To think perimenopause is an overused buzzword?

[Furning]

My friends and I are mid to late 30s. A lot of them are now claiming they’re perimenopausal, and if I mention I’m hot, or I've forgot something, or cant concentrate, they rush to tell me it’ll be perimenopause.

If they are struggling to lose weight, or forget what they’re saying, or anything at all negative happens, it’s because they’re perimenopausal.

I know some women might be in their 30s, but surely not most? Why is everyone suddenly obsessed with it?

That is exactly what I thought when I read the comment. Drives me mad.

And if one of them was saying she was suffering with the symptoms PPs have described then that would make sense, absolutely.

But it’s having a glass of wine and Jane (aged 35) saying ‘it’s Tommy’s friend’s fifth birthday next week. What’s his name again? Oh I can’t remember, that my perimenopausal brain! Haha.’

Or Lara (aged 38) who’s been trying to lose weight since we were 16 announcing that the reason she’s struggling is because she’s perimenopausal.

Or if I say the restaurant is too hot, it’s ‘that’ll be the perimenopause Furning’.

I’m just hot!

Not symptoms which are causing them genuine misery or distress. Just normal things which are now all attributed to perimenopause.

Why not quote NHS/Bupa websites to them to prove them wrong?

I did once try and gently introduce the idea that it was very unlikely we were all in this perimenopausal ‘club’. I was shot down in flames. We all are. Apparently.

I had huge hormonal changes in my 30s and felt worse than in my 40s. Perhaps it needs a different description other than perimenopause but a lot of women are advised to stop taking the combined pill at 35 when actually you could carry on to 50 safely in most cases. And some have huge natural hormone fluctuations, particularly after having children.

I had both DDs by 33 and was advised to stop taking the combined pill at 35 then had the copper coil fitted then was diagnosed with endometriosis and PCOS at 39 having had IBS, sore vulva/vagina, hot flushes, erratic periods, pelvic pain, pelvic floor issues, weight gain, brain fog, anxiety and depression.

It was much worse and more severe than actual perimenopause, which I hardly noticed, controlled by the mini-pill then back on the combined pill in my late 40s. And being in actual menopause with my own hormones, taking nothing at all and nothing fitted, no periods, zero symptoms aged 50 is absolutely brilliant, I feel 32 again! Except without needing any contraception or needing to worry about periods!

So perhaps it needs a different word but I wouldn't be dismissive of what women might be going through in their 30s. It can be much worse than later in life.

Perimenopause causes so many random symptoms. I remember suddenly scratching my shins until bled, the dryness was perimenopause.I've now got dry skin in my ear canals which leads to ear infection in right ear. Plus usual brain fog etc. It truly affects everything. I was fine until 43/44.

She said the average age of menopause is 50s. She said, if you don't have hot flushes and a changing your period you are not perimenopausal or menopausal.

Your endocrinologist is wrong.

I'm gutted that I didn't experience peri 😅 At age 50 went from having regular periods to full menopause in two weeks thanks to BC 'hormone therapy' 🫠 It wasn't pleasant 😱🫣

Enjoy your peri while it lasts 💪

Tbf it is unlikely, but why do you care? Surely its a good thing that awareness is being raised. It wasn't so long ago perimenopausal and menopausal women were written off as mad and put in asylums.

Try not to let womens health issues being discussed more openly bother you so much.

Strange Im 54 and these things were discussed at length. Even at the age of about 11 we were given a tampax pack and a book " have you started yet?'

And menopuse is a common discussion amongst my peers - although we may be a decade too old for the peri thing

@Thechaseison71 I am a year younger than you and yes we had education about periods in the first year of secondary school in Scotland, I was 12 1/2 and had already been having periods for a year by then.

Menopause though was not discussed. Certainly not in any more depth than "your periods stop and you might get some hot flushes". I am an educated woman with a Masters degree and honestly thought I either had early onset dementia or serious mental illness because I was unaware that my crippling anxiety and depression was caused by perimenopause.

Well menopause wasnt duscussed at school but certainly was amongst older female relatives and obviously friends as we got older.

Ive even duscussed it ( as dud my mum) with my daughters and eldest one is 34

Yes I talk about it a lot with my friends. My mother is one of those people who does not talk about those sorts of things, ever, and told me about periods by giving me a book to read rather than talking to me. She also "doesn't believe" in morning sickness.

Not being able to recall names was, in hindsight, one of my earliest perimenopausal symptoms and actual one of the most distressing.
When i met DH (when i was 33) it took me about 2 years to be able to remember his parents names, despite seeing them regularly. When my DD was born (37 - I was super lucky!) in the depths of hormone crashes and tiredness I couldn't remember what we'd called her, and would panic that the doctors/ midwifes would find out and think i wasn't fit to be a mum and take her off me. On HRT it's much better, but I still have moments where I can be midway through a conversation with someone about somebody else, using the persons name that I'm talking about and then suddenly it's gone, and I know I know it because I know I was just using it, but it isn't there any more. It is really hard professionally and socially too because it's 'rude' to not use peoples names many of whom I have known for a long time, and I feel so embarressed, stupid and brain damaged.

So whilst you're mocking your 'friend' on the internet you might actually want to think about what I've just written and consider whether it is time to step back from these women, as you are clearly no friend of theirs right now.

I think that we go through hormonal changes in our late 30s, but they are not necessarily attributable to perimeno (but obviously, they can be). I definately experienced really high sex drive mid-cycle in my mid to late 30s, plus a resurgence of adult acne, and a change in my periods. This came with mood and behaviour changes, being quite scatty/unpredictable, but also quite wired and assertive. I do remember someone telling me that I was going through the 'last hurrah' of my female hormones and it signalled 'the beginning of the end' with meno just around the corner. It definately wasn't peri tho, which I'm in the thick of right now at the age of 48.

I think there's a huge spectrum of different things at play, every woman's experience will be different.

I started with perimenopause symptoms in my early 20s. Because it wasn’t normal I was fully investigated and diagnosed with a pituitary tumour, prolactinoma.

After this episode I would not be assuming, in my 30s, that the symptoms were perimenopause. In fact I had long periods of time not taking the meds needed to treat the adenoma and would know when my prolactin levels were increasing by the symptoms. It was treated symptomatically under advice of my endocrinologist. I’m now post meno and my levels are very low but I still see my endocrinologist yearly because the menopause hasn’t stopped the tumour. I take Anastrazole post breast cancer which now suppresses the tumour. I couldn’t use this pre menopause because it’s a hormone blocker. It is far more effective than the drug used pre menopause. Hopefully when I stop taking it later this year the tumour stays dormant.

Davina Mccaul has gone very quiet re advocacy about perimenopause. Her diagnosis of brain cysts, present from birth, are likely the reason that she had an early perimenopause symptoms and struggled with HRT that didn’t work as well as it should have done. Had they not pushed the perimenopause diagnosis so hard she may have had her brain cysts diagnosed earlier. Now she has breast cancer, so has become another statistic that HRT advocates continually play down.

Anyone who feels that they are in perimenopause in their 30s should have other causes ruled out before accepting perimenopause as a diagnosis. Many women go undiagnosed with endocrine disorders and some of the more silent cancers because their symptoms meet perimenopause criteria. A friend died of endometrial cancer because it presented as perimenopause. By the time her symptoms suggested a more serious cause it had spread to her pelvis and hips so she died in agony, too late for any form of treatment other than morphine.

The obsession with HRT and perimenopause is seriously detracting from proper diagnosis and investigation.

Until you experience the true menopause it’s difficult to identify symptoms. If you are not quite sure then it’s unlikely to be menopause.
I had very vague symptoms throughout my 40s. A bit of muscle ache, tiredness and brain fog but these could easily be attributed to just the stresses of life and basically normal aging process.

Perimenopsuse hit hard in my early 50s primarily with “dragon” moods, and was the reason I started HRT. I had the odd hot flush but it wasn’t until I came off HRT ( suddenly, so cold turkey) due to breast cancer that I experienced the night furnace to cold store effect. Fortunately is was over in a matter of weeks.

I take Anastrazole for breast cancer. I take it in the evening and I have one hot flush every night about an hour after taking the tablet. I presume this coincides with the meds hitting my system and my oestrogen ( whatever is left) plummets. Fortunately it’s just the one and if I remember to take the meds early evening it doesn’t interrupt sleep.

But even the mild hot flushes I experience are significantly worse than feeling a little flushed in the few days pre menstrual. The few weeks after I came off HRT were entertaining. It was November and my DH kept finding me sat in the garden trying to cool off. If it wasn’t for the neighbours I’d happily have stripped off to just my knickers at their height. Now it’s just throw off the covers for 30seconds. True hot flushes are like being locked in a blast furnace, taking your coat off does nothing.

I’m really glad that menopause is starting to be taken more seriously and most women know they don’t just have to put up and shut up.

On the other hand, some caution should be advised because symptoms might not be perimenopause and it’s best to get them
checked out. I spoke to a GP about my slightly annoying ailments, thinking she’d say it was anxiety or peri menopause. She ran a series of blood tests and I have a thyroid issue.

It seems that women can't win either way. If you are 40-55 every symptom is automatically dismissed as perimenopause/ menopause and if you are < 38 classic menopause symptoms are dismissed and you're treated as a hypochondriac/'stressed'.

I think it’s mainly because it’s actually being discussed so women now understand what is going on with their bodies.

My sister is 39, I’m 40. She is perimenopause (confirmed by doctors) I am not. She has polycystic ovaries and other things which they believe have attributed to this.

I suppose there are that many symptoms that even if it is something else it also fits for peri menopause.

So she doesn't realise that the average age of your progesterone beginning to decline is 35( a big reason why fertility is deemed to decline from that age also)? Why would it take ten+ years before the symptoms of that start to show up in most women?
Many of the women with the other symptoms do have changes in their periods also whether that be they are lighter/heavier, more/less frequent, shorter/longer but tbh most of us just get on with that part of it unless we physically can't due to level of pain or amount of blood loss.
My only symptom of peri was periods skipping every second month, most doctors would dismiss that as 'one of those things that happens after a baby', I've nevrr had a hot flush and I was post menopausal by 37

Ok you know more than a post menopausal female consultant endocrinologist of over 30 years experience at one of the best hospitals in the UK if not the world.

Of course you do.

I know that perimenopause is more than changes in your menstrual cycle and hot flushes.

My blood tests - ordered by a gynae consultant - confirmed i was perimenopausal way before I had hot flushes and changes in my cycle.

Your endocrinologist is very woefully and categorically incorrect.

I know a lot of perimenopausal women, it'sa big issue in fitness because it affects health and fitness outcomes and we can do a lot fitness wise to improve womens symptoms.

Maybe your mates just don't understand biology, who knows, or maybe they do, and they really are perimenopausal, but you're diminishing their experience because you personally haven't suffered any ill effects from it yet.