To leave toddler in the car while I collect sibling from school?

[peekabooiseeyouhere]

For context, small rural school, not a dangerous area in the slightest.

Caveat, haven’t done this yet. But it would make life a lot easier …

How do you cope with the risk of carrying your toddler across a busy and chaotic school car park?

Clearly you have already made your mind up, as 'loads of others do it' 🙄
So just crack on. Why bother asking on here though ? You clearly think you're not being unreasonable

The poll result tells you most people think you're in the wrong, and are lax about the safety and welfare of your toddler.

Anyone supporting you doing this, needs to give their head a wobble!

Personally I’d be relaxed about this Op given the area you’re in and the 2 minute limit. TBH I’m taken aback at other posters. I’m in my 50s and what I considered to be a normal upbringing in the 70s and 80s would now be a matter for referral to SS. My own kids (now 18,21) have survived, well adjusted, despite judgements that would have pearl clutchers spluttering.

I've had a starter motor catch fire and fill the car with smoke, while it was turned off.

And I've had a locked car stolen.

There's two reasons why.

@EveryKneeShallBowi came on here to say exactly the same thing. Saw a car beginning to smoke whilst on the school run. Thankfully they had their baby with them (not in the car) at the time but my god, it could have been so much worse. It was on fire within a few minutes.

is it a matter of walking 10 feet from the car to grab your child?

No. Get a ring sling. Leave it permanently adjusted for you. Slip over shoulder. Release baby from car seat. Plonk baby in. Baby will soon be back to sleep, your hands are / remain free. You can have conversations with your child/baby/both at same time. More sociable for baby than pram/pushchair. Easy to return baby to car seat in car.

I've done this loads of times, and - gasp - I've let my toddler watch something on my phone while I did it. I'm sure you know to assess the risks in the moment.

If I could see the car and DC and they could see me then maybe, eg if you are parked in a car park that the school door opens out to. Otherwise no. There may be an issue meaning DC are let out a few minutes late, or the teacher may ask to have a chat. I wouldn't leave them if parked on the road side as around here the road is chaotic at leaving time and there is a chance car could be bumped into with DC inside.

Agree with this I live in a rural area but would have to park on the road and would worry about my car being bumped.

But this seems like one of those threads where OP is going to do it anyway?

And in the meantime how many babies and toddlers have been mown down and killed whilst on the pavement with their parent. Life is full of risks, and the risk of being hit by a car whilst with your toddler moving between the car and school is real too.

I wouldn’t do this. Lots of (albeit unlikely) scenarios that can happen. You’d never forgive yourself if it did.

I can’t believe it takes so little time to collect a child that you could have eyes on your car all the time. IME there’s an awful lot of faffing and distraction at pick up time!

I personally wouldn’t do it because I’m a worry wart.

However, some parents do at our (small) primary school and I’ve never thought much of it. They park very close and the car is never out of their eyesight. They don’t go into school, the child come to them at the gate.

I do remember the school run being the absolute ball ache of the century so you have my sympathies there.

You wouldn’t be judged on that the driver of the car would. If you left your child in a car and something happened you would be judged
I also know someone whose car set on fire very quickly if anyone had been left in it they would have been badly injured or died.

She’d also need to actually factor time to physically get back to the car itself.

Far too common that the other child is delayed, needs help with something, teacher starts a chat. Not worth it.

No way.

If child is asleep and wakes they will scream their head off.
If awake, surely they won’t be happy to see you walk off and also scream their head off.
Pick up might usually be quick but what if the teacher wants a word- you either have to leg it back to the car or leave the toddler for 5/10 minutes, potentially screaming.
Toddlers have sometimes managed to get themselves out of the car seat and either get out of the car, injure themselves or let the hand break off.
Plus just why wouldn’t you pop them into a buggy (with rain cover if necessary) and take them with you? It’s really not a massive hassle in parenting terms. If it means cutting a nap short, surely that’s a good thing by 3.15?

I guess it’s not much different to leaving your child in the car whilst you go get fuel and pay for it.

I personally wouldn’t do either but it really is the parents call.

I wouldn't personally. They can get out of their car seat and work out how to let the handbrake off from a surprisingly young age.

The next time could be one too many…don’t risk it!

If someone was driving by and smashed their car into your parked car you wouldn’t know if toddler was injured until it may be too late: the other driver would assume the car was empty.

I do but pick up is less than 2 mins and I can see the car. If somebody has asked to see me I go back and grab DD. Nursery nurse brings older DD to the door for me so I can see when she’s there waiting

How on earth are your school so organised that pick up only takes 2 mins, and that is guaranteed? My youngest is at a small village school, they finish at 3.15. I get to the playground at 3.10 because sometimes they come out a bit early. Today they came out at 3.18, and then as he was near the back of the line it was 3.21 before he actually got to the front. Then he’d forgotten his wellies from Forest School so had to go back in and fetch them. We got to the car at 3.25, so 15 mins in total.

No, I definitely would not do this for many reasons...some of which are:

• Will take seconds for someone to break into your car and take your todder. Someone who means them harm.
• They could have a medical emergency (e.g. choke on something they got hold of)
• A freak accident/someone losing control of their car for some reason may mean that they crash into your car. Even just clipping your wing mirror will be loud and really startle and frighten your todder.
• What if something happens to YOU and no one realises for ages your toddler has been left in your car.

Yes all of these things are unlikely, very unlikely but...they do happen. Not a chance I would take with my toddler.

Gosh - happens all the time around here. I regularly drive past the nursery at pick-up and there are kids left in the car while older/younger siblings are collected.

I wouldn't give it a second thought, OP.