In wanting DH to go to bed early

[TicklishHedgehog]

DH generally only gets in from work at gone 7. He stays up super late, often only goes to bed at around 2 in the morning.

The problem is he’s then exhausted the next morning and we have two young children. So when they wake up it’s me who goes to them as DH is unconscious. For years now I’ve got up with them in the morning and I don’t mind in the week but never having a break from it gets me down

😂😂😂

He needs to be on night duty and tend to the kids when they wake up. I bet he will start to go to bed much earlier. Tell him you have done it for years, you're exhausted and it's his turn now.

Dinner ready for when he gets in, then it's lights out at 11- no exceptions, he is running himself and you into the ground.

Have you ever suggested that one night a month he tries going to bed earlier on a Friday night to see if it helps him wake with the kids on Saturday? He seems to want to get up…

My husband is the same. We don’t have a biological child together but I know 100% that he could sleep through a crying child in another room. He sleeps so deeply and heavily that if the child was in our room and crying, it would take him an age to wake up and he would be extremely grumpy as a result. Anything disturbing his sleep makes him wildly angry. It’s one of the reasons I didn’t want more children with him. A small one - but it was a factor because it is WILDLY annoying. It feels very precious when one partner gets to manage their needs perfectly.

We do have dogs though and my husband is very aware that I manage their early morning needs disproportionately and he will set his alarm to give me a break if I ask for one. I’m a natural early riser and like you, once I’m awake I am AWAKE and can’t get back to sleep. When I’m very shattered I ask him to pre-empt the dogs skittering and whining for a wee by setting an alarm and he cheerfully does, because he loves me.

Right. Why accept it at a? Presumably he manages to get up for work perfectly fine?

Is there a reason he doesn’t want to parent his own children?

That just sounds deeply unattractive tbh.

He sounds incredibly selfish. Once kids arrive its not on to continue living like a teenager