To send my SEN child to boarding school abroad?

[Aislyn]

My child is in year 6 and we are facing the local council naming a school which is a disaster for her. They have said already that they will not name any of our preferences. She has an EHCP.

Private school in the UK is completely unaffordable due to VAT. I am feeling aggrieved about potential extra taxation due to SEN. It is only due to SEN that I am having to look at private school for her: she requires small class sizes and strong pastoral support, but is very intelligent.

Private boarding school in Ireland is cheaper than day school here. She has an Irish passport.

I am alternatively considering sending her further afield, where we have family.

Any recommendations for Irish schools?

Yes but upthread I’ve explained that private schools in Ireland do not have the standards of resource for SEN children that some schools would have in the UK, that is all state.

The model is very different to the UK in terms of public/private. Private school teachers are paid from public money which is why they are much cheaper than the UK but they also do not typically have a good record for SEN provision because they are academically focussed.

I am so sorry to hear about this dilemma. I recall an acquaintance telling me a while ago that they were being denied a place for their SEN child at a specialist school local to them. I understand they then found a solicitor who had themselves experienced this issue and with their help and experience they managed to challenge the decision, settlled out of court and the child was admitted to the school.

What does your child want to do?

My ND ds would have fallen apart being sent to boarding school, but I accept that ND children are as diverse as NT children and some would possibly thrive in a more regulated setting.

You genuinely think being sent away from home at 11 years old is better than being with you at a school close to home?

Parents can express a preference but it’s not a guaranteed choice.

Why are you accepting the LA school?

if you have supportive evidence (for small class sizes etc) find a school that will meet need, doesn’t need to be in your borough, and can be independent (whether Sen or mainstream indie) then lodge an appeal at sendist tribunal for that school.

placement at a school is completely different process with an ehcp.

Please don’t do that. I could have cried reading your post.

Is sending your Sen child away to Ireland REALLY the best option for them? Are you able to home educate?

Okay, then you can’t afford it? Like most people.

And what difference does it make if parents or grandparents pay for it?

Surely being at the local school would be better for her than being sent away, all things considered.

Wha reason have the LA given for not making parental preference? Can local schools meet need?
have you a private school in mind? What county are you in?
you should quote section Special Educational Needs and Disability Regulations 2014 : The Special Educational Needs and Disability Regulations 2014 (legislation.gov.uk)
having been there with the LA I feel your frustrations! they backed down after me quoting this at them. We’re in Wiltshire.
good luck!

You might look at the Drogheda Grammar School...
I was there many years ago and it was very much based around strong pastoral support... class sizes used to be around 20... and was very much influenced by the Quaker tradition

why did you have a child if your wanting to send child away? I,ve met adults who went to boarding school and they had a lonely,tormented traumatic childhood and have attachment issues….. mental…

SEN provision is expensive and private schools are all about profit.

I disagree that all private schools are all about profit.

Sorry @Alunayesterday 20.51 , I meant that in answer to a pp.

Is this post real or just a cruel wind up?

Why don't you want to move to Ireland then you can be near to her then.

You make the por child sound like a bit of a nuisance for you.

No way would I have sent my young SEN DC to a boarding school! This must be a joke post but I will respond anyway.

They need their parents and the parents need to do whatever it takes to give a safe and loving home.

Keep fighting for a place, I did. Meanwhile other options, but a young child with issues is going to be terrified.

As I said, don't believe this is real.

Have you looked round local authority specialist secondary schools? If not, do that first-hopefully you’ll find one that meets need an where you think she’ll fit in. Then do mediation with the local authority. If that doesn’t work then go to tribunal. I did this and got my son into the specialist secondary that they initially said he couldn’t go to and that wasn’t appropriate for him (it absolutely was an he’s now thriving there).

I really recommend trying mediation before tribunal. Lots of people see it as a delay tactic from the local authority but it can actually work.

This might be one of the most selfish things I’ve ever read.

No, it is not reasonable to send your SENd child to a different country so you can still work.

Either find the money to put her in a closer school, I’m assuming the job you’re committed to is well paid, or go with her and get a job.

I’m a “career woman” SENd parent, and absolutely value continuing my career too. But there is certifiably no way I would send my disabled child to Ireland so I could carry on with my (admittedly important to me) job. I would resign, in an instant, and we’d all be moving.

No it’s not.

both my kids have asd diagnosis and are required to take Irish.

Haven’t read the whole thread so apologies if repeating but SEN provision in private schools is minimal as thry are usually only interested in high achievers and only want to take on a child like that with some pretty expensive caveats like you paying extra for a TA to be with them so not sure it would work out any cheaper when you add on travel costs etc to going back & forth etc.

We sent our son to boarding school in September, the teachers there picked up something isn't right. Now he has suspected adhd and autism, he is not coping there and we are trying to bring him back but there are no spaces in the better schools around us. We sent him there for the same reasons thinking it would be smaller classes because he is shy but it has bought on more problems for him being away. Maybe wait for the decision on her school to come through or you can home educate using online classes so you don't have to do yourself.

So sorry you and your family are going through this. Aren't there any private school places near you?

It really depends on the school. Not all private schools are highly academic. Some specialise in less able kids, some have high numbers of SEN.