****TMI************* alert, do NOT read if easily offended by smutty talk, in fact, even if there is a remote chance of offence, or if you are eating

[lucyellensmum]

So,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,AIBU, to ask my DP to go down on me later when i know there is a good possibility im going to start my period??

I know its gross, but i just get SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO horny when im due on, and im desperate

LEM wonders how long it will be before the thread is deleted

Second hymen it is then, "oh my god, you are so BIG" lmao

i just cooked him an omlette, couldnt be arsed to eat myself so thats two glasses of wine on empty stomach, so...........nah, can't be arsed now

Pinktulips you may have just ruined blowjobs for my dp forever. eww...

well that snippet of info made me too squemish to do them more than every 6 months or so so i thought i should share the joy

i quite like the taste of the precum though, its all sweet and sticky, um, hic.......i knew i should have eaten before starting drinking

LEM, I do admire your frankness, you've got balls, but you may start to regret this in the morning...

Saturday nights on MN, utter filth.

tis nearing the full moon you see......

If he's anything like my Dh he will be so fecking pleased to be invited to go down there nothing will stop him

why on earth would LEM regret this? Unless you mean cos she was typing instead of thigh-hugging man-face

Make sure you insert some vodka and peppered worceseter sauce prior to any cunnilingual action and your man will have sensual and sensational party with a Real Bloody Mary!

I have just spewed herbal tea at my screen reading that, QS!

I nominate for quote of the week.

seconded

thriced

quatrroed ! PMSL

quintupletted

What I want to know is if LEM got any joy last night, and if she followed my advice....

I fell asleep

I fell asleep

This is an ace thread.

Lem
Great thread!

Great Thread!!!

I am embarrassed to be selling a product called jam Sponges though - I wanna put up a disclaimer saying "I didn't name them!!!"

For future reference though, you could always get an instead - like a disposable moon cup you can wear during period sex

Did you mean to say the side down, km?

yes yes, i did indeed - i do that all the time, i send him naughty texts all day, only to snore on the sofa like a heifer. Hey ho

The irony being that there was no sign of the great red dragon!