To ask: if you are an occasional cocaine user, are you aware how you appear to others?

[mixandmatch]

I've been thinking about this a lot over the last few weeks so am interested in views.

I don't take any drugs myself and drink very little but am not personally that judgemental about those who indulge more than I do. I have a few friends who smoke weed occasionally, and likewise a few who on a 'big night out' will have some coke. I'm often the least drunk person on a big night out and am fine with that: everyone makes different life choices.

But increasingly I find the cocaine use absolutely unbearable and it made me wonder... do people who occasionally use coke realise how boring, selfish, cold and weird it makes them appear to others? For me, it is a whole different ballgame to drunkenness or even other drug-taking: alcohol makes you slur your words a bit and be more emotional/giggly/free of inhibitions, weed makes you a bit dopey, but I just find coke does something absolutely horrific to people. Plus there is the whole 'sneaking off into the bathroom/shared private joke' thing that I just find incredibly rude and excluding to those who aren't involved. If it's so socially acceptable why not just do it off the dining room table, in the same way you'd happily enjoy a glass of wine alongside teetotallers?

I know that occasional coke use isn't uncommon so I'm just curious: if you either do it or once did it, did you realise it made you like this and just not care, or would you have thought I was the boring party pooper?

Plus there is the whole 'sneaking off into the bathroom/shared private joke' thing that I just find incredibly rude and excluding to those who aren't involved. If it's so socially acceptable why not just do it off the dining room table, in the same way you'd happily enjoy a glass of wine alongside teetotallers?

Because then they'd have to share.

I took it a fair bit in my early twenties in the context of house parties or raves/big club nights. I think it’s a weird drug to be on at a restaurant or at the pub- it makes you want to dance and dance (or at least that’s the effect it had on me). And yes it affects behaviour and demeanour in a strange way- monologuing at people in a disconnected way. When I took it, it was always in loud dance music contexts so everyone was dancing and it was too loud for much conversation! Plus the rest of my group were taking it too, so when we did manage to have a conversation we would just take turns to monologue at each other 😂

I had no idea of the human rights atrocities behind the industry at the time because I was young and foolish, and this was some decades ago. I grew out of it luckily and haven’t taken any for a long time. I think it’s a particularly nasty drug, both because of the ‘industry’ and the damage it does, and also for what it does to the individual. It’s incredibly risky for health, increasingly so as you age I would imagine. It makes people behave like arrogant wankers, it costs ££££ and the comedowns are horrendous. So I don’t miss it and wouldn’t recommend.

Coke turned my ex into a twat. Cold, obnoxious and arrogant. The come down the next day was grim too - no sleep so mean.

Yes to be clear, I don't want to minimise how serious alcohol can be - I know it can ruin lives and destroy families and health etc. But my personal experience is that people can enjoy a few drinks whilst still being relatively 'themselves' whereas coke almost immediately turns people awful.

The dancing point is interesting - I can completely see that if all you're doing is dancing, it doesn't matter. But in an evening at someone's house where those not on coke are expecting some normal conversation... it's not ideal.

They wouldn't have to share it with me, as I don't want any! 😂

Agree with @mindutopia about booze though- groups of tipsy/pissed people can be awful. Groups of drunk men are often lairy and intimidating as well as annoying,; drunk women usually just really, really fucking annoying.

I did my fair share in my youth and during that time I honestly did not give a fuck how I came across

The problem with coke is that it’s EVERYWHERE and so, so normalised in some circles.

I know a lot of people who take it regularly and they’re lawyers, doctors, accountants, journalists etc. Some just dabble, others are high functioning addicts.

I don’t know how we, as a society, take this kind of rich-middle-class addiction seriously. Or if we even should.

So I never tried cocaine in my youth. It was always a “hard” drug in my head that was a definite no.

i now work in substance use and cocaine is rife. The eyewatering cost of daily use and debt is insane! It just seems crazy that people can spend upwards of £500 a day on it!

I think it's become really common among proper grown ups now. Especially in big cities. I hate it as you'd think they actually would give a bit of a fuck how they come across on a night out and also, I always think they're playing roulette with their heart, especially if they mix it with booze.

YABU and unclench. It's just a drug, and it helps some people feel more relaxed. You are also unreasonable to say it is worse than alcohol, it actually isn't.

I used to use coke on occasion. I knew it made me chatty and full on, but I enjoyed it. That said, because I knew the chat was dull as fuck for everyone else I would only take it if the rest of the group was too. Otherwise it's incredibly tedious for other people.

Maybe it's just because you aren't taking it as well. It's really no different from booze. I do both and booze is the one I'm trying to quit!

I think that’s the main difference between coke and ketamine , pills etc. Proper grown ups take coke, as you put it. Parents, senior professionals, - I know someone who takes a line before he goes on live television! Coke is most certainly not just a drug one indulges in in their youth (least of all because of how expensive it is).

Yeah I'm talking mid - late teens, not as a proper adult. Wouldn't touch it now

I used to love taking it

when out clubbing yes it makes people more intense when dancing it off it’s not as bad when standing around chatting at a pub or party it makes people come across as self absorbed arrogant twats

it very much sets the tone and then you are carried on that that’s why so often leads to aggression

This.

Agree with you OP, I think most people know that coke makes you act like an absolute knob but presumably they like the way it makes them feel more.

Now wondering if it's actually the other way round and people with more selfish, arrogant personalities are more likely to do coke 😂

Yes, that's been my experience too. People take it at work or at social events where you're meant to be acting civilised. It isn't just a party drug anymore.

I think it's because it's so easy to get hold of. You just need to look online. In the olden days you needed to know a guy who knew a guy and go round to his flat to pick up. I think they just deliver it to your doorstep now.

Realise I'm getting all "back in my day" aboht class a drugs which is quite funny.

I do not do drugs at all and barely drink either fwiw

This. I am 54 and don’t know anyone who takes it ( that I know of) and I have never been offered it.

I had it a few times when younger and not only found everyone else boring as fuck but also bored myself by chatty absolute bollocks. No thank you!

Yes- even as a very selfish and reckless 20- something, I wouldn’t have taken it to just sit in someone’s lounge- especially if other people weren’t on it. For me it was all about getting that physical high on the dancefloor. The flashing lights and the booming bass from the speakers that you could feel through your whole body- just brilliant. But the following day…urgh.

@UneAnneeSansLumierei am not in any way ‘clenched’ - I’m not morally judging anyone who does coke and I’m sure there are lots of habits I have that they think are less than ideal. But I do think it’s really odd for intelligent grown-ups to take a drug that they know makes them rude and spend half of an evening hiding from their friends in different rooms and then giggling like teenagers with a secret. If it’s so fine/better than alcohol, why not just say ‘I’m off for a line, back in a minute’ and then chat openly about it on return? This is the reason I started the thread: to ask whether people who do coke are aware of how rude and self absorbed they appear whilst doing it?

Yeah not for me. Makes you come off really badly - could never live down the shame if I did it at work dos the way some people do! Ranting nonstop about inappropriate nonsense. One guy exploded at everyone, suddenly saying he was a VIP and too good for this and that. Honestly my worst nightmare to behave like that.

alcohol and cocaine completely different ; one is suppressant (chill effect) the other stimulant (robotic, focused ). Very different pathways in the brain involved , so it’s like comparing apples with beef!