Child reading while mother on social media

[SuperGinger]

I saw a mum on the tube with a small boy, he was doing his reading to her, she was not listening at all, just doom scrolling through rubbish on Instagram. He would finish a page and she didn't notice (until about 10 seconds had passed, during which he just sat there), she would then turn the page.

I know that listening to your small child reading can be boring but AIBU to think she should try to pay attention and be present? It is setting a bad example to her child and is disrespectful and frankly sad.

Then on the Today programme they are discussing the negative impact of phones on children and how helpless parents feel, but you read what you sow.

So true,exactly what I mean though.Sometimes parents can't win.

Poor kid. I would’ve raised an eyebrow too OP. Scrolling in a conversation is always rude but scrolling while someone you care about / your kid tries to interact is simply bad parenting

I'm neither jealous nor intimidated.

Was she definitely doom scrolling?! There’s all sorts I do in my phone in the presence of my children including booking school dinners, clubs, banking, insurance etc etc.

Also, just for the record I read to my kid every day, read every day myself, buy them any book they show an interest in and they barely read themselves! I’d have loved them to have shared my love of books but they don’t and not for lack of trying!

How do you know it was last minute! You don't. My son used to read his school books constantly, by the next day he knew them off byheart. After hearing them for the 20th time I used to tune out as well it didn't make me a bad mum. I helped him the first 10 times untill he was confident. You saw a split second of their life.

"Done" the day before? I judge someone who thinks that reading is something that should only be "done" to tick a box a lot more than a mum who is scrolling her phone whilst her child reads. If it was one of the school phonics books, they are deathly boring. He was reading, that's a positive thing. Whether she was listening is secondary to that.

“great Dads”? As opposed to bog standard mothers who do the vast majority of this work. Dad’s who perform a minor act of parenting are of course “great”.

Did you also teach your children to make mindless judgements based on a two minute observation in the morning? If they read half so much as mine she had probably heard the reading 50 times already or the child was galloping ahead.

But always safest to assume a mother is in the wrong.

My advice, just worry about yourself.

you have no idea what the circumstances are here. YABU to judge, avert your eyes.

how sad.

Yabvu. Don't you have a book to read on your journey rather than judging?

My strange old cat loves looking out the bedroom window in the morning and late at night and sometimes I sit with her for a few moments for a fuss. We sometimes see the local parents go up a road opposite me as it's a short cut to the local school.

I've seen a mum, same one a few times, on her mobile on the way and from the school. Drops her oldest, then walks back with her pre-schooler. All the time on her mobile. Her youngest just walks quietly, looking down most of the time, no communication between them.

Yeah, may be jumping to conclusions and I get if she's working, checking on emails etc is important, but the walk with my mum was my fav time, chatting about all sorts and what we saw around us. Just think it's a little sad that the phone (for whatever reason) trumps about 10 mins of chatting time with the kids.

I'd be surprised if she could hear him on the tube.
It's incredibly loud.
Also this thread is hilarious.

Way to judge that mum!
We have our entire lives on our phones these days - paying our bills, banking, food shopping, clothes shopping, NHS appointments, medication ordering, school communication and much more.
How do you know that mum wasn't sorting very important stuff out on her phone whilst also juggling childcare issues (ie her son being with her and not at nursery today)?
She could have been negotiating contracts, finding a suitable place to live, paying bills, ordering food for later - anything.

What you failed to point out was that the child was not neglected or ignored. He had a clear visible aid for his time spent travelling on the train that had obviously been provided by his mother. He could also read - which takes a lot of teaching and patience from parents.

Don't be so judgy.

Won't allow me to edit my comment, but I can see that you later added that the child was on his way to school. I had initially assumed "small boy" meant nursery age.

You should have. Then she could have told you to mind your own damn business.

But desperately keen to virtue signalling about how much better you are than her. Quality.

Butt out.

I blame the dad. He wasn't even wearing make up.

That's sad that the boy had no hands to turn his own pages.

I agree with you. It’s terrible behaviour. I don’t care if people say she’s stressed or busy.
You are going to school and you should engage and chat with your child. Poor kid.

Do you know she was definitely doom scrolling? There are times I probably look like I’m ignoring my children as they’re speaking to me and prioritising my phone. Which isn’t the case, I am usually reading or replying to emails, double checking appointments, ensuring food shop substitutes are ok etc. All of which are pretty important. Oh and most likely wearing make up also 🤣🤣

Or should we forget our own needs and wants as a person, sack off work stuff or even the food shop cos someone judges based on a snippet? I wish you did approach the mum so she could tell you to stay in your own lane to your face.

Yes, unless OP was sat next to this lady then she has no ide what she was looking at her on her phone.
Her thread is full of assumptions, so assuming she was doomscrolling on Insagram makes sense.

Who the fuck looks at what other people are doing on their phone anyway? Get a life!

I remember once I was in town with DC, both pre school. It was three in the afternoon and i suddenly realised I hadn't eaten a thing all day and felt a bit faint. I'd been so busy feeding them healthy food for breakfast and lunch, and taking them out to parks and music. So we stopped in a cafe. I ordered some lunch and bought them a packet of pom bears to share between them while I focused on my food. The glares I got from the woman at the next table. I could tell she thought I was a selfish appalling mother, half-starving my children on cheap crap and ignoring them while I feasted. It made me careful never to judge anyone from a single occasion.

Buy yourself a book to read. Keep you busy instead of deciding how others live and making massive assumptions on strangers - Wierd.

Wow so judgy, oh to be so perfect hey!