Is your family shrinking?

[sunshine244]

I know there's a trend for people to have fewer kids currently, and am curious is others are finding similar patterns.

My kids only have one cousin despite them having 4 sets of aunts and uncles in their 40s. There's not likely to be any more children due to circumstances/age.

My own 6 cousins (40s-50s) have only had 4 children in total, and again it is unlikely there will be more.

Family gatherings are a lot quieter than when I was a child!

Mine hasn't really changed size but it feels very much closer now.

I have 4 cousins, but they are all a bit older than me so we were never close growing up, and haven't been in adulthood either. Our parents weren't close to their respective brothers (fathers of my cousins) so we didn't have big family Christmases really, our grandparents used to alternate between us rather than us all coming together.

In comparison, my sister and I are very close and have children only 18 moths apart, and I have number 2 on the way. I expect my sister will also have another at some point. Our children are close and we do lots together as a whole family, including our parents and husbands, so it definitely has more of a big family vibe than when I was growing up, despite actually being a very similar size.

Yes. I am one of a group of 9 cousins born in 1950's to 1960's. We 9 cousins had 14 children (3 had no children) but those 14 have, to date, only had 3 children.

I have two brothers, and 9 cousins. 8 of us cousins were all born within 5 years of each other and grew up spending a lot of time together,

Now days, my boys have 4 cousins, and none of them live in the same country as us. So no big family get togethers like I had growing up, which I find a bit sad.

They do see the children of my husbands cousins a bit - I guess that is like 2nd cousins? Although the cousins children call me and my husband "Aunty and Uncle", and the kids refer to each other just as cousins. There is 8 of those cousins.

Of my brothers and cousins - 2 didn't want children, 3 couldn't have them for various reasons. In total from 12 people of my generation in my family - we have produced 14 of the next generation!

Definitely.

People might blame cost of living but we should remember the costs we expect now are different to when we were kids. Standard stuff now is swimming lessons, cars, soft play etc but as kids we didn't have weekly lessons and softplay was a birthday treat. Instead we were chucked out onto the green to play all afternoon and ate whatever junk we foraged from eachothers houses when we were hungry - there was no expectation our parents would prepare a healthy snack.

So effort to raise a child has increased in conjunction with people remembering the sibling squabbles they had and that kids are actually hard work so just opting out.

Between me and DH, we have 3 siblings (so our parents raised 5 kids). The 5 of us are raising 2 kids. There are 2 only children and 2 are childfree by choice siblings.

Surprisingly my family is bucking the trend. I have 4 siblings and 6 cousins, DH 3 siblings and 3 cousins. My 2 kids have 13 direct cousins, with potentially more on the cards - incredibly their ages range from 40 to 10 months! This means there is now 13 more in the next generation (I can never remember if that's second cousins or once removed).

My mother has 24 direct descendants (plus various spouses) in 3 generations - whole family get-togethers are now almost impossible!

No, there genuinely is a big, measurable trend here.

Sounds a bit silly, child free makes it sound like children are some disease to be avoided 😂
If someone doesn't want children they aren't going to be offended at childless.
Its the same common suffix as selfless, speechless, homeless, careless, fearless, just basic english.

Yes, very much.
My parents born 1949/50 came from a family of 11 children, 20 Aunts/uncles. I have close to 50 cousins between both parents.
My parents had 5 children. We have 1&2 child families. The next generation will be lonely.
I see a lot of my cousins at weddings, funerals. Our children don’t know each other so no bond there. I’ve great memories of being around a lot of family.
As siblings we’re close, the 7 cousins are close, 3 on DH side also close bond.

Another one from a HUGE Irish family. Tonnes of siblings, about 60+ cousins. But yes we are all having way smaller families - which is a good thing!!

Oh yes. 4 grandparents, 3 children and they've ended up with one grandchild. Neither DH nor SiL can have any more. DS has a few second cousins on both sides (3 each I think)

My young adult kids have been looking ahead recently and bemoaning the fact that big family gatherings might be a thing of the past - dh and I are both one of 5. All his siblings have children (10 between them), 2 of mine do (4 kids) so they have 14 cousins. However, we only have 2 kids, so they've started to realise that in future, when we no longer meet with my/dh's siblings at Christmas (assuming this will happen at some point - maybe when all their kids have children too) there will be just the two of them, their partners, us and however many kids they have. They both want children though - I imagine just a couple each - so if they're able to have them, I think that's a big enough gathering personally!

Women have more options now and many are choosing to not have children or as many children as previous generations. This is a good thing

9 in total, including in-laws…

I have 2 cousins.
my kids only have 1, because my sibling is gay and doesn’t want children, and secondary infertility hit with my husbands sibling. None of that is anyone’s fault; it’s how it is. My DH has 32 first cousins, so he comes from a big family. Despite my great grandparents having 5 and 8 children, this legacy has not bourne more fruit.

My mum was one of 6 and my dad one of 2. All had a least 2 kids each, some 3 or 4 so lots of cousins. I had 2 and my brother had 2 but my sister has had none.

I have 4 cousins in total—2 on each side of my family. My DCs have 6 cousins—3 on my side and 3 on DH’s side.

Am one of 4 children, none of us had kids of our own (two of us because of having cancer and are unable), one because he is a mess and the other, though married, decided they didn't want any.

My partners only sister died when she was 21, of cancer and my partner never had children.

So both of our immediate families stop when we die. We do both have cousins and those cousins have children.

Yes I would say family is shrinking my DH is an only child, I have a younger sibling.
My younger sibling and partner can’t have children sadly.
I have 2 DC and honestly I can’t see me ever having grand children.
I think the younger generation realise how tough it is to have a family in this day and age with costs not only that most now are prioritising their own needs and careers.

There’s 4 of us so far only my DB has kids. I hope to so does my DS DB2 doesn’t want any,
my cousins however have been fruitful so our family lives on 🤣

Until any government put in place good pre/post maternity care, free child nursery places for all and protect women’s rights in the workplace the birthrate will continue to fall.

Not really for me. I have 3 half-siblings and 4 cousins. They each have two children , except for two of my cousins who have none.

I'm quite significantly the youngest in my generation, and I had my two children in my thirties. My children have six cousins from my side of the family, but there's 27 years between the eldest cousin and my youngest child. To the point that my first great-nephew was born six months after my own youngest! My two married 'niblings' currently have 2 children each. We seem to be consistently having two children, or none, on my side.

My husband is one of three, and has (I think) 9 cousins. We've got three 'niblings', and they are very close in age to our children. One of his cousins who we see occasionally also has one child of a similar age. Some of his cousins (who I've not met) have older children, but I'm not sure how many.

My children have 9 first cousins, compared with my 4, but the same number as my husband.

My children have 9 children between them, so I am a busy grandma, which is lovely. My parents and siblings were awful and a lot of NC went on, so really, it's just me and my immediate kids. I like it this way.

Yup, unfortunately, this is the case for many. But some make up for it by having more dc. For example dh youngest of 3. One brother had none, one had one and then we had 3! No hope in more as the others are almost 60. I am one of 2 and my sibling had 2. However, my dad is one of 3 and him and one brother had two the other none. And the other brother that had two, looks unlikely his kids will have any...one of them might have 1 or 2, but the other most likely not. A friend of mine is one of 2 her brother will not have any kids and she has 4..... So it does seem like families are shrinking.

I only really have information about my mum's side. Her parents both had about 4 siblings. They all had about 3 children. My mum has 4 children but her brothers only 2 so I had 4 cousins, together there was 8 of us. So less cousins than my mum had.

I have 3 children but also pregnant with #4. My sisters are 20, 18 and 16 and don't have children yet (I'm 27 so quite a big age difference) so my kids don't have any cousins from my side. The 20 year old wants 3 and the others said they want 1 or 2 so my mum will most likely have more or at least the same number of grandchildren as her parents.

DH's parents had 6 kids but one died without having had children. One sister has 6 kids, other sister has 2 and one brother has 5, youngest brother doesn't have any yet. So that's 13 cousins, 16 (nearly 17) together with my kids. All of DH's aunts and uncles had about 4-6 kids, so his side of the family is getting smaller because of his sister having only 2, and most likely his younger brother won't have a lot either.

Yes

my Grandparents had three kids and six Grandkids. There are only four great grand children though. Unlikely to be any more

On the other side: three kids and five grandkids but still only 5 children between five people