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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think France's plan to write to every 29 year old reminding them to breed is patronising nonsense??

189 replies

Designless · 07/02/2026 22:12

Nobody alive is forgetting to do this

A lot of people don't want to because in the modern era it's not necessary and a lot less fun than other stuff

Some people DO want to but can't in which case idk give them the missing tools or funds

But nobody is forgetting

Why does this whole topic seem to bamboozle policymakers so hard?

OP posts:
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Carla786 · 09/02/2026 12:04

LameBorzoi · 08/02/2026 19:45

Birth rates among immigrants drop to national average within generation or so. Birth rates are dropping rapidly worldwide.

Currently, countries like the UK rely on plundering poorer countries for their working age, well educated, amd well off citizens. Like yet another resource to be mined.

Exactly

Designless · 09/02/2026 12:26

Ageing populations are the most peaceful and prosperous. The last thing you want is a bunch of angry young people with nothing to do. Agree with the above that tech and assisted dying are the answers. (I will never understand why so many people want to be forced to spend ten years at the end of their lives in a wretched state)

OP posts:
ScrollingLeaves · 09/02/2026 13:00

Designless · 08/02/2026 09:28

And do you think it's a bad thing if such people don't perpetuate their genius?

Why are you mocking, or being sarcastic, about the intellect of people you don’t know who happen to have wanted a child but couldn’t?

savoycocktail · 09/02/2026 13:05

Designless · 07/02/2026 22:26

I don't care if it's part of a plan to put Frenchwomen on Mars

It's bullshit nonsense

"dear 29 year old we've noticed you're not very interested in nappies and sleep deprivation! Did you know your time to experience this amazing deal is limited?? What's that you say yes you did because you're capable of reading hence your ability to read this letter?"

Are you an anti-natalist?

ScrollingLeaves · 09/02/2026 13:10

JHound · 09/02/2026 09:49

Thanks for the link.

God some people are stupid. Do they think those of us without children simply “forgot” to have them.

In some senses, yes. For quite a few people ‘one day’ turns into too many days and then it’s too late.

JHound · 09/02/2026 13:16

ScrollingLeaves · 09/02/2026 13:10

In some senses, yes. For quite a few people ‘one day’ turns into too many days and then it’s too late.

Not being in a position to have them is not the same as forgetting to have them. Saying “one day” is clearly not forgetting.

I never “forgot”. I just was never in a position to have them.

So that’s that.

ScrollingLeaves · 09/02/2026 13:30

JHound · 09/02/2026 13:16

Not being in a position to have them is not the same as forgetting to have them. Saying “one day” is clearly not forgetting.

I never “forgot”. I just was never in a position to have them.

So that’s that.

Edited

It is a form of forgetting, living for the moment with short term thinking.

Fimofriend · 09/02/2026 13:55

FastFood · 07/02/2026 22:31

I call BS. No one is forced to have a gynaecological examination to get married. All my friends are married and not one, not a single one had to do a medical exam

Yes, I bet it was a fake dossier made by her ex. Good thing that he is an ex.

BruFord · 09/02/2026 15:45

OonaStubbs · 09/02/2026 09:47

AI will do most jobs and many of the babies being born today will never work. Which is why we need highly skilled, highly educated people to have more babies because statistically the children of highly skilled, highly educated people are much more likely to go on to become highly skilled and highly educated themselves and they can go on to do highly skilled, highly paid jobs that contribute taxes that keep the country running.

You may be right @OonaStubbs. AI isn’t a good substitute for jobs that require empathy or creativity though -or dealing with unpredictable situations. So certain roles will still be open.

Vulnerable people born into a shrinking society is worrying. A child with additional needs or MH problems, for example.

JHound · 09/02/2026 16:23

ScrollingLeaves · 09/02/2026 13:30

It is a form of forgetting, living for the moment with short term thinking.

Nope - it’s not a form of forgetting. Words have meaningsz

If you are not in a position to have them you are not in a position to have them. Or planning it as something to do but in future equally does not mean forgetting.

jasflowers · 09/02/2026 18:45

BruFord · 09/02/2026 15:45

You may be right @OonaStubbs. AI isn’t a good substitute for jobs that require empathy or creativity though -or dealing with unpredictable situations. So certain roles will still be open.

Vulnerable people born into a shrinking society is worrying. A child with additional needs or MH problems, for example.

AI is in its infancy, we've no idea how it go or even if it will transform the world, a lot of very large companies could implode if they cannot generate revenue.

Firefly1987 · 09/02/2026 19:06

LameBorzoi · 09/02/2026 02:06

We don't want an increasing population, but the world's population will start to drop in a few decades. Some drop isn't a bad thing, but a preciptious drop could be very problematic.

I'm with the OP that we can't rely on the kids being born today to pay taxes. The young will be the ones needing support if anything at this rate, so many of them already do.

I don't think we really know what will happen in the future or what life will be like. I think maybe we will just have assisted dying as an option for everyone as @BruFord says. I do think we extend life to the absolute max these days and that it's not really to anyone's benefit most of the time.

LameBorzoi · 09/02/2026 21:02

JHound · 09/02/2026 16:23

Nope - it’s not a form of forgetting. Words have meaningsz

If you are not in a position to have them you are not in a position to have them. Or planning it as something to do but in future equally does not mean forgetting.

I intend to do things all the time, and then forget to do them.

When you are you in your late 20s, it's still really hard to believe that any kind of ageing will happen to you.

Making decisions around timing of kids vs career is also really tricky. And when people around you keep saying "so and so had a kid at 42", it gives you a bit of false sense of security.

If egg freezing had been available and reliable when I was in my late 20s, I would probably have an extra child. France's offer won't work for everyone, but it would have worked for me.

JHound · 09/02/2026 21:40

LameBorzoi · 09/02/2026 21:02

I intend to do things all the time, and then forget to do them.

When you are you in your late 20s, it's still really hard to believe that any kind of ageing will happen to you.

Making decisions around timing of kids vs career is also really tricky. And when people around you keep saying "so and so had a kid at 42", it gives you a bit of false sense of security.

If egg freezing had been available and reliable when I was in my late 20s, I would probably have an extra child. France's offer won't work for everyone, but it would have worked for me.

Nobody is talking about forgetting anything - so your example of you forgetting things is of no relevance.

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