Neighbour just rung doorbell at 2.30am!

[greywolfie]

I'm now wide awake and fumming. She rung twice so I opened the front bedroom window as I worried it might be an emergency. Women stood there on her phone in tears and I thought - oh, she could need help.
My husband is on his way down to.open the door.
Then she says...."my cat is in your garden"
I mean - FFS!
I said "well your cat will get out of our garden"
"Really?"
"Yes. If your cat is still in our garden in the morning we will bring it back"
Shut window.
Husband then opened the door and she started telling him about the damn cat- I yelled at him to shut it.
He wanted to go out and get it but I said that was mad and would encourage the over protective cat mother to do it again in future.
For reference, we have 2 elderly cats that very rarely scale the fence. One night one got over very late and was struggling to make it back (we have stuff by our fence that would've also helped her bloody cat up, if he cared - but their side is just the bare fence). I was a bit worried but would NEVER have rung their bell in the middle of the night! About an hour later our old lady regained her energy and made it back.
AIBU to go round in the morning and point out you don't ring people's doorbells for this reason? It's batshit right?

I’m with you OP. I would be livid if someone woke me up at 2.30am for some ridiculous reason. I find it difficult to go back to sleep once woken up, this would really upset me

I absolutely cannot stand cats. Cannot bloody stand them.

But I agree with you, and although I won'tlike being woken at 2.30am for for a sodding cat, I couldnt not empathise with a distressed worried owner who loves the stupid thing and wants it home safe and sound. Presumably there is some reason it shouldnt be out otherwise she wouldnt have been so distressed.

If it were happening on the regular with 2.30am nightcalls then that would be different.

This is very well said. There is a risk that one day cat lady's behaviour will end up pissing off someone far, far less kind than the OP, and find herself in real trouble. Nothing at all kind about encouraging what sounds like a potentially vulnerable woman to wander the streets and disturb people late at night.

I am a cat Mum, and I would not be ringing my neighbours doorbell at 2.30 am to say that my cat is in their garden!!! It may be that her cat is supposed to stay in at night, but perhaps wouldn't come in before she went to bed (cats don't generally do as they're asked!)? Even if that is the case, ringing door bells at that time of the night is a massive No. You only ring a neighbour's door bell at 2.30 am if it's a genuine emergency.

You did the right thing by saying to your husband to leave the cat. Unless it's distressed, injured etc, then it will get out of your garden (after all it got in!). You don't want to encourage this behaviour.

I'm confused about why she was so worried that the cat was in your garden.

What does she mean, it doesn't 'understand' gardens?

Does she even know what a cat is? It's the most normal cat behaviour for them to wander around and go into other gardens, unless it's meant to be an indoor cat and somehow got out.

Tbh I'd be a bit concerned about her ability to look after the cat if this is just a normal cat with no health concerns etc. It's just doing what cats do.

Is your neighbour vulnerable or unwell in some way?

On a school night! YANBU, why did she suddenly realise her cat was in your garden. She's neurotic.

I am a cat Mum, and I would not be ringing my neighbours doorbell at 2.30 am to say that my cat is in their garden!!! It may be that her cat is supposed to stay in at night, but perhaps wouldn't come in before she went to bed (cats don't generally do as they're asked!)? Even if that is the case, ringing door bells at that time of the night is a massive No. You only ring a neighbour's door bell at 2.30 am if it's a genuine emergency.

You did the right thing by saying to your husband to leave the cat. Unless it's distressed, injured etc, then it will get out of your garden (after all it got in!). You don't want to encourage this behaviour.

Your neighbour is totally out of order. Do you have a ring? Get rid of your door knocker install a ring and set it to silent at night. She doesn't sound quite right mentally.

oooh a fummer! I've not seen real fumming on MN for an eon. 😍

OP, she's probably got MH issues like extreme anxiety. Does she indicate that in her other behaviour? If I'd been woken at that ungodly hour I think I might have gone to get the bloody creature since I was awake anyway (for all you know her cat's unwell/indoors cat) and my neighbour was clearly upset enough to do something this batshit. I would have followed it up with a chat or note explaining how unreasonable it was to wake someone at 2.30 if nobody is actually bleeding from the eyes.

@CinnamonJellyBeans you sound ridiculous

This person backs on the the OP so isn’t technically a neighbour. A ‘missing’ cat is not a reason to come knocking at 2.30am - I’m a cat lover/owner but I’d never do this. I’d be in my garden shaking the dreamies pouch.

I would have been sharp with her I’m afraid. I have nothing against cats per se but my garden is my garden. I’d have helped in the morning, she shoukd keep her cat indoors at night if she’s that worried.

It’s not just being woken up, if the doorbell goes at 2:30am it’s the fear that something terrible has happened, same as if the phone rings at 2:30am.

Absolutely not on, and there’s no need to ‘be kind’ whatsoever.

100%

Oh sorry OP, read your update. Bloody hell!

All the same, knowing only what I did at that hour I'd have had a look.

Ok, I'd have made my DH have a look. Same thing.

Hope she doesn't try this again, she really does sound like she needs help for anxiety.

"Be kind" is a convenient slogan for people without boundaries.

My neighbour once told me to stop letting my cat go into their garden and on the shed, I said and how do I do that?. Now everytime I see the cat on the shed I say to him loudly "can you please get down from that shed and come in, your a naughty boy". He sits there all the time now staring into the kitchen window. They hate him so much. Hes a very lovely cuddly boy too 😔.

if her behaviour gets rewarded like this, she is likely to do it again.

I have cats and I would have e been furious if I was woken for this.
Also you missed the OP's further post about her coming back.

The day is young
Perhaps she’ll pop round with an apology note and box of chocs

And a convenient slogan for people who dislike other people having boundaries.

Is she elderly? We had a neighbour who developed dementia and the first sign that something was wrong was anxiety over her 'lost' cat.

I would have let them get the cat. I can’t see another person crying and not to want to help.

id also be worried about the cat in the garden. But I’m a cat mum so I’m not objective

This

Do you really think this? Personally I think this neighbour has demonstrated they don't have the capacity to recognise the impact of their behaviour on others.