To give myself box room?

[freshstartere]

My marriage broke down a couple of years ago, exh was emotionally/psychologically abusive and I can't see myself ever wanting to be in a relationship again. I just have zero interest. I am still reasonable young - early 30s.

The kids are with me 90% of the time and we have 3 bedrooms, one large, one medium, one small. I was planning on redecorating their rooms this year as they're getting older and it occurred to me why am I in my room? I don't do anything in there except sleep and they would really benefit from being bumped up a room size so DD2 from box room to medium, DD1 from medium to large.

I can't think of any reason not to except it goes against the norm?

ugh - title should read 'to give myself the box room'

I did exactly that when it was ds and I in a 2 bedroom house. He had the largest room as spent time 'in his room' where like you I literally slept in mine. It definitely works and you still have the separate space to sleep in.

I would probably do the same in your situation actually, and then as the kids grow up and live out start moving back up rooms again lol

I know another single parent that did this.

Entirely your decision.

Plus they will have space to study it for play dates etc

I have noticed as an adult I don’t spend time in my room like I did as a kid and teen, like you it is just for sleeping

I moved downstairs so they can have own space

We moved downstairs for similar reasons. Whatever makes the kids more comfortable

I did something similar about 8 years ago - my two boys had the two big bedrooms and I moved. Just made more sense…you have to use your space to suit you and your family.

My friend had 4 siblings.

The largest bedroom had 3 youngest siblings, with partitions made by bookcases etc.

Friend and older sibling had medium sized room.

Mum and dad in a double bed that just squished in to the box room.

It's was common back then 60s/70s with larger families.

Go for it, they probably spend more time in their rooms than you do in yours and will continue to do so as they get older. Will it give you enough storage space for clothes etc? I assume you have a downstairs space you can spend time in - living room or similar? I suppose the only thing to make sure of is that you have somewhere in the house that you can relax.

We have the box room! We made the same decision about three years ago. I mean, it's not the same as having our old room as we can only fit our bed (no walk around room) and a bedside table - dh has the windowsill as his table, we've had to take the door off and install a folding door and we have a chest of drawers on the landing for our clothes, and my dressing table has been given to our dd and mine is disguised in the living room. But, the kids have so much more space. They can have friends over, they have room for sleepovers and they really enjoy their bigger rooms. It won't be forever though and one day, we'll have a bigger room again!

I don’t see why not. We are having similar discussions about downsizing our bedroom to give the kids the bigger ones in the house because we don’t use our bedrooms for much other than sleeping and getting dressed, but they use them for sleepovers, play dates, just playing by themselves, doing their crafts and stuff at their desk, etc. It’s all about best use of space, isn’t it? And that will be individual to each family, so if works for you then that’s all that matters.

I think you could make a small bedroom really quite cosy too!

I did this a few years ago for similar reasons and it's great. I do use the big cupboard in largest bedroom to store various stuff like camping kit, a few long dresses of mine etc that don't fit elsewhere.

My sister did this. Her kids are 13 and 16.

Do you have enough space for your things?

And would you want it back once they're teenagers and stay up late either friends?

yeah I think I'm definitely going to do it now, there's no reason not to! I do have downstairs, it's not huge but if I wanted space to set up a hobby etc then I could. I do think it would be nice for them to be able to have friends over too and have lovely space to play.

I wouldn’t, unless you’re very sure.

The kids will go to university and you’ll be lest the smallest room. It will be hard to take back the large room.

And of course, if DD2 has always had the smaller room, why not give her the large room and DD1 stay in the medium one?

My parents had the tiny bedroom when I was a kid. They had the rest of the downstairs too really - particularly as we got older we would hang out in our rooms a lot. They were massive and we could have sleepovers, Lego setups, whatever. My parents just used their room to sleep and would hang out in the living room or kitchen.

Currently looking at houses post divorce, and I would do the same. The only thing stopping me is that young DC still get in bed with me most nights and we couldn’t do that in a single.

Edited to add that I’d make a single out of kallax units for extra storage, and commandeer some storage in DC rooms if need be.

There was a thread about box rooms a few months ago: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/home_decoration_pictures/5426160-show-me-your-cosy-box-rooms?page=1

I wouldn't. It suggests a hierarchy where the kids are the most important people in the house and therefore get more than thier mother.

Plus you may eventually end up in another relationship or have friends/family to stay.

I would - then sort of have the rest of the house to myself without their clutter and mess everywhere. Win-win!

I did this when I had a 2 bedroom place, and my DC shared the larger room. You can get some great storage solutions these days! I got a small double bed with storage underneath it, a wardrobe with a sliding door, and shelves with baskets on for some of my smaller clothes and toiletries etc.