AIBU to think this is unhygienic?

[ohohokeydokey]

My DM was standing in the kitchen near the sink wearing rubber sliders and long wide leg trousers that trail on the ground.

She was getting ready to make some lunch, then suddenly puts her bare foot up on the counter next to the drying rack where the clean dishes are sitting. She used to do ballet as a kid so is flexible enough to just kinda chill there like that which is what she did.

Knowing her I knew she wouldn't wipe down the surface or anything and would just go on and put the dishes away and make lunch. So I said in the gentlest, most polite voice possible asked her if she could not put her foot on the counter.

She rolled her eyes at me and left her foot up there for another several minutes😭 Then said her back hurts. She has a bad back, so that's normal for her to say.

As I was leaving the room she said under her breath but definitely making sure it was loud enough for me to hear "I've just been in the shower you know."

She had a shower about an hour and a half ago, she's wearing trousers that she also wore yesterday to the supermarket, on a walk etc and they trail on the ground.

I replied "Sorry, but it's still unhygienic to put your foot on the counter next to clean dishes."

She huffed and sighed, then took that foot down and put her other foot up on the other side of the counter and started doing the dishes like that.

I know this sounds semi hilarious now that I'm writing it out, but please someone tell me whether or not I'm being unreasonable for asking her to remove her bare foot from the clean kitchen counter?

Am I being unreasonable to think it's unhygienic too? I know she showered this morning, but surely I'm not the only one who thinks this is gross?

What your mother did, is in my opinion, minging!

Is he in the fridge door 😳? Now that's unhygienic. And he's Lilliputian...

Away with your logic and common sense

I think it’s not a considerate thing to do in a shared kitchen. But if the floor isn’t too dirty then I would think it’s fine. Coming from a place with a toddler who has hands on the floor and in her mouth all the time so I’m careful about areas which have shoes and the bathroom, but I can’t get worked up about it anywhere else.

Well, feet are feet. Not many germs can be transmitted if she has healthy feet, and assuming you don’t eat from the sink/draining board.

It would bother me. I wouldn’t be thrilled to find hair in my food in a restaurant, or see the chef in a restaurant with their feet up on the counters. Would feel similar about any kitchen I was eating from - including my own. As an aside: that’s amazing your MIL is so flexible!

I don’t think it’s too unhygienic, but would be repulsed by it and want to wipe down after. Is she trying to make a point of proving she’s still flexible?

I think it's amazing. Your clever mum. More than just a bit of ballet, I think? If it's your counter she shouldn't have done it, if it's her's then it's up to her. Wipe it surreptiously if you are that bothered. Assume sliders and floor are both clean, of course!

Never mind the kitchen gymnastics, your mum’s dress sense sounds highly questionable.

Unless of course she’s your mom, when it makes sense.

😀

YANBU . Kitchen worktops are for food preparation. it drives me bananas when people put unsanitary objects, eg. handbags or shopping bags that have been on the floor of tubes/buses, on the worktop that I'm just about to cook/eat off.

other rank habits :

1. I've had two colleagues in two separate workplaces who would clip their toenails at their desk in a shared office. The hill I will die on is that this should be a sacking (or capital) offence.

2. DP flosses teeth in bed. the inevitable consequence is that little bits of food covered in saliva and bacteria will be sprayed on the bed linen. Just because they're too small to see doesn't mean they're not there. The only place tooth flossing (and for the most part, brushing) should be done is in a bathroom with a tiled floor. bedroom / living room / any room with carpet = Gross.

The bare foot I wouldn’t care about tbh. Dirty Shoes or trousers I would. People climb on counters all the time to reach high cupboards.

Why are you eating off a counter? Use a chopping board and then a plate like other people do

Is your mother Angela Rippon? She sounds extremely lithe. I’d be meh about the foot.

In the kitchen! I wouldn't brush my hair in the kitchen- on the contrary- I attach it as to not shredding hair on food

I can do it and I'm 70 thanks to pilates and ballet.

Yes that's unhygienic I wouldn't be happy about it I would get some antibacterial wipes or spray and clean it down and ask her not to do it again if it's in your house that is

I always sit on the counter.
I sometimes stand on them and I’ve even had sex on the counter.

I don’t put food directly on the counter though and I’d use a clean chipping board etc and I wipe the surfaces down before and after I prep food.

Its obviously not ideal but I think you’re making a bigger deal out of it then it needs to be - I am assuming her feet weren’t touching any of the clean dishes.

Me too, late sixties. I love a good stretch using the counter as a barre.
I imagine the average hand has far more bacteria on it than a foot.

It’s not polite to put your feet (in or out of shoes) somewhere others put their hands - eg counter tops, door handles, tables.

By all means do it in your own home, but if others are around or you are in someone else’s house, then no.

It was her own home albeit shared with the OP.

I'm not a fussy person at all, and quite untidy. However used to clash with MIL over actual hygiene issues- she would stick her fingers in food to taste, for example, once when I was heavily pregnant and she had a cold. Her floors were filthy to the extent the that the kids' socks were black after a day in the house. I do think it's weird to put your foot on a shared kitchen counter and in some cultures it would be shockingly taboo. Yanbu.

You obviously get on well !!....not.

You are

I think she is brilliant. She is your mother and can perform a stretch like this with her legs. She has a bad back. I think if you actually liked her you would have no problem with this. That she said quietly that she had had a shower recently is very telling. I think you bully her and could be more understanding. It would be better for both of you.

She sounds very childish