AIBU to think Christmas with small children is not fun?

[Tiredallthetime7]

Why does nobody talk about how utterly shit Christmas with young children is?

First time Mum to a 2 year old, his behaviour has been incredibly difficult recently with throwing things at people (I'm talking books etc not just light things), hitting, scratching, tantrums over everything, constant twining. Any attempt at nice activities e.g. doing what he wants to do like going to the beach or out for cake just make him act more spoilt!

Since finishing work all I've done is raise my voice and shout at him, all the festivities and nice feelings I had in mind literally feel very far removed from reality. Yet social media makes it look and sound like everyone is having a precious time.

AIBU to think that Christmas with children this young is actually just a bit shit?

Hello! I do! DC is not long 4 and has loved all the activities and stories about Santa and the reindeer etc etc and has asked for a specific gift (when pushed!!) but certainly hasn’t grasped the ‘Santa comes on Christmas Eve’ concept and is very unfussed about presents - their present sack has been sitting in the spare room for weeks and they’re totally unbothered about trying to open them, though will enjoy doing so when told tomorrow (and no this isn’t because they’re freakishly well behaved, it’s that the penny has dropped!). They do have mild language delay so I wonder if that’s part of it and next year will really be when they get it. Either way, they’ll have a lovely day tomorrow but your post has made me feel better as loads of people are talking about their 3 year olds totally understanding the Santa concept and I’m like I can’t relate 😭

@Allswellthatendswelll thank you - mine is also 4.5, but a bit oblivious really. All the other kids in his class seem so much more aware of what's going on around them.

Oh thanks @GoodGollyMissDolly yes my son is the same! There's a huge mound of wrapped presents in my room, which I haven't bothered to hide as he won't notice them/wouldn't think to open them.

Erm a nice lady asked him what he'd asked Santa to bring, and he said "a gun" 😂

I'm kind of hoping he'll get it more next year as well. DP and I are beginning to suspect ND for various reasons however, so we'll see! Glad I'm not the only one with a 4yo who is more in their own little world 💙

This thread has surprised me. Not my experience at all. DD is 2 in March and loving Christmas. She is constantly talking about Santa and his elves and Is skipping around pretending to be an angel. We've enjoyed looking at Christmas lights, singing Christmas carols - she's learned the words to a couple. She was also really into the advent calendar and baking. It's been fun but I'm hoping it's going to be even better over the next few years.

A true MN prodigy!

What my kid enjoyed most around Xmas at that age was taking him for a walk in the neighborhood after early dinner and watch the Christmas decorations of the houses around us (we are lucky most neighbours go all out). We could easily spend couple of hours doing that and then go back and get ready for bed.

You shouldn’t be shouting at a 2 year old.

I am afraid I lost my patience with mine yesterday. I’d been kind, gentle, named the feelings ‘I know you’re frustrated …’ done all the right things, but we lurched from one tantrum to another and I did lose my patience when she went again.

She’s been lovely today so no permanent damage. I agree shouting isn’t optimal but there are times it happens and I’m not going to pretend to be a perfect parent; I’m a bloody good one, though.

I get that, I have a 5 year old and I do shout sometimes when I’ve told or asked him something 500 times but I just think 2 is way too young and they don’t understand.

YANBU but I promise it gets better! I actually posted on here for my son's first christmas because I couldn't believe how utterly shit it was, but DS is 3 now and this year has been wonderful. This is the first year he's properly understood about Santa, and he had a blast today putting out the mince pie and carrot etc. We've done lots of lovely Santa visits and Christmas things and watching him get so excited has made it magical for us too. Hang on, better Christmases are coming!

Yeah 2 is a tricky age but it will get better and more fun. Mine are coming out of the fun stage (9 and 12) and just want never ending food, presents and to be left with their devices. We managed to drag them out for a meal earlier which, horror of horrors, we walked to as it was just down the road. But, despite initial whinging they did enjoy it so that was a win.

My DDs were about 4 before they really understood Father Christmas and all that goes with it. At 2 they didn't understand at all although they obviously enjoyed the presents. I remember the run up to Christmas being really hard when they were 2. The routine was different (there's no other time a tree in the house is normal), time off nursery and it was just hard work. Load's better when they started school as they knew what was going on and enjoyed things like going to see Father Christmas and looking at light displays.
I'm not sure DS will ever really understand about Father Christmas due to his autism. He's 5 and hasn't shown any interest in Christmas yet.

Honestly I think it’s a nightmare until they stop believing. I’m sure I’ll get a lot of parents who say “oh but the magic!” and yes that is sweet.

But I’m watching my brothers and sisters dealing with kids who have been hyper and overly excited for the last six weeks (thanks to Christmas being shoved down their throats at school), their behaviour has got worse and worse, the shit weather means they’ve mainly been cooped up inside and all of the activities have got so expensive. Today they’ve had to deal with kids who are so excited they’re super emotional and tomorrow they’ll be exhausted and unregulated. Come Boxing Day they’ll be gutted it’s over and still on a come down. They’ve spent their night prepping footsteps from Santa and getting all the presents sorted, it’s 9:45 and they’ve got to go to bed because their kids will be up super early, and then they have to deal with the chaos of the day at someone else’s house tomorrow.

Meanwhile I’m child free tucked up on the sofa with a good book and a tub of quality street! It all seems a little too much for me.

Hi op your two year old sounds like mine and guess what they do grow out of it. 3 onwards things calm down and he’s now adorable and I love spending time with him.

Soeech delay and lack of understanding contributes to them throwing things. They like
the reaction and tend to use it as a communication tool. He will outgrow it and your relationship will get better just hang in there.

In the meantime try and accept who he is and everytime he does something naughty distract him x lots of hugs for you x

I am with you on this. I don’t think Christmas in the way we celebrate it now is at all good for children, or possibly anybody.

Oh how I hate to be the bearer of bad news …… these are the best years !! You won’t realise it now but there’s no pressure you can just do what you like ….. as they get older they decide the things they like which quite often means batteries/queueing/lots of bits …. As they get older you have to convince them to do things, presents get smaller and more expensive, then they start going out so you worry all over Christmas where they are and what they are doing.

literally just enjoy it.

It feels like a lot of the things that made it magic when I was younger have gone. I remember baking with my mum, the magic of presents “appearing”, watching a Santa tracker on the computer on the rare occasion we were allowed to use it and meeting Santa at the school Christmas grotto.

one of my brothers has shelled out for about seven Christmas experiences this year - grottos, skating, Santa, Lapland, elves to visit the house, the list goes on. It’s all a bit too commercial and show-y for me now.

It only really started being properly fun with my eldest from about 3 - before that they're too young and it's just difficult being out of their routine. Now my eldest is 5 and it's better than any Christmas I'd had in years.

???

I am so sorry but this made me laugh 🤣🤣🤣

Constantly talking about Santa and his elves at under 2 😂

He's in his terrible twos, and that won't stop for christmas.
Ride it through, keep up strict boundaries, show him attention when he needs it and it'll all get easier next year and christmas will be magical

I am still waiting for the fun and mine is nearly four!

Your point? I have an early talker, not a prodigy, who has me reading "Santa's first Christmas" multiple times a day. So yeah, everything is "just like Santa" ... No different from toddlers who are obsessed with Bluey.

I loved Christmas when my child was that young. But all children are different. Not sure what feelings you though you'd be having, maybe lessen your expectations