AIBU to think Christmas with small children is not fun?

[Tiredallthetime7]

Why does nobody talk about how utterly shit Christmas with young children is?

First time Mum to a 2 year old, his behaviour has been incredibly difficult recently with throwing things at people (I'm talking books etc not just light things), hitting, scratching, tantrums over everything, constant twining. Any attempt at nice activities e.g. doing what he wants to do like going to the beach or out for cake just make him act more spoilt!

Since finishing work all I've done is raise my voice and shout at him, all the festivities and nice feelings I had in mind literally feel very far removed from reality. Yet social media makes it look and sound like everyone is having a precious time.

AIBU to think that Christmas with children this young is actually just a bit shit?

It’ll be lovely from next year when your child recalls about Santa etc from this year. I think between about 3-7 are the most fun ages.

My youngest is 3 and it's been lovely this year. Lots of chatter about Santa getting down the chimney and how will he know she's been good. We had fun when the dcs were younger too, it was nice to take them out and marvel at pretty lights and watch the dancing in pantos. Toddlers will have tantrums but you just take the rough with the smooth.

Im really sorry you’re having such a tough time that happens to be coinciding with Christmas, hopefully it is but a short phase. I can’t say I agree with the general sentiment of your post but I can understand why you’re finding it hard. Best wishes.

It’s hard at that age. And then gets fun from about 3 to about 8/9. And then shit again. Mine are 14 and 22 and basically want nothing to do with us except to be fed / have an endless supply of food and to have presents. Shut in their own rooms most of the time. It’s not very festive! I’ve taken them out for dinner a couple of times, suggested going for a walk / Christmas market etc and nope, everyone moody. Fun times! Take me back to the days of leaving out mince pies and making it look like reindeer have eaten carrots.

2 is a hard age and they aren't really aware of Santa yet either so you don't even have the fun of that. Next year will be better!

I have one the same age. It's fucking gruelling, the hardest age yet, I find a day at home together almost impossible to endure. I think they are just too young for Christmas at this age.

2 year olds are dicks
Honestly it will be a little better next year. Mine are now 4 & 6 and whilst we haven't done much since they finished school last week the chatter and magic has been wonderful. Ask me last year and I'd have said it was hard work.

This hasn't been my experience at all.

My DC are 19 and 17, and both absolutely love xmas. We spend a lot of time together enjoying the festivities, and the older one enjoys having fun with their friends also.

When mine were younger, I found it all very, very hard. The excitement and the build-up to xmas was all too much, plus the bickering and squabbling, meltdowns and the noise. The adverts and films really don't tell you the truth. It's a difficult time of year!

He’s 2, they’re complete fuckers. Not smart enough to explain anything to and still incredibly self oriented. Zero idea of other people.

Does anyone else have a 4yo who is still oblivious to Christmas? He likes the Christmas tree and he's enjoyed having an advent calendar, but he doesn't actually seem too bothered about Santa coming, reindeers, elves etc. He only wants to talk about/to Spiderman. If I mention Santa he will listen for a minute but he doesn't have any questions, particularly.

Anyway I also have a 15 month old, OP, and yes Christmas is hard work with LO, I guess the thing is it becomes like any other day, you are still having to work hard entertaining them, they still only want to eat Peppa pig yoghurts and nothing else, they still scream when they don't get their own way. When my son was 2, he woke up at 4am on Christmas day. Not because he knew it was Christmas, he had no idea. We decided to go for a walk on the beach at 7am and it started to rain. He had a tantrum through Christmas dinner. That really was a crappy Christmas 😂

2, 2 and a half isn't great as they aren't really aware of what's going on, just disrupted. Just lower your expectations. 3 is better depending on the kid and 4 is pretty lovely at Christmas as they are old enough to buy into it.

Yes, I remember it being really hard. It only gets better from there on - I mean there are hard bits, but the joy outweighs it from 3ish onwards.

My 12 year old is giddy as a goat with excitement- but it’s less pressured as no need to keep up the Santa myth!

With my eldest it started getting enjoyable when he was 4 (he's 5 now). My youngest is nearly 3 and kinda gets what's going on but if Santa didn't come tonight, he wouldn't remember. So it's far more enjoyable with the 5 year old who can chat and get excited and fully understands. The 3 year is old is along for the ride but also gets way more overstimulated and exhausted with all the change... So it's much harder. I much prefer Christmas when they're that bit older! I'm hoping next Christmas will be better with my youngest as he'll be nearly 4

Mine is four and a half. He was hard work last year (3 and a half) and I remember doing father Christmas randomly in the afternoon as he didn't really get it.
This year he is too excited to sleep but is being quite cute as he is into it.

Age 6mo and 18mo were absolutely awful. 2.5y was a lot better. 3.5y has been really lovely so far (although baby sister has been cranky all afternoon) so I think things should start looking up for you soon!

Honestly, I don’t love it. Admitting that seems to be inviting judgement on me as a sour, miserable person and the opposite is honestly true … but my five year old ds has a birthday the week before Christmas. Since he turned three, we’ve had parties - I know this is our choice but it’s because otherwise his birthday gets eclipsed totally by Christmas. So we have one load of toys in and then another load on Christmas. By the time he’s opening grandparents’ presents, he is just manically ripping into things.

It makes me really, really uncomfortable but I don’t know how to change it tbh.

DD is nearly two and a half and doesn’t understand anything. I’ve tried to keep it all low key but the dark nights and the cold mean we’re inside a lot more and I think that’s showing. I also am not the biggest fan of parenting my children together so two full weeks of this isn’t really my idea of fun.

I am looking forward to spring. Easter … why don’t we make more of a thing about Easter!?

My kids are 3 7 and 10. I forget how feral they become in the week before Christmas, and every year I’m reminded. They get over hyped and loud. For some reason they’ve taken to lobbing things across this house this week, I’ve told them not to throw at least 20 times today. The usually well behaved toddler bit the middle one on the face today for no reason and then screamed for 30 minutes that santa would know.

They will be lovely tomorrow but there’s something about the lead up to Christmas that turns them into gremlins

Yeah, 2 is a bit shit.

It gets way more fun when they’re 3/4 and then it’s mega exciting x

2 is a bit young to have any real understanding of what it's all about and changes in routine and activities can leave them feeling unsettled. I would just take the pressure off yourself and him and try and keep to his routine as much as possible. As far as tantrums and throwing things goes, stay calm, remove anything he tries to throw and ignore as much as possible, go and do something in the kitchen and don't give the tantrum any attention. Once it's over, don't give a lecture about why we must be kind etc etc - it really is wasted on a 2 year old. Just cheerfully say 'right, shall we sit down and read a book/shall we go in the garden/let's play with the duplo and carry on with your day. If you don't give attention to tantrums, they will diminish over time as your child realises it doesn't get them what they want (your attention)

3 onwards is fab, my eldest is 12 and still get excited. Youngest is 5 and this is my favourite year for him really properly understanding, counting down the days and getting super excited

My 4 year old has had so many tantrums today because excitement is not that far away from upset.

I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I've always found Christmas a lovely time with the children, but I don't feel pressured to do all the things, i just go with the flow. Just do what you can, sounds like you are in a difficult phase but this will pass. Merry Christmas

My ds was so loud today I actually messaged DH to say I think we need to test his hearing.

We were in a museum and he was yelling nonsense at me ‘mummy … mummy … this, this … mummy this …’ top of his voice, just omg shush!

Two years old is hard work. A lot of the 'fun' Christmas stuff is not really understandable to them, usually too busy and long queues. Rein in your expectations and stick to normal routines as much as possible. It will get easier.

I think PPs are right - it starts to be fun when they’re about 3/4.

In the same way as holidays, though, I think ALOT depends on whether you and your partner work well as a team (ie whether or not they’re a bit selfish!)