If your take home pay was 5k a month, would you do this?

[Juso]

Current situation is a single parent (ex does the bare minimum, he’s never even done a nursery run!) and doesn’t pay a penny (constantly out of work and gives me 100 here and there).

My current job is flexible, I can do pick up when I want and get to the office when I want. I can work from home when suits.

Ive been offered a role which requires 9-4 in the office, four days a week. But, it’s 1k a month more after tax. I wouldn’t have to spend more on childcare as dd is already in to 5pm.

I feel so conflicted. Things are ok at the moment but it’s hard to give up the extra 1k especially when you’re ok your own. But I might be making a mistake with being happy where I am and having flexibility. Wha would
you do?

That extra money will melt away with expenses. I worked 9-3 five days a week. The stress when a child was ill, getting back to collect them. I think I'd stay put for now. WFH I would have loved back then.

I would not give up the fkexible job. I’m in a different situation - have a husband but left a very flexible job about a year ago for one like you describe. Pay difference was £85k/year versus £140k/year. It’s not worth it. I am so much more stressed all the time. I feel like im
a treadmill. Going back to old job!

Our finances are not at all tight so would maybe be different if so but you just can’t buy time.

i can’t help but feel that the majority of posters here saying flexibility is the most important are likely not single parents. Financial security is also important. As is progressing career for future financial stability.

single parents with unsupportive Co parents cannot necessarily afford to turn down the extra ££. I say this as a single parent who works full time with no family in the UK to help. I’ve had to pay for limited after school help some years - and could afford to do it because I earned a decent wage.

its true that there are lots of school events, illness etc. many school events I do on work time, then make up an hour or two in the evening. Like everyone else does for dental appointments etc. If your child is ill the world is far more accepting these days of WFH when needed. If the new role can be occasionally flexible when required I would go for it

Childcare isn't longer. It might be worth the extra thousand a month.

I definitely wouldn’t, flexibility is worth it’s weight in gold.
Think of all the long holidays, inset days , the days when child is off sick etc.
I would stay where I am and try and get promoted or overperform to get a raise!

So your current role is 5k a month? Does that comfortably cover your bills etc.

I can only talk from my own experience. If your DD is anywhere near to starting school, I would personally stick with current role which has more flexibility - it seems to get more rather than less hectic when they start primary - clubs, playdates, nativities, parents evenings. There is time for career progression later but those early years are so full on.

Flexibility becomes much more valuable when you move from the nursery years (nurseries run for the convenience of working parents, with full-time hours) to the primary school years (run for the children, and weirdly often seem to assume that there's a SAHP who can drop everything if needed).

As a pp said, there are assemblies, concerts, stay-and-read sessions, nativity play, sports days etc which you won't want to miss. With a flexible WFH job, you can just make up that extra hour in the evening - not so easy from the office with a commute.

And the forgotten snack/instrument/PE kit to drop off. Of course you don't have to, but it's nice for your DC if you can.

Unless this is a short-term move and you expect to have moved on again to another job before your DC starts school, I'd definitely keep the flexibility.

Depends if you need the money? Your mortgage could be 1k or it coukd be 2 or 3? Impossible to say.

If youre managing fine then I'd take the flexibility for now. That is priceless.

X

If you can manage on what you currently earn then I’d stay with the lower paid, more flexible job for this stage of your child’s life. Some things are worth more than money.

“i can’t help but feel that the majority of posters here saying flexibility is the most important are likely not single parents”

On the contrary, I would have thought flexibility is even more important when you’re a single parent with no one else to cover days when the child is sick etc

Go for it. That is still relatively short hours and £1000 is a lot of extra money when you are on your own.

It is roughly an extra £30 per day (after parking). I doubt its worth it. When kids are young they really need to decompress with mum after school/daycare. Its invaluable having that time with them and the flexibility of your current role

Well that depends on the job. most will allow dependents or emergency leave for sick children, so a less flexible job day to day doesn’t necessarily mean no allowances at all for a work-life balance.

my work is not flexible at all with hours but a sick child a parent can take the day off no problem. Either dependents or a/l. Bear in mind parental leave is a thing too, albeit unpaid. If the job pays more generally then a few unpaid days aren’t a problem.

generally as a dept we are supportive of single parents too.

No, I wouldn’t. You’re talking about nursery runs, so presumably your dd is very little. Now are the easy years for working. You won’t have it this easy in primary school and she’ll need you a lot more in secondary.

I found it easy to work long hours when mine were 2/3 and in nursery. But it was hard at 4-11 in primary school. My eldest is a teen and needs a lot of taxiing around to sports training which starts at 4:30pm. I’d hang on to your flexibility and quality of life as you don’t otherwise have much support.

Its not just the cost of the commute is it? There is the extra expenditure of more suitable clothes, makeup etc to work on site. lunches and snacks. Then the time wasted getting to work, getting ready which will bring no benefit. How much of that etra £1000 is going to be of use once the tax man, the garage, the coffee seller etc have got their grubby hands on it?

I’m a single parent and I stand by flexibility when dc are at primary school especially if the other parent doesn’t attend any of the events and is no help in the holidays or school closures or sickness.

I would t swap working from home and flexibility for 1k a month unless you NEED the extra.

You’re right. There are so many children tha notice when their parents are t around all day when they are at school. What a load of tosh.

It wouldn't be worth it for me. Soon, your DD will be wanting you to come to all manner of nativities, class assemblies, book sharing mornings and so on, and you'll wish you had that flexibility.

Flexibility every time.

Primary school so much harder to navigate the timings and book wrap around and holiday care. Not to mention going into school to watch assemblies etc.

I would do it... I would be wanting to be sure I had savings and career prospects.
Not all parenting takes place in the home.

She said it’s after tax, but I agree with your point about increased costs.

Am I reading this right - you earn £5k per month and have full flexibility? I think if youre earning that much you could afford to manage without the extra while LO is so young

I'd be tempted to stick with what you've got, money is nothing compared to things like job security, low-stress environment and a happy kid. You've already got those things.

What are the benefits (pay, pension, holiday, etc) vs extra costs (travel, childcare, commute time) of the new job? Is the job more engaging/interesting? Is it a higher stress position/industry? Is it a rare career opportunity, or is it likely to come around again? What is the probation period, and is it a permanent or fixed term contract?

Don’t do it ! You will fiend your extra 1k on commute and childcare and loose flexibility