So I posted about getting engaged and not wanting my sister's boyfriend to attend. They've since had a child and my wedding is this coming summer. I'm rambling Because I can't complain anymore to my fiance or my friends. It's unfair to them and I've really let this all get under my skin way too much.
And I really need this rant.
I've avoided him for the last 18 months as much as possible. If it's a big family group I can bear it because there are a lot of people around. But things have only gotten worse for me. I normally attend Christmas with my mother and my kids. She lives alone and we've always had Christmas together. Usually it's my whole family (Siblings plus) but their families have grown in size so much, the last couple of years it's just been the four the us. This year in our sister group chat we were discussing Christmas day. My sister and the boyfriend wanted to have Christmas with my mam. However my mother has made it clear she took cannot stand this bf. None of my family can but some are better "passing themselves" more than others. Anyway she wanted dinner with my mam because she wanted Christmas with her family but wanted other people to come as buffers because her boyfriend was going to come and she's aware of how my mother feels about him. Her words. When my mother and I spoke my mother had agreed to hosting them because she was under the impression my kids and I would still come regardless. I said I would not be attending Christmas this year as I didn't want to spend it with him. My mother obviously relayed some of this information to my sister because she basically asked me straight out of her boyfriend wasn't coming would I be having dinner at home. I was caught of guard and said not exactly. They made other arrangements and went to his family and I had dinner with my mam. My mam is getting older now so I helped cook dinner as much as she would allow. She is a particular woman to say the least.
My sister and her boyfriend visited my mother that evening. And my sister basically listed out all the components of the dinner I was in charge of asking my mother how were they? Eh how was the ham? And the stuffing? Ect ect And it dawned on me that my sister is gone more like her boyfriend.
If I was to talk about individual events some are straight out nasty and others could be considered "him trying" but to be perfectly honest he is just overbearing and condensing.
He will never have a back and forth conversation. He just tells you things. It's hard to give an example but I still live in the town I was born in. So I am familiar with it all. He is only living in it about two years. But he'll tell me all about it like I've never been. And everything is the best thing ever.
When he asked my daughter about her Christmas present, one was a trip to London for three night. He basically just told her everywhere she had to go and see and do and getting stupid things up on his phone to show her. And it's not in a nice and interested way. It's an I know best way. It's all just too much for me now. It was my daughters birthday yesterday too. We took her out for a meal and I invited my mother and my sister (she's godmother) and obviously her boyfriend was invited too. I was willing to pass myself for the sake of my daughter and Christmas. But they basically came in. Shoved my kids out of their seats and just began to tell us things. No real back and forth conversation. The boyfriend spoke about how he found this delicious wine that we must try because we are going to love it. Insisted on looking it up on line to show us .... My fiance doesn't even bloody drink wine and said this during the conversation but it's just ignored.
I know I've rambled on but I'm just so annoyed and had to get it off my chest. Probably doesn't make sense but basically I'm really annoyed and pissed off that not only does she ignore these things about him. When he can be incredibly offensive she just thinks he can be a bit annoying and tries too hard. But now She's not turning into him!!! And I really just do not want to be around him at all but now that she's turning into him it just makes our relationship more strained . And I don't know what to do