Angry woman on plane, Was we BU?

[Raynaud]

7 hour flight with DH and DS(4). As soon as seatbelt lights went off DH fully reclined exhausted DSs seat so he could sleep. The woman behind snapped at DH to put the seat back up as drinks would be coming around soon. DH said no as drinks currently not being served. She called him a selfish twat to her OH.
Drinks/snacks start coming around. Woman tells DH to put the seat back up. DH put the seat back up half way so to not wake DS. She tells him to put it fully up. He tells her DS is sleeping. Her OH then tells her to speak to steward which she does. Steward asks DH to put the seat back up - he tells her DS is sleeping. I tell him to just put it back up, he again says DS is sleeping. Air Steward starts getting pissed off, I snap at DH to put the bloody seat up. He does so reluctantly and DS does not wake.

Once everything is cleared away he puts the seat fully back again. The woman complains that he’s doing that out of badness because “the kid” is still asleep. Her OH confirms that yes, DH is a twat.

My take on it is that both were being unreasonable at different times. My sister however says this was all on DH.

Excuse the typos in both posts. Too late to edit 😆

The safety talk? That happens on the tarmac, and everyone’s seats are upright at that point…

I didn't say it wasn't 'flight policy if a passenger ASKS them to intervene'. I said IN MY OPINION she was a TWAT. The child was asleep, she was a twat to make such a fuss when she only had a drink.

ive been on plenty of flights & several times managed meals with the seat in front reclined because the person needed to have the seat reclined, let alone just a drink.

its nothing to do with deciding 'my families convenience'. I'm not the OP's husband.

i think it's acceptable she can 'make do' because it's not a big deal & the child was asleep & im not a selfish twat. HTH

It wasn't a meal time. It was a drink.

She means give the instructions about reclining after the safety talk, not allow reclining at that point.

I agree it’s on the airlines as well who have created this situation, it’s all about cramming people in and maximising profits

So much so that over the year the airlines might make a tenner on the average passenger.....🤔

Airlines know that one of, if not the, main driver of passenger choice of flights is ticket cost...

They facilitate that by maximising capacity (within reason), that means tightning seat pitch in economy but having premium economy/economy plus etc for the cohort willing to pay more....

I disagree, the etiquette is that reclining is fine as long as the drinks/food service is not ongoing.

You deem it unnecessary, others will say they are uncomfortable/in pain otherwise. And similarly, some people don’t mind when others recline whereas others do.

tray only works if the person behind isnt fat.

Flying long haul in economy just isn’t comfortable whether you recline or not. If you’re in the middle of a row behind someone who reclines I feel like a sardine wedged in a tin.It’s doable for me in the extra leg room seats which are usually reserved quickly and are more expensive, premium seats push the price up by alot more. I’d rather just do closer holiday destinations on shorter flights with budget airlines that i actually find quite comfortable.

Also people connect to flights from all kinds of time zones. It might be a day flight for one but it's night for someone else. When it comes to long haul flights, time enters a different dimension (when else do you eat a full dinner at 1am 😀)

Some predictably stupid responses here. Particularly the ones that deduce that reclining at any time is appropriate, because the the seats have that functionality. Well, my car horn works while the car is stationary at 3am. I can access my stereo system's volume level 30 at 3am also. My phone can play loud rap music, and spotify will enable me to play songs with particularly explicit lyrics on packed trains. My biology will facilitate defecating on the floor of my local co-op. All possible, all terrible behaviour.

This row is a symptom of the "I can do what I like" society where individuals love to tell everyone what they can do, and just wont be told what they can't do without resorting to aggression.

Unfortunately, our civilisation is now too thick and too self-centred to leave this down to judgement and decency. We need an announcement reminding people to not recline until meal service has been completed and cleared, and do so slowly and carefully, with consideration.

Actually plane seats have always reclined (other than the budget airlines where they've basically never).

I've flown a lot long-haul and since I was a baby due to having immigrant parent and flying back to their country each year (and I'm old now). Always reclined as does everyone else. The ONLY tme I ever had a problem was a couple of years ago with a British family who kicked off and hit and pushed my seat when I gently reclined after he meal service and they created havoc insisting that no one should recline (and this was a long haul night flight).

The entitled behaviour is insisting that no one should recline and people should sacrifice the comfort they are actually entitled to and paid for so you are more comfortable (when you have the option to pay extra to sit in a bulkhead or exit row or even pay for 2 seats so no one sits in the seat in front just like people who are too big need to apy for the seat next to them so as not to inconvenince other passengers)

I agree. Not before meal and drinks but after is fine. Don't jerk it back suddenly too. But if you don't like recliners when no food/drink is involved, and the lights are dimmed, don't fly economy.

It's common sense!

Which is unfortunately lesson common these days, as OP's Prince among men husband demonstrates.

Yeah, so let the airline tell them ‘officially’ not to do this and it will carry more weight than a random stranger saying they shouldn’t, or a steward trying to manage an argument. If they disobey the rule then there are penalties.

Why does your child sleeping undisturbed trump everyone else's convenience? The child would very likely have been able to sleep without the seat reclined, and even if they couldn't you can't assume your comfort, or your child's comfort is more important than someone else's.

LTB!!!

Yes that makes sense. I read it that they could recline after the safety briefing 😂sorry!

No the selfish twat is the one who thinks it’s ok not to briefly stop reclining during mealtimes and yes of course it goes without saying I’m talking about drinks too. People use the table whether it’s drink or food coming out hence you’re not meant to recline.

If someone behind you doesn’t mind you reclining during mealtime that’s up to them but this woman did mind.

As I’ve said, using the child is a crappy excuse. A child can still sleep with the chair upright and even if not they could also have had the child sleeping on their lap when they had to put a brief pause to reclining the seat.

There were options which didn’t require ignoring the women’s request and arguing with the cabin crew.

Exactly.

And the fact some people are calling the woman who had to put up with a reclined seat for almost the whole journey - and not the man who didn’t want to put it back up around meal times - the selfish one is a joke.

I had a guy in front of me like that and it was frustrating. Instead of him being grateful he got to recline the majority of the 7/8 hour flight, he tried to kick up up a fuss about having to be upright during mealtimes which were obviously a fraction of the flight time.

The screen was right up in my face while he was fully reclined, I didn’t like it but of course I tolerated it since it was airline policy and that is course the risk you take in economy.

But yet he didn’t want to follow the rules when it came to mealtimes. Thankfully the cabin crew wasn’t having it and he was reminded to put his seat up every single time the food or drinks came out .

Those pesky seats that have been fully reclined have a habit of being knocked, pulled or lent on as passengers move around as normal because they have so much less room. Imagine those passengers your DH was pissing off acting in a similar manner towards your husband and waking your child up.

Would have been so much more civilised with

"Do you mind if we recline the seat just so child can get to sleep. As soon as he is asleep we will put it back up"

"Yeah, no problem, if you could have it up when drinks and food are served that would be great"

"Aye, no problem, i will try to adjust it as we go so its back up asap"

Drinks/snacks start coming around. Woman tells DH to put the seat back up. DH put the seat back up half way so to not wake DS. She tells him to put it fully up. He tells her DS is sleeping. Her OH then tells her to speak to steward which she does. Steward asks DH to put the seat back up - he tells her DS is sleeping. I tell him to just put it back up, he again says DS is sleeping. Air Steward starts getting pissed off, I snap at DH to put the bloody seat up. He does so reluctantly and DS does not wake

So it was drink AND snacks (ie. Food) being served not just drinks as a pp said.

The child was still sleeping when he put the seat upright. All the 4 year olds I know would sleep through that so it’s no surprise, even if they did wake they’d easily get back to sleep in most cases.

There are exceptions of course but OP’s child was not one of them since she herself confirmed their child didn’t wake up. And I’m sure they both knew that would be the case.

It was obvious their husband was engaging in a power struggle with this woman so once again their husband and people here using “the sleeping kid” to excuse his selfish and antagonistic behaviour is a nonsense.

And if he was so concerned about his child waking up on a plane 🙄 maybe arguing with multiple people or running the risk of the woman accidentally banging the back of the reclined seat while trying to eat wasn’t that wise.

Sorry OP but your DH was being a Twat. There's very little room on a lot of planes & to have the seat in front reclined right back invades what little space you have already & can make it hard to eat or drink or use your own table. You can buy seat extension hammock like things for children to sleep on which hangs over your table & back to the seat so the child can lie down & their legs are laying across the hammock in the foot space with their head on the actual seat. No need for the seat to be reclined & the child is laying down.

@Gossipisgood

You can buy seat extension hammock like things for children to sleep on which hangs over your table & back to the seat so the child can lie down & their legs are laying across the hammock in the foot space with their head on the actual seat.

Those and quite a few similar devices are not permitted by quite a few airlines..

It's worth checking any prospective airline's policy before spending money on one.