started staying out late at night, etc., etc., and he was happy for her! Though she deserved a good time, and he happily looked after the kids.

The man she was screwing is a local millionaire whose family own a series of gymns. So one day, she just asks him to leave. Leave the kids, get out, she's not happy any more.

dh, deeply unhappy, leaves the kids, all crying on the stairs, with two plastic bin liners of his possessions. She keeps the house, the kids, everything, and gets to shag the millionare, whom she later marries.

But right up until the week before she marries him (two years ago), she's asking him for money, constantly, over the phone. So he gives her the money.

We live in a council flat. He earns £17K a year, and they want £14.5K from us, to pay for her fraudulant benefits claims.

Pissed off? I don't even know where to start!

Ahh I understand the relevance now Falcon. I was just looking at it as being. She's only raising 2.

Yeh Being unreasonable there then. Ok but.... (yes I know.. lol) how come then does she get so much?

I can understand her getting certain things (now) like the CTC and WFTC and CB. And to some point the council tax and housing benefit.

I don't get the income benefit though - I mnean it takes her earnings up to £22k. Wouldn't they look at that and see she doesn't need the income benefit? or (probably) housing benefit and she'd still live happily?

well you can dob in friend

it depends what your prolem is

if you havent got the working of the system legitimately but mte has then im afraid thats street wise life

Bloody hell desi!! I can understand the angry! What a mean woman!

Zippi - How come the council tax scared you? Is there something scary in it I don't know about? lol

We used to be fine on our mortgage but you know how things are now, cost of living rising, rates on mortgages going up. lol

the fact that if you do it wrong you get a criminal record

Oh I'd never dob her in... She's a friend. Maybe i'm just too honest? Or maybe there's just something there that is allowing her to claim (legitably)

Its just from the way she explained it it didn't seem fair. I understand it better now Falcon took the blinkers off my eyes explained it. Just some things there that doesn't seem right is all.

Oh crap!! Ok thats scary. You get a criminal record even if you fill the form in wrong by accident? (not trying to fraud)

you are very lucky you were able to get a mortgage at all.

it's not a possibility for millions of working poor couples and they are such a low priority for socialised housing they live with all the insecurity and rip-offs that go with private renting.

wel i think you have to either let it go or let her go

or of course calim more your self

i qould guess that as home owners that is the crux of it

That was why we got the mortgage in the end cos living in private rental drove me insane. One flat the electric trip switch was in the papershop downstairs and the cooker tripped it at 6pm the shop didn't open till 8. Was soo annoying. Eating chippy by candlelight. Tropical fish dying Freezer food going soft.

We got our mortgage when the market was good and only managed to get a house in need of HUGE repairs in a scary neighbourhood. We wouldn't be anywhere near to getting a mortgage now and i'm scared as to how we'll cope at all when the fixed rate ends properly.