Has lack of Premier Inn breakfast ruined the weekend?

[Liesmorelies]

I mean, it hasn't, not for me, but DH seems to feel otherwise and I don't know if I've been UR. We (us and two dc) were in London overnight to see a show. We would normally maximise our time in the city and leave maybe this sort of time on Sunday, but we've all been ill and still feel a bit tired and rundown and so agreed we'd leave after breakfast and maybe a walk/quick trip to a park or the river.

When I woke I realised our PI was about a 20 minute walk from Shoreditch market where I was sure there are loads of cafes and stalls. Although we normally have the PI breakfast I thought this would be a nice change and mean we would be doing what we had planned (quick trip to somewhere nice and a walk) and could then leave. Also looked up a particular cafe that looked nice. Everyone agreed - all fine.

When we arrived at the cafe there was a queue. DH immediately said in a moody way, 'That's that then,' and started huffing. I said let's walk up (we were at the end of the road) it might not be that bad, but he had walked off. We ended up wandering around the area with him getting increasingly grumpy. Sods law, we weren't really going past any suitable looking cafes, although I'm sure the area is full of them. We did see a Pret but I didn't want that.

We eventually saw a nice independent cafe where we were able to have porridge,pastries, toast and spreads, fresh juice and lovely coffee. We all ate but DH wouldn't stop going on about the bloody PI. Yes, I get that he would eat his body weight there and we ended up with a relatively small breakfast that probably cost more (though our kids are 16 and 18, so no more free PI breakfasts!) but what we had was lovely, the place was lovely, and a bit different, and, ffs, PI will still be there next time. I offered to look for another place or even a Greggs for him to 'top up,' but he went in full strop mode. DS1 loves a PI breakfast too and he didn't moan, and dd was wanting pancakes in the place with a queue but she didn't moan that she didn't end up getting them, it's just him acting like a child. He also moaned about the cost, saying PI breakfast would have done for lunch as well, but we were home in time for a late lunch and no one wanted food on the journey so it's like he's just looking for stuff to moan about.

We're home now but he has said he's sick of me making all the decisions, I'm fussy and nothing is good enough and I'm just hard work. He's gone for a run but it was an atmosphere all the way home. Did I do wrong - I get I could have looked at booking but to me it worked out fine in the end.

Lots of replies along the lines of

"My kids love a PI breakfast"
"I'm somebody who needs to eat as soon as I wake up"
"I'd have wanted the PI breakfast" if I was ill and tired"

... You're all grown ups with working communication systems, yes? Then you would have used them at the appropriate time to say "Actually darling, I was really fancying the PI breakfast, can we stick to that? We can always get lunch or a coffee and cake out if you like?"

Use your damn words. Like he didn't. It's not hard!

PI breakfasts are shit since they stopped doing the cooked breakfast buffet style. I prefer to choose my own.

Have I missed why you didn't all go for PI breakfast then a walk @Liesmorelies?

Most people have said his behaviour is unacceptable tbf, they're just also saying that they kind of "get it" as well.

Everyone agreed to this so I'm not seeing how you are being unreasonable.

Indeed. It seems a bit irrelevant to me. The important part is, he agreed to go elsewhere then threw a tantrum when that didn't immediately work out and has carried that on for the rest of the day. It's absolutely ridiculous behaviour over a breakfast!

I’ve voted YABU.

Your DH and DCs love PI breakfasts. (Mine are the same but I can take or leave them but they are too good value to skip) The breakfast was something they were likely looking forward to + was excellent value (portion and money). Instead, you decide at short notice to switch to a 'naice' café, which they weren’t expecting. Did you not have the opportunity to go somewhere 'naice'/trendy the day before?

They accommodate you, only to find a queue, meaning breakfast clearly isn’t happening any time soon. You then spend ages hunting for the prefect alternative. Your clearly hangry DH and the DCs end up paying more for smaller portions of food they didn’t would not have chosen. The only person who actually got what they wanted here was you.

To top it off, you double down and moan why didn't he just get a Greggs after he traipsed around half of London for an expensive micro breakfast that he didn't want. I’m not surprised he’s annoyed. From the outside, this doesn’t read as a one off, you sound like someone who prioritises their own preferences and expects everyone else to adjust around them.

We had a PI breakfast for the first and last time last week - it was absolutely awful! The hash browns could have been used to build a wall, tasteless mushrooms, solid scrambled egg, insipid sausages - what a waste of money!

Everyone in my family (especially the blokes with good metabolisms) love a premier inn breakfast. I think if he's been unreasonable depends on what his reaction was when you first suggested skipping the PI brekkie and going to find a cafe. If it was full agreement that he was happy then he's got no reason to complain. If he was unhappy and really wanted the PI breakfast but begrudgingly went along with your plan then I can see why he was grumpy. PI is easy and feels like holiday to me...wandering around in a strange place that you don't know, on a Sunday morning, while everyone gets hangry is no fun at all. I think if I'd gone along with the plan against my better judgement I'd also be pissed off at the long queue and the traipsing and the extra cost for a bit of porridge (do you know PI always make porridge for you on request? My son nearly always has hot porridge with honey and jam, a heated croissant with butter, some yoghurt and fruit, and a hot chocolate)

Never had a bad premier inn breakfast - the tomato may not be vine ripened and the sausages not Lincolnshire but it’s not that dreadful- especially if you do not know an area and need food before exploring plus the price is set.

Yes he could or should have done perhaps

And then she says 'no I dont want that', like she did with Pret

And he says, well I do. And she says well I dont

And he uses his words to insist that he will have the PI breakfast as suggested

And she either goes along with that or she goes out traipsing around to find a nice little cafe

Cue the next thread 'husband refused to come out for breakfast with us', I was forced to have a crap PI breakfast and had to endure UPF supermarket bread - shudders.

Posters would be falling over themselves to say he was controlling, forceful, selfish, hes already been accused of 'wanting to stuff his face rather than spend time with his family'.

Obviously it's not just the breakfast that is bothering him, but on this occasion, if this is exactly how it unfolded then he yes is BU.

I want to agree with you but sometimes practicality and that sense of 'better the devil you know' trumps finding that exciting little hipster bagel cafe down the back of some Dalston side street. As the OP pointed out, they tried that, there was a massive queue and it didn't work out.

Also when there is four or more of you it can take ages finding somewhere everyone agrees on. Who doesn't love a decent, self service, all you can eat buffet breakfast with loads of choice from light, fresh and healthy to gigantic builder's fry up?

If my husband had his heart set on a nice cafe for breakfast, I’d go along with it.

After an hour of walking aimlessly around, I’d be furious.

She should have planned it and booked something properly.

I feel I need to clarify (though I thought I had...) a few things:

• Everyone AGREED to the plan. It may have been a stupid idea, but on one was forced to agree to it.
• The word 'traipsing' keeps coming up. We weren't. We looked up a place (all happy with the menu) and headed straight there. In retrospect, we should have tried to book and I'll be honest, the thought vaguely entered my head but I dismissed it. When we got there there was a queue. Maybe if we had asked we could have waited and eaten there after a wait, but dh wouldn't entertain it. Maybe they would have turned us away anyway but we don't know.
• We then headed on to the market (yes, Spitalfields - sorry, got the name wrong) and walked past one Pret, which I rejected. Within 10-15 mins we were inside the cafe we ate in, which was lovely but didn't do cooked breakfasts.
• The PI breakfast hadn't been paid for and neither would it have been free.
• Obviously, in hindsight, we should have booked somewhere and not done this in such a spur of the moment way, but, once it was done, my question is, is dh right to be acting like I've ruined the weekend and carrying on sulking? Other people loving PI breakfasts and never dreaming of not having them isn't really relevant.

But it does slightly depend on how the question is asked and information given. If someone said to me, can we do a walk
to get breakfast, there are loads of nice cafes around here I’d agree because it would seem churlish/ antisocial. If it turned out that there weren’t any decent places, or they all had queues and I ended up with a croissant when I wanted bacon and eggs I might be a bit…miffed the next day, especially if I was cold, run down and hungry. I don’t think I’d behave like the OPs husband mind you but I might need to have a word with myself!

I wouldn’t agree to it in January at all unless somewhere was booked TBH- brunch on a Sunday is really popular- but then I know the area pretty well.

Do you think it ran away from you a little bit there?

I'm a breakfast person, I know not everyone is fussed about it but I would be in a grump if I had a long walk around to find somewhere for breakfast. It would be even more annoying if the original plan had been to have a breakfast I'd been looking forward to right there in the hotel before the long walk.

He agreed to try a particular place for breakfast. That's the not the same as "I am happy to shlep around London whilst you take your sweet time finding somewhere that meets your needs alone".

You are SO right.

my question is, is dh right to be acting like I've ruined the weekend and carrying on sulking

Of course that's not okay.

Well it obviously has for DH. PI breakfast next time then. Compromise.

I dunno, every time I’ve had breakfast at a premier inn it’s been great, and very filling. I live in a place that’s full of independent cafes, quality and service is variable and they are all expensive.
I probably would have gone for the PI breakfast and then found a cafe for coffee and cake before going home but there was absolutely no need for your DH to be a dick about it and still be stroppy now.

Agreed. He didn’t get his own way and sulked all day. I’m guessing matters would be even worse if you responded to his criticism of you?

I'm definitely team DH on this. The best thing about staying at a Premier Inn is the breakfast - if you're not going to have that, in London you might as well stay somewhere nice.

We go our local Premier Inn even when we aren't staying there for breakfast!