Food waste hysteria has gone too far

[Nifty50something]

Of course it's wrong that vast quantities of food is a wasted when some people don't have enough to eat. Restaurants and supermarkets who throw away perfectly good food past it's sell by date instead of donating it should be ashamed. And we should all try to use up the food we buy of we can. But some people are so far up on their high horse about food waste nowadays it's ridiculous

For example I was on a group holiday on half board and went out for lunch with a friend as well as her friend who I didn't know previously but who had come along on the holiday. I ordered a sandwich but could only eat about half of it and left the rest on my plate. The friend of a friend had taken a roll and some bacon from the breakfast buffet so hadn't ordered anything at the restaurant. She asked me if I was going to finish my food and when I said no she said she would have it because "food waste is wrong." She ate it, saving the bacon roll she had taken which she had for lunch the following day. She didn't offer to pay towards my sandwich or say thank you or anything. It was all done in a very judgemental way

When I talked to my friend about it she agreed with me that her friend had been rude but then added she didn't agree with food waste either. I asked her what I was meant to do and she said in future my friend and I could order one sandwich and share it. I was fine with this but sometimes would have liked to order something different from my friend, have something other than a sandwich, etc. But felt constrained to share because restaurants served such big portions.

AIBU and what do you do if you can't eat all the food you're served? If it's convenient for me I'll take the rest away to have later but that doesn't always work.

You don't have a clue about the implications of food waste, and why there is so much talk about it. Educate yourself about the topic you're posting about, because your post makes little sense and only shows your ignorance.

The friend of a friend was a bit rude in being judgemental, but I wouldn’t expect a song and dance of asking if you minded her taking something you’d already said you were going to leave and thanking you for it or offering to pay half. I think you’re letting your annoyance about her being generally frugal financially whilst away and (I presume) not knowing or liking her that well cloud your view on all that.

I don’t like wasting food, particularly animal products, I don’t go overboard about a scoop of peas or a spare roast potato but if I’m still hungry I’ll eat a friend’s leftover meat, and if I have it leftover over I’ll take it home.

If it’s salvageable I always take uneaten food home (eg half a sandwich in good condition). If the leftovers are a mess then I leave it.

Why would you rather it went in a bin then in your friends stomach?
If nobody wants the leftovers or they're too messy to take in a doggy bag then fine to throw away.

But what's the point of moaning when someone wants to eat something you've rejected?

You can't really take it 'too far' unless someone was scooping the contents of a bin into a tupperware?!

Or you could just stay at home and weigh out your frozen peas making sure none rolled on the floor.

I don't like food waste either but leaving half a sandwich you can't finish isn't a big thing. As an overweight person who was forced as a child to finish everything on my plate, I now give myself permission to "waste" a bit of food.

Your friend though she just sounds like a cheap person in all senses and the type you can't bring anywhere.

@User7854653 I think that's unfair. Firstly, although some parents may be using food waste as an excuse to punish their children, I doubt that's the reason for most. Many families simply don't have money to spare at the moment and if it's been spent on food (and therefore isn't available for something else, like paying a bill, buying new school shoes etc) and the food is then wasted, then I don't think you can accuse those parents of being abusive if they then lecture their kids on the evils of wasting food, or even punish them in a reasonable way.

Secondly, it isn't really true that wating food has zero implications. Food waste is a huge contributor to greenhouse gas emissions - from the water and fertilizer used to grow the food, to the fuel used to harvest, transport and process it, to the methane it produces as it rots. In fact, according to the UN, food waste contibutes 8-10% of annual greenhouse gas emissions! I'm not surprised some people are raging about that. It's easy to loftily claim that "their beliefs stemmed from unpleasant totalitarian upbringing and seeing others throw out food triggers a huge amount of trauma for themselves", but it's not necessarily true - they may just have concern for the planet and and what we are all doing to it. Food waste is actually quite an easy environmental win - we can all make changes at very little personal cost to reduce it.

You ate half a sandwich and you were full?!

I doubt this was 'hysteria'. Just a thinly veiled display of tightwaddery. Likely too ashamed to say she wants to take some food to eat the following day so made you feel bad instead.

If it was me, I would have probably wrapped it up to take away and eat later - assuming the filling was appropriate and I had a large enough bag. Otherwise I would have been quite happy for this other woman to take it, better than throwing away, and paying for something someone else has rejected would have been odd.

I’ve just thrown out some of our Christmas stash - opened pre-made salads, dips and pate. I felt guilty but I was getting a stomach ache from the high fat content. A lesson for next year.

Im confused what's wrong with your friend having the other half of your sandwich? My sister usually leaves some food at a restaurant - always has, always will. Ill usually finish her chips or have some pasta, whatever she hasn't finished. Unless its steak as she eats it blue/rare.. yuck. I've never once thought to offer her any money. Maybe I'm the weird one?! 😂😂

@User7854653I think you're stretching things a bit there. I grew up in a family where you ate what you were given and was expected to clear your plate, especially if you wanted dessert. I wasn't abused or mistreated, but food wasn't a luxury to be wasted. Guess what? I still eat pretty much what's put in front of ne, even if I don't especially like it, and I create very little food waste myself.
@Nifty50somethingI think friend of a friend comes across as more of a tight arse than a manic food waste hater, but I think it's more a case of ignore and move on.

She just sounds tight and bit of a chancer and is using food waste as an excuse to get a free lunch.

In defence of leftovers on plates at hotel buffet breakfasts though - sometimes it LOOKS nice but you bite into it and it's awful. Like, gross awful...

sausages and bacon are often the main culprits of this.

Who can't eat a full sandwich??

For me that is the craziest part of your post.

Cafe or restaurant sandwiches can be quite big, especially if you've had a hotel breakfast.

So I only eat half a sandwich now and again but would definitely take the other half in a doggie bag for one of us to eat later (DS will usually be scavenging for something late afternoon)

Me too.

As a child I was expected to eat everything on my plate - both at home and at primary school.

I don’t consider that I had an abusive or traumatic childhood. What I did have were two parents who had been brought up during the Second World War and to whom all food was a precious commodity. They hated food waste and I agree with them.

It seems to be much more acceptable than it used to be to ask for a doggy bag, and that is a very good thing in my opinion.

A really common punishment that many people have mentioned on MN was their parents keeping any unfinished meals and forcing the children to eat it up the next day. From a child's perspective, it's obviously much easier to rationalise this behaviour as the concept of food wastage being inherently wrong rather than their parents being cruel monsters who enjoyed abusing them.

It depends on stomach size and what's been eaten for breakfast! You do get that there are a number of variables when it comes to appetite, right?

I don’t think she’s tight, I think she’s annoyed at blatant food waste. As I would be. Why do people spin it to look like she’s stingy or unhinged or desperate for food…some people can’t stand the waste.

At risk of being accused of drip feeding - it was one of those big doorstop-type sandwiches and it was served with chips. I feel like I eat a fairly normal amount of food. I'm 5'3" and weigh 10.5 stone so I'm a pretty average weight. And I would never be judgemental about people eating more than me.

We have very little food waste at home. I cook what we will eat for each meal, if I make extra it's a whole meal extra for another day. I never force or even encourage my children to finish food if they say they are full as this damages the ability to self regulate and can cause issues long term.
I would leave unwanted food in a restaurant and consider this small amount of waste ok. I would probably have taken the half sandwich with me.
I think the biggest domestic issue with food waste is over shopping rather than leaving a bit when eating out.

In a developed country where the majority of adults are actually obese, domestic food wastage is simply not a problem. Full stop.

There are obviously many issues related to overconsumption in general but those aren't confined to perishable food alone. But oddly enough, people who are critical of non-perishable overconsumption (plastics, fast fashion etc) are simply not as aggressive, angry and triggered as those who are only concerned about food. So clearly, the psychology that leads someone to develop extreme black and white views around food waste are rooted in far darker places than just informed activism.

Yes, it's an instinct for survival, one that is seen in other animals as well. It's facilitated in humans by the evolving of a stomach that can expand, a general instinct to find sweet, high fat and generally high calorie foods palatable and even for a sweet item - a dessert - to be manageable after a full meal. Being able to eat more than is strictly necessary for that moment enables the body to lay down essential fat stores, to build up reserves of fat soluble vitamins, minerals and other nutrients, to build and grow muscle and bones.

The reason why obesity is so difficult to combat is that it's working against human instinct and biological imperatives to consume as much as possible when the opportunity arises - because your unconscious brain and body might not get to eat again (and why it's seen as virtuous to restrict food in both type and quantity - it wouldn't be a sacrifice to fast for 40 days if it were easy - and then other bits of brain chemistry step in, the feelings of energy and clarity or pleasure/religious ecstasy that are vaunted as advantages/the presence of supernatural beings are the body flooding with chemicals to give the starving/fasting person the energy and determination to be able to seek out food before they die).

So yeah, somebody who isn't certain when or if they're going to eat again will tend, either consciously or unconsciously, to take advantage of a current abundance in anticipation or fear of a famine later.

I don't think there is too much hysteria about food waste. I get the impression a lot of people don't give a shit about it (certainly going by the amount of perfectly decent food people chuck in our communal bins).
You met one person who was a bit rude about it.
But if I'd not been able to finish the sandwich I would have asked if anyone else at the table wanted to finish it off and if not I'd have taken it home for later. So maybe you aren't "hysterical" enough about food waste.