Neighbour just rung doorbell at 2.30am!

[greywolfie]

I'm now wide awake and fumming. She rung twice so I opened the front bedroom window as I worried it might be an emergency. Women stood there on her phone in tears and I thought - oh, she could need help.
My husband is on his way down to.open the door.
Then she says...."my cat is in your garden"
I mean - FFS!
I said "well your cat will get out of our garden"
"Really?"
"Yes. If your cat is still in our garden in the morning we will bring it back"
Shut window.
Husband then opened the door and she started telling him about the damn cat- I yelled at him to shut it.
He wanted to go out and get it but I said that was mad and would encourage the over protective cat mother to do it again in future.
For reference, we have 2 elderly cats that very rarely scale the fence. One night one got over very late and was struggling to make it back (we have stuff by our fence that would've also helped her bloody cat up, if he cared - but their side is just the bare fence). I was a bit worried but would NEVER have rung their bell in the middle of the night! About an hour later our old lady regained her energy and made it back.
AIBU to go round in the morning and point out you don't ring people's doorbells for this reason? It's batshit right?

Ring, rang, rung. Now which one is correct? I am fuming that you do not know...
As for cats, well they do their own thing, do they not?

It is not unreasonable to be cross at 2.30am when you are woken up needlessly but as DH was already downstairs and willing to get said cat, I think it was a bit unkind to tell him not to. Of course I would tell your neighbour that this would never happen again and how unreasonable it was!
If you usually have a good relationship with your neighbour, I probably would have done it this one time. You never know when you might need something unreasonable....but it wouldn't happen twice.

If all members of my household are safely at home and my phone is working for people to call me, I am not answering my door at 2.30 am for anyone. Your neighbour is supremely selfish. Unless she knows you keep late hours, at that time of night it's fair to assume she'd be waking you up.

I would have helped. Presumably it’s an indoor cat who got out somehow, since you said she was visibly distressed. An indoor cat won’t necessarily find their own way home. I don’t think I would have rung on a neighbours door at 2:30am, but I would be in bits if it were my indoor cat so I have sympathy. I’m sure the responses here would all be very different if we were talking about someone crying and asking for help for their dog.

Update:
She's just been back- at about 5.15am. And rang the bell twice again. I got about another hour of sleep.
She's not my next door neighbour- she's from the back. My DD gets up at 5am for work and went out in the garden to check for cat. No cat.
Neighbour must have seen this and hurried round. This time I answered door and was really not kind.
I asked if cat was old, sick or injured.
No.
I told her cat would come back. It's really common for cats to wander and they rarely get stuck.
I told her it was not acceptable for her to ring the doorbell like this and she shouldn't ring anyone's doorbell before 7am at the earliest unless it's an emergency. A healthy cat wandering at night is not an emergency.
I appreciate she might have seen someone go out but there were no lights on and I was reliving my 2am anger.
The cat is probably fine and also not in our garden.
She currently hanging out the window yelling the cat's name.

What a stupid selfish cow she is! And how can she see the cat in the dark!

I would be seething over this, I’m usually the easygoing type.
Tell her to secure something against her fence.

Yanbu at all.

Your neighbour is incredibly selfish if she thinks it acceptable to ring the doorbell at 2.30am and and again at 5.15am

Missing cat is not an emergency that warrants waking your neighbours.

Can't believe some people on this thread think you or husband should have pandered to her at 2.30am!

A total mentalist!
On no planet was the neighbour’s behaviour ok. And I say that as a very devoted cat owner.

Guessing this is the first and only time that this has ever happened

and rather than just being kind you chose to kick off and start a thread about how angry you are

This has never ever happened before has it?

Did she have the decency to apologise? Did she give ANY mitigating circumstances for this bonkersness?!

Oh come on, someone who rang at 2:30 about a cat would have pissed me off too.
Keep the cats indoors.

I mean to be fair its now happened twice before 6am - I certainly wouldn't be encouraging that

It does seem the neighbour is unwell though- for whatever reason. Either she has anxiety or something more.

In that case, it's probably the first and only time OP has kicked off with her neighbour for this reason. Why is it only on OP to 'be kind' and accept the neighbour waking her up when all she had to do was ring OP's doorbell at a more reasonable hour?

If you are going to be selfish and ring someone's doorbell at 2:30am when it isn't an emergency, very few people are going to 'be kind' and rightly so.

yes tonight’s there’s been drama

but it would appear the first and only time this has ever happened

Clearly this woman has issues
If it had never happened before - I wouldn’t have got angry

If it happened again though….!

Had she opened with, "I am so sorry to disturb you at this time of night but my cat is very sick and has escaped into your garden ..." it might be a different story.

I would have been annoyed I struggle to stay asleep at the best of times and especially on a week night! But I wouldn’t go round just leave it. Btw is she elderly or younger ? I would understand more if she is older and maybe living on her own

I can't believe anyone thinks you're unreasonable let alone multiple posters! This women sounds completely devoid of any social understanding and I suspect all those be kind doormats wouldn't be so easy going and kind had they been disturbed by the doorbell multiple times before 5.30 over a cat.

Because it is so entitled, rude and unsocially acceptable to wake your neighbours at 2.30am for anything that isn't a medical emergency or a fire/flood

The neighbour wasn't "being kind" to op and her family when she decided that their need for sleep and a settled night was way down below her need to find her cat

Not everyone has to do things at the total detriment of themselves in the act of "being kind" It's ok for op to be angry about this and put boundaries in place

My thoughts too. Why else would she have been so upset?

Or she is just selfish. Even if she does have issues, all the more reason for OP to be firm or it will give the woman a free pass to do it again.

Agreed
It is rude and thoughtless

BUT
If it had never happened before
and clearly the woman was in quite a state
I wouldn’t have got angry