To think this isn’t how it works? (Private school bursary)

[Fenchurk]

DS is in Y5 and the school mums are all debating which secondary to go for. We have one good state school, one not so good a bit further away and one private school nearby.

One of DS’ friends is now apparently applying to the private school. It’s very expensive, with everything included would be about 10k a term. When we were all talking, the mum (we’ve been good friends since Reception so I know her well) she said her plan is to get a bursary for half the fees as she’s on UC, and get her son’s dad to pay for the other half. She hasn’t actually spoken to the school yet.

AIBU to think this isn’t how it works? Although she’s on UC - as are we - she’s remarried and owns her home, has a car on HP, goes on holidays etc. Her son is not academically able or particularly talented in anything, so I don’t think he’d get a scholarship.

I think she is living in a dream world ...

She would have to provide all her finances and those of her exdh and yes, the school would expect her to be making lifestyle sacrifices to put her kid through private school.

I looked into it a bit and they were clear with the local one that they wouldn't expect bursary children to be going on expensive holidays and would require extensive financial information. We looked into it as my daughter is academic - nearly perfect sats scores etc.

My friend's DD went to an independent school and had a mixture of scholarships and a bursary. For the bursary part there was a lot of financial info and proof required annually. It wasn't enough to say that they were a low income household.

I always thought your child needed to be pretty exceptional to get in, and that bursaries were linked to scholarships.

DH is friends with the boy’s dad and says he reckons that household is on about 100k (the dad is remarried too) so I think that’d be considered, even if the mum is on UC?

I considered putting ds in for the 100% bursaries a local private school does. There was an exam obviously and it’s known to be an academic hothouse. In the end I didn’t as I didn’t want either him or us to be under pressure to maintain academic performance or face unaffordable fees. I also assumed the financial assessment would be extremely stringent and wasn’t sure if they would pull the bursary if our finances improved.

Having said that… it’s up to her and I really wouldn’t comment or get involved.

If he isn’t academically outstanding then her idea is dead in the water. I wouldn’t waste any more time thinking about it.

She's in cloud cuckoo land..

The burser will go through their finances with a fine tooth comb as part of the selection process. Father and mother. They've seen it all before and know what the red flags look like.

Plus she's also forgetting that the competition will be exceptionally fierce too so it won't be a case of just getting one.

Some people talk rubbish and seem to convince themselves that because they want something then it must be true. Just ignore it, inwardly roll your eyes and don't get involved. It probably won't be mentioned again once she realises what's involved.

Ok as I thought! Her son is definitely not academically outstanding, he’s in the lowest group for anything they stream.

Cheers all.

I would nod and smile and not involve myself further.

I have friends who work in private schools and they all say their bursary schemes are quite thorough in regards to parents financial backgrounds. There are usually several students going for the bursary and often an exam. Some years the bursary amount is shared between quite a few students so isn't the amount of half the fees. Could your friend afford to go if dad is paying £5k but she has to pay the other £3k or £4k. What if the bursary scheme is withdrawn or significantly reduced half way through his education? She will need to look carefully at the fee structure too, some private schools put their fees up for year 10 and 11.

Since the VAT fiasco has happened there are some private schools that have significantly reduced their bursary offer as they are using that money to pad out existing students fees - particularly those in GCSE or other exam years.

Bursary provision and awards vary from one school to another - so the only way any parent can learn more is to have a preliminary conversation with the school, and then apply if they are eligible.

Some bursaries are linked to scholarship awards, others are separate; members of my wider family have benefitted from both types. It sounds as if she’s looking at day schools? I can only speak about boarding, where the school is often looking for more than mere academic prowess.

If her son isn’t that bright then he hasn’t got a chance of getting a place, let alone a bursary. I think the phrase “not my circus, not my monkeys” is apt here. Just smile and nod when she talks about her plan.

Bursaries are nothing to do with scholarships.

Child would have to pass the entrance exams, but wouldn't need a scholarship to receive a bursary.

likely both the dad and new husband’s assets and income would be taken into account. Schools often use external companies to do a fairly through ‘audit’ to ensure bursaries are going to the right places.

Some schools offer bursaries to children who are average academically because of other factors in their life. Having a sibling with extreme needs or loss of a parent or similar. So it’s not always related to academic prowess. But many will also insist on an additional academic assessment.

Many schools partner with charities that might pay the other half of fees and support expenses. My orphaned nephew benefitted from such a scheme but he was also v bright.

He said all the kids on bursaries had the same (charity provided) laptop. He was a boarder and that brings other benefits to children from less structured backgrounds.

Then that would be a definite no. You have to be bringing something extra to the table to get financial help.

I’m dumbfounded she’s on UC with a £100k household income. How on earth does that work?

Our local private schools have very very strict conditions for bursaries and from what I read you needed to prove a low household income as well as things like absence of savings and equity in the house to qualify. The sort of income they are prepared to support really sounded very low and unmanageable to then fund uniform and trips etc. (So not entirely sure which would go for it really).

Scholarships reduce fees a little bit you do need to be talented/exceptional and for the ones I looked at you're only being offered 10-20% off fees, so a nice to have rather than a real financial facilitator.

It depends on the school. Each sets its
own policies. So she might be right. Or she might be deluded.

If he’s generally in bottom stream she’s deluded. There has to be a reason why a school
wants to financially support one applicant over another and it will usually be down to being very good at something, academically, musically, something more than average. My eldest got an academic scholarship (10%), which was their norm), he had to take tests and be interviewed and my youngest got offered full (100%) fee waive at 6th form, because they were both outstanding for their school (which was nice as they went to state primary, not prep). They weren’t handed these offers on a plate, they had to prove themselves personally deserving.

Obviously gets his brains from his mum.

I know someone with a large bursary, their income is low but they are mortgage free. That was excluded which surprised me.

I think that’s the dad’s household income, not he mum’s (who is on UC).

Every school is different with regard to how selective it is and requirements for bursaries/scholarships but it does seem like a bit of a pipe dream that a non academic kid with a high earning father would get any assistance. If he’s bottom sets for everything then he might not get in at all unless the school is massively undersubscribed, let alone getting any financial assistance.

It’s not just about the 10k per term has she thought about the ridiculous price school trips such as 2k to Canada skiing and the silly expensive uniform. I think she’s living in a dreamland!

Well, there’s a difference between being mortgage free in a falling down two bedroomed flat above a chip shop, and mortgage free in an inherited stately home. IME schools look for bursary applicants who have already maximised their income and have no options to increase it further - but they’re not expecting prospective pupils to be homeless. Modest home; modest holidays; necessary car - all generally acceptable.

They will also (particularly with boarding) consider whether enabling a child to attend the school might improve the prospects of the whole family - by, for example, allowing a parent to accept a job that doesn’t work with day school hours. Or to enable a child to thrive where there are other dependents in the household (maybe a sibling) who demand a huge amount of time and care.

But in these straitened times I don’t think many schools will be eager to make awards to children gracing the bottom sets - unless there’s a strong reason for that placing.