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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel our quality of life in the UK gets lower every year?

548 replies

Playingvideogames · 01/02/2026 17:17

Off the back of another thread where I mentioned my childhood homes being bought by my parents for under 300k in the late 90s/early 2000s, and are now all selling for 700k+.

I feel like our quality of life just dwindles every year. Everything becomes more expensive. Housing is low quality, small and extortionate. The weather is awful 70% of the time. Everything feels so overcrowded with fewer green spaces and natural beauty as more housing estates go up. The roads are awful, choked with traffic and potholed. Constant roadworks here yet nothing ever seems to get solved. Customer service is a bit rubbish, nothing really works as intended. More and more rules about what you can and can’t do. People just seem stifled and stressed.

I’m sure people will rush along to say how wonderful the NHS is and similar, but I sometimes feel really envious of people living in places where (although not perfect) they have something reliable to enjoy - great weather, a nice big house, just more space and less overcrowding.

I don’t think I’m being unreasonable but I wonder if you do!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
Jideom · 01/02/2026 20:20

We are thinking of moving to somewhere in the GCC. Life there is really good.

Crystalovertherainbow · 01/02/2026 20:26

YourJustOrca · 01/02/2026 19:49

I agree, I’ve travelled a lot and think we have a pretty good deal in UK. The OP sounds like a half empty person.

She sounds like someone who has left their soul empty of anything of value and put all her value into money, houses, cars and objects, what a dead end in life

CheshireCat1 · 01/02/2026 20:27

Playingvideogames · 01/02/2026 19:22

Surely you understand that’s a totally separate issue from what’s being discussed here?

Oops, my mistake I thought your post was about the quality of life not the quality of living standards. We all measure our quality of life differently.

Jesuismartin · 01/02/2026 20:29

LunaDeBallona · 01/02/2026 20:18

You find it totally infuriating?
I find it totally infuriating that despite allegedly taking control of our boarders we have more and more undocumented men arriving here who are (some, not all ) committing heinous rapes/assaults and murders.

Im appalled that these men are being given private health care unlike the rest of us who just have to pay for it and sit on waiting lists.
Im furious that despite offering a referendum we are in this shit because politicians haven’t executed Brexit as it should have been. None of the ones in charge believed in it which is why it was so terribly cocked up.
Every politician is in it for themselves.

Yes @Playingvideogames I think it’s awful here in so many ways. I don’t go to ‘events’ any more because there are just too many people. Everywhere is crowded. The NHS is an utter disgrace because there is no accountability for its 1.125million members of staff.
Huge swathes of people are being forced to go to university and get into massive debt in order to have a career that doesn’t need educating to degree standard.
We expect our elderly relatives to live incredibly long lives but have no intention of looking after them. State Pensions will be non exsistant by the time my daughter retires- unless you are a civil servant of course when you will get a huge pension that the rest of us have to pay for. Even if you make a huge error (looking at you lying Midlands police chief) you can retire early without damaging your financial payoff.
I despair the way the country is headed.
People wearing masks parade through London in the ‘peace marches’ which anyone with a brain can see are hate marches - nazi salutes, death to the idf, terrifying Jews, costing us a fucking fortune, police turning a blind eye but god help you if you say anything about men dressing as women, or the danger of unwanted illegal immigrants as the left turn on you screaming ‘fascist, Nazi etc and try to get you sacked.
I hate Kier Starmer crawling on his belly to the Chinese - they must be laughing their heads off at us ‘Yes of course Mr Ping you can build your huge embassy in the middle of our capital city so you can better spy on us and fuck the country up further’.
Theft, shoplifting, assaults, rapes , bloody green taxes, pandering constantly to minority groups - but fuck the rest of us. Banged up for saying something on X but not investigated for raping children if you are a Muslim. Too many MPs who care deeply about Gaza but don’t call out raping gangs here on their doorsteps.

Our quality of life gets worse every year - we are just pawns in the government’s game.

I’m surprised people thought Brexit would help control illegal immigration.

canuckup · 01/02/2026 20:33

It seems fine if you have a lot of money

For the middle/lower income, not so much

Jideom · 01/02/2026 20:35

Jesuismartin · 01/02/2026 20:29

I’m surprised people thought Brexit would help control illegal immigration.

They wanted legal immigration to fall. There was the risk of turkey joining the EU, a lot of eastern Europeans as well and the fear many of the left wings states giving refugees citizenship and then them having rights to come here.

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 20:37

My quality of life is fantastic… when I’m in America. The space, outdoors lifestyle, natural environment and quality of health service despite the expense, are incredible. The time that I spend in America I feel healthy, active, motivated and happy.

The time I spend in the UK is miserable. It is an utterly shit country, with absolutely nothing going for it. I spend every minute I’m here waiting to go back. When I’m in the UK, I feel unhealthy, demotivated, depressed and I have a cloud of permanent brain fog hanging over me.

123123again · 01/02/2026 20:40

Absolutely.
But things were improving after the war in the 59’s and 60’s and then were really shit economically in 70’s An 80’s sea change .
Things carried on getting better until the mid 2000’s then declined. We are where are now.

I wish people would stop moaning and say what they want to see. Where I live is awash with money. Its poor management.

BurntBroccoli · 01/02/2026 20:40

Did you feel this way in the 90s and early 2000s?

lazybone1 · 01/02/2026 20:42

I didn’t, I had hope then. Wish I had been old to buy property then though!

suburburban · 01/02/2026 20:45

BurntBroccoli · 01/02/2026 20:40

Did you feel this way in the 90s and early 2000s?

So much better then

Tony Blair and free movement have a lot to answer for

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:49

Playingvideogames · 01/02/2026 17:17

Off the back of another thread where I mentioned my childhood homes being bought by my parents for under 300k in the late 90s/early 2000s, and are now all selling for 700k+.

I feel like our quality of life just dwindles every year. Everything becomes more expensive. Housing is low quality, small and extortionate. The weather is awful 70% of the time. Everything feels so overcrowded with fewer green spaces and natural beauty as more housing estates go up. The roads are awful, choked with traffic and potholed. Constant roadworks here yet nothing ever seems to get solved. Customer service is a bit rubbish, nothing really works as intended. More and more rules about what you can and can’t do. People just seem stifled and stressed.

I’m sure people will rush along to say how wonderful the NHS is and similar, but I sometimes feel really envious of people living in places where (although not perfect) they have something reliable to enjoy - great weather, a nice big house, just more space and less overcrowding.

I don’t think I’m being unreasonable but I wonder if you do!

I would disagree mainly with the weather point. Yes, UK weather can be grey & dismal, but compared to large parts of the world where it's often extremely hot, extremely cold, at risk of earthquakes, tornadoes, tidal waves etc, it's pretty good. Look at the rest of the world - in the US there's tornadoes and forest fires, Poland and Eastern Europe are cold, NZ, Japan & others have earthquakes, Australia is extremely hot....

To me, the main selling point of the UK weather is that it's moderate.

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:50

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 20:37

My quality of life is fantastic… when I’m in America. The space, outdoors lifestyle, natural environment and quality of health service despite the expense, are incredible. The time that I spend in America I feel healthy, active, motivated and happy.

The time I spend in the UK is miserable. It is an utterly shit country, with absolutely nothing going for it. I spend every minute I’m here waiting to go back. When I’m in the UK, I feel unhealthy, demotivated, depressed and I have a cloud of permanent brain fog hanging over me.

Can I ask which state of America you're in?

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:52

aLFIESMA · 01/02/2026 19:28

I count these as blessings, for which I am thankful not just for myself but for my precious family, friends and everyone else!

Yes I agree!

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 20:52

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:50

Can I ask which state of America you're in?

Mainly Florida, but often Texas And South Carolina.

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:56

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 20:52

Mainly Florida, but often Texas And South Carolina.

Interesting. I know a little about Florida but understand it's a nice sunny place..

Otoh I understand gun crime is a significant issue there, with 3200 deaths yearly (assuming the state I saw was true). Is this an issue? Obviously this will vary by area I know...

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:58

Playingvideogames · 01/02/2026 20:17

But we’re not comparing our quality of life now to 60 years ago, we are comparing it to ‘comparable’ countries.

Which countries do you think are comparable and doing better?

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:59

Crystalovertherainbow · 01/02/2026 20:17

the whole of Europe is still the best place to be.

Agree!

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 21:00

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 20:56

Interesting. I know a little about Florida but understand it's a nice sunny place..

Otoh I understand gun crime is a significant issue there, with 3200 deaths yearly (assuming the state I saw was true). Is this an issue? Obviously this will vary by area I know...

Just like I’ve never seen knife crime in the UK, I’ve never seen gun crime in the states. I’m not denying the issue. But fortunately it hasn’t impacted my life.

All three of those states are sunny and hot. There is a lot to do outdoors. I go back at the end of the week, thank goodness.

GingerBeverage · 01/02/2026 21:01

Are British children born now, going to have better lives than their parents?

Carla786 · 01/02/2026 21:02

Chrispers · 01/02/2026 18:46

11%? Holy shit. That is a lot of developed land. Never ever to be reclaimed by nature. You do realise we don't have an unlimited amount of land right?

We should have less sodding people not more sodding houses. I hate the attitude just build more. Hideous ambition .

We should limit the number of houses you can. Many London houses are owned by people abroad who don't live in them

Crikeyalmighty · 01/02/2026 21:04

Tonissister · 01/02/2026 17:34

Some really crucial things are getting worse. But a lot is far better.

People's expectations went through the roof in 1990-2010s.

I grew up in the 1970s and 80s. No central heating. No car. No phone. No social media or computers, obviously. Very rarely new clothes. My shoes got glued or had new tips put on them if I outgrew them. For your birthday, a main present would be one LP of music or a sweater or coat that you needed anyway. Without a car, we never got lifts anywhere, so we walked everywhere, in rain, hail, snow, miles to school, to friends' homes, or very late at night back from parties or clubs in our teens.

To buy basics like clothes and shampoo, I had a job after school and on Saturdays from age twelve.

NHS had far less calls on it then, because people had less access to information and much lower expectations. No one sued the hospital if someone died post surgery. It was just life.

Far fewer people owned a home or expected to. Or went to uni or expected to.
The food was bland. Racism was rife. Life expectancy was far lower. Neurodivergence was just laughed at. Dyslexics were thickos, autistic people were weirdos, ADHD sufferers were lazy or naughty. Sexism and sexual predatory behaviour was totally normal and it was never the men who were blamed but the young girls who were ridiculed as sluts. Domestic violence was not tackled by police. Rape in marriage was legal. Homosexuality was an aberration. Having children outside of marriage was such a social disgrace, that perfectly capable women were forced to give up their babies for adoption.

We came a long way. And now we are back sliding. For me, the mix of outrageous house prices and very low wages/zero hours/job insecurity these days is a moral and societal disgrace that no leaders seem to have any commitment to overturning. But a lot else is far better.

Edited

I agree on this , many things are far better , but other things are worse, lack of good social housing, rents out of control ( particularly in south and more in demand areas elsewhere) far less job security and yes as you say much higher expectations all round because social media and even forums such as mumsnet gives you a peek into other people’s lives- it seems quite common on here that very average earners often expect to be buying 4 bed detached homes even quite young and having decent regular holidays as well as having kids etc -

Jideom · 01/02/2026 21:07

24kPalamino · 01/02/2026 21:00

Just like I’ve never seen knife crime in the UK, I’ve never seen gun crime in the states. I’m not denying the issue. But fortunately it hasn’t impacted my life.

All three of those states are sunny and hot. There is a lot to do outdoors. I go back at the end of the week, thank goodness.

Edited

We thought about America many years ago due to the higher salaries. I so wanted to go to Texas and Florida during COVID because they refused to lockdown and kept stuff open.

Eskarina1 · 01/02/2026 21:07

telewubbies · 01/02/2026 18:06

I don’t drive and feel so embarrassed about it sometimes as people are like “you don’t drive !” But at the same time I kinda like the fact I’m one less person on the road

Me too. I firmly believe driving should be reserved for those who are good at it, with excellent public transport because more people would use it. I'm not a confident driver so I don't drive.

FellowSuffereroftheAbsurd · 01/02/2026 21:08

I don't think it's unreasonable to feel that way, even if that's not my experience. A lot of people are going through a hard time, and frankly, it's very British to complain about Britain.

Oh, and I live in the East Midlands in a home bought for about £120k about 5 years ago, a home that is already adapted for disability due to the previous owner which was a big reason for the choice - getting that in a rental when our previous landlord refused to fix boiler for years wasn't going to happen.

But I don’t have special educational needs. With the greatest respect, these sorts of ‘positives’ aren’t the kinds of positives I’m referring to. I mean general yardsticks of quality of life that apply to most people.

You entirely missed the poster's discussion around improving public infrastructure (new playground), people volunteering and improving survival rates.

Literally anyone can become disabled. The only thing between you and a disability, is luck and time, and issues being identified earlier vastly improves quality of life - that does ripple out to most people in society, most people will know someone who directly benefits at some point. Many mothers on here are only alive, only have children alive, because of that.

I’ve had weather warnings, flooding and high winds for 2 weeks solid.

Most weather warnings are from weather events that hit other areas far worse.

I grew up where tornado seasons lasts for month and winter typically involves snow stacked above my height and weather induced power outages are still the norm. British weather may not suit postcards, but I enjoy it where I am most of the time.

Good grief, unless I love the UK and think it’s fabulous then I’m a miserable person?

You don't have to love it - but if someone lists what they enjoy, and you call them all 'absence of negatives, not the presence of a positive," then yeah, it comes across as deep in misery - like you simply can't see the joy in something someone else does.

But we’re not comparing our quality of life now to 60 years ago, we are comparing it to ‘comparable’ countries.

Are we? The title is discussing how the quality of life is decreasing over time n the UK - not in the UK compared to other countries. There is nothing in the original post about other countries either.

And coming from one of those apparently wonderful countries according to others on this thread, I'm much happier in the UK.

I’m surprised people thought Brexit would help control illegal immigration.

Or immigration at all. Non-EU migration has always been significantly higher than EU migration. It's also been a money maker for so many, includes those in government bringing in 'private partners' to deal with migration paperwork for a fee that started with non-EU migrants.

But Remain politicians refused to discuss any potential changes UK could do while in it or really engage with people for what they thought was an easy win for the status quo - and were very, very wrong in ways that impact them very little compared to everyone else.

Just like I’ve never seen knife crime in the UK, I’ve never seen gun crime in the states.

The US has higher knife-related homicides and comparable crimes per capita as well compared to the UK as well. The only stats that put the UK higher are ones where there is no comparable crime are included, particularly around arrests/convictions for possession of certain types of bladed articles that have no laws against them in the US.