To ask Does any one actually go clubbing any more?

[blubberball]

My ds just turned 18, and I thought that he would be going to pubs and clubs with his college friends. This doesn't seem to be the case at all. They all seem to stay at home.

I've also noticed a lot of posters and adverts around my local area for over 30s and over 40s events. Day discos. Does any one actually go properly clubbing any more? I haven't been myself since a hen night probably 15 years ago, and it was crap. Dirty, sticky floors, tables and glasses, crap music, not many people dancing and a really aggressive, swearing DJ bloke.

Probably a good thing, as I remember binge drinking being a massive problem when I was young. It must be saving a fortune for the police and the NHS to no longer have this binge drinking culture. I used to work in a town centre as a driver years ago, and would see people being sick in the street at 10pm. It wasn't pleasant.

I am now indoors by 6pm, getting settled with curtains drawn. How are these clubs still in business?

Have you got any links to these? Really like the sound of them

The ones I know would be local to where I live, But look up terms like ecstatic dance: 5 rhythms: Shamanic dancing/ trance dancing: conscious clubbing: Medicine movement. There are a whole range of sub genres of this type of dance, so if you look up under these names you will find something near you if it exists.

kids are 4 & 1

We first left our daughter when she was 1.5 to go to glastonbury - my Mum and sister came and stayed in our house and off we went hahha - she was totally fine!

So we've kept it up most years we do a festival or 2 and we do go out clubbing through the year - just take a bit more planning than before as have to rope the parents and or sister in to look after the kids (and its gotta be overnight as we need to sleep in the next day LOLZ!)

I go to loads with friends / we take turns as well - i really haven't changed all that much since having the kids only that it's less often i go out i guess!

Sorry now I’m being reeeeeeally nosy, but what age did you have your kids? I didn’t imagine they were that little from your post! We’ll be almost 40 if/when we have a baby and I’ve heard the sleepless nights etc. shatter you. But if you were back out raving when your kid was 1.5 that’s incredibly inspiring!! I’ll tell DP we won’t need such an extended break from raves and festivals post-baby. 😁

I like day clubbing. Love a dance but don't want to be up late and a wreck the next day. Or worry about how to get home.

It probably depends on where you live. I mean, university cities possibly have more of a clubbing scene, though the main ones where I studied has since closed down.

As I live rurally, the teenagers that I know all go to Young Farmers' Club events, so that is probably our closest equivalent! (And yes, they do know how to party, even if it does mean borrowing the family tractor to get there, if you're too young for your driving licence!).

I was a big clubber in the late '90s early '00s. It's rare that I do it now that I am nearly 50, but there are plenty of good club nights to be had, especially aimed at gen x and millennials. For example, they start and end much earlier. Probably helps that I'm in a big city.

DH and I (48 and 52) go clubbing sometimes now we can leave the kids at home! We do see younger people or clubbing at house/techno type clubs, but I'd say most people seem either under 30 or over 40 - maybe just a reflection on people having kids and not going out rather than a generational thing.

Our oldest is nearly 18 and very social but has been very law abiding and insists he will not go to anywhere 18+ until he's legally old enough. He's mostly interested in LGBTQ+/cabaret places rather than clubbing, and he's quite noise sensitive.

haha - yeah my husband is a bit older - so i had the kids when i was 35 & 38 ( he was 45 & 48) im very close with my parents & sister and they are really involved and love to have the kids - so im lucky in that sense i guess!

I don’t think there’s a clubbing scene like there used to be. I enjoyed my clubbing days - so much fun. A lot of day time clubbing events now so means oldies like me can go out all day and still be in bed by midnight! Lots of festivals etc. still around and a good pub scene.

A lot of the pubs in our City Centre don't close at 11.30pm like they use to & are open til early morning so kids these days don't go clubbing as such just stay out later drinking in different bars.

Pubs havent closed at 11.30 for over 20 years!

We are in our 50s and still go clubbing. We follow DJs we like and will book when theyre in our city or cities close by. We'll travel to events such as Carl Cox at Brighton beach. I think if you were part of that original acid house/rave scene it never leaves you. There are a lot of people there in their 20s. Its a real mix of ages.

I think its for a few reasons.

A lot of older teens/young adults are less confident and more nervous than we were. Many of them would feel anxious about staying out all night or getting drunk/doing drugs and wouldn't even entertain it.

The other aspect is the cost. It's just too expensive now and with 9k student fees, they just can't afford it.

The world has changed. The carefree youth are no longer carefree. It makes me sad as I feel they are missing out, but at least they won't have to deal with as many hangovers as I did!

I was a massive raver back in the day (late 80s onwards), as were most of my friends. A few of them still go to clubs and raves occasionally, or dance music festivals. I hardly do anymore, generally because my knees are destroyed (probably from all those all night raves) and I just can’t be arsed. Daytime things if I do, or a (very) special occasion. My partner’s DD goes to clubs and raves all the time, Drum n Bass mainly, new artists not old school. My DS rarely goes out out. When he does he enjoys it but it’s not really his thing.

Agree. I was a big clubber for the best part of 20 years and it was awesome at its best but looking back I now am pretty horrified at the sheer debauchery and the health impacts.

Maybe I’m just getting old but I think my generation (born early 70s) was incredibly debauched: drinking to excess, drug taking (including hard drugs), smoking and just generally having to be on some sort of stimulant to have fun a lot of the time was so ubiquitous. I know not everyone was doing it but it was the dominant culture of the age.

So many of my peers have had health issues as a result, a lot of addiction etc but the worst part was the sheer waste of time. All the things we could have done which we didn’t because we were sleeping off 48 hour hangovers.

There was much to celebrate: the solidarity and just the sheer ability to let go is hard to replicate today. I do miss aspects of it.

I probably sound like a miserable old cow. But long term I think we will see it in many ways as a very decadent generation. I don’t want it for my daughter, when she gets there.

@Thepeopleversuswork

I couldn't agree more. I spent the majority of the 90s and early 00s off my head and falling out of night clubs, as did most of my friends. The culture at the time encouraged it and as a result, many of my friends who are now in their 40s are living sober lifestyles due to the damage it did them - same with many of the celebrities who followed that lifestyle back then too.

I am not saying I didnt enjoy it at the time, but looking back I put myself in some extremely dangerous situations and I am very lucky I escaped relatively unharmed. I am really happy that my teenagers are not embracing that lifestyle and that its gone out of fashion because the idea of seeking fun no matter the cost to your health is not a good way to live.

@mistymorninglight

I am really happy that my teenagers are not embracing that lifestyle and that its gone out of fashion because the idea of seeking fun no matter the cost to your health is not a good way to live.

Same here (so far). Mine is 15 and so far isn’t remotely interested in any of this. Long may it last.

I think the clubbing/raving generation was an anomaly. We benefited from the longest period of economic growth and stability in a century and relatively high employment etc. It was a bit of a weird bubble, unlikely to be repeated.

This generation sadly lacks a lot of this but the upside is that it forces them to be much more resilient and focused and they don’t have the luxury of spaffing their lives up the wall.

@Thepeopleversuswork Yup.

What you said here really rang true for me and it's what I regret the most: "but the worst part was the sheer waste of time. All the things we could have done which we didn’t because we were sleeping off 48 hour hangovers"

My entire uni degree was spent writing essays at the very last minute when I was hungover as hell, had no sleep and had a banging headache. I dont know how I got a 2:1. I felt like shit most of the time due to my shenanigans the night before.

But you are right - I wasted so much precious time being hungover and I could have spent it on getting fit, or finding ways to improve my income or doing extra courses or learning a new skill. No point regretting it now because what's done is done but damn, that time was completely wasted 😟

@mistymorninglight

My entire uni degree was spent writing essays at the very last minute when I was hungover as hell, had no sleep and had a banging headache. I dont know how I got a 2:1. I felt like shit most of the time due to my shenanigans the night before.

Exactly. I also scraped a 2:1 and did OK and I would be lying if I said it had totally derailed my life. But it took me a while to get myself established in work afterwards and when I look back at the opportunities university provided and what I could have done with my spare time I kick myself.

I spent 80% of my free time in pubs or clubs or sitting around in people's living rooms smoking weed. It could have been a lot worse but if I think of what I could have crammed into that time it does seem like a huge waste.

I spent 80% of my free time in pubs or clubs or sitting around in people's living rooms smoking weed. It could have been a lot worse but if I think of what I could have crammed into that time it does seem like a huge waste.

Exactly. I keep thinking, if only I had invested in bitcoin or Microsoft. I'd be quids in now 😩

No idea why my post hidden! I was saying wish I had invested in various stocks in the 90s instead of dossing about because I'd be quids in now 😩

I dont think it was a waste of time at all. I had the absolute time of my life. Being there when the rave scene exploded was a privilege that can't even be explained unless you were there. One of those seminal moments in time. No way I'd have given that up to get a grade higher, crazy thinking. I was fit, still played a sport to a high standard, still got a degree, still got a masters, have a good life with no health problems. Don't regret any come downs or hangovers as they were worth it. We played hard and worked hard then I think. Good times

I do wish I'd have bought Bitcoin earlier though. That's the first thing I'd do if I could go back in time

@XiCi I'm glad you feel that way! I dont think the clubbing itself was a waste of time but for me personally, I waste a lot of time on hangovers which I do regret and a lot of my friends have had health issues caused by overdoing it back then which is not great.

I feel that way now in my mid 50s about hangovers and don't really drink anymore. In your 20s though your body copes so much better. We'd all think nothing of pulling an all nighter and going straight to work, even in our 30s. Now though if I did something like that I'd feel sub human till the Wednesday 😄