Dog has me at my wits end.

[Badhuman]

Our dog has been to vets, behavioural trainer and we have followed lots of other advice. She gets 2 big walks a day. Morning 2 miles and early evening 1.5 miles. She is a Cavapoo and 8 years old.

I’m at my wits end. She is a quite a nice dog but the destruction and attention seeking is killing me and I absolutely resent her now. I can’t have anyone in the house during the day without her barking forever. I can’t leave her without her barking forever. She has to be with me the whole time. We’ve tried anxiety medicine - no difference in behaviour. Behaviour has always been not great.

My kids adore her. What the hell do I do. WIBU to rehome her.

Then it’s someone else’s problem … typical. People like this should not have dogs!!!!

Disgusting comment. Hope you don’t have pets … or kids for that matter!!

After 8 years?!? 🤣🤣

Are you just doing walks? It’s probably not enough. My dog does around 7-10 hours a week at a scent training ‘club’, hydro/fun swimming 1-2 times a month, daily walks (albeit she will sometimes refuse a rainy walk as it’s not her main source of stimulation anyway), daily training for 10-15 mins, 10-15 mins of daily physio exercises.

In between that she mostly just wants down time on her own or snoozy cuddles.

She’s a dachshund, so technically a working breed, but we do a lot to tire her brain out.

People should not breed dogs like this.

If people didn’t buy these dogs there would be no market to breed them for … irresponsible people, I WANT as dog so I shall have one regardless as to whether I am capable of looking after it properly!

Hats off to you being able to retrain a dog. Thats not easy and your dog is extremely lucky. I dont get the feeling the OP was looking at putting in the hard yards and dedication needed to achieve similar.

I have two cavapoo littermates. I asked chatGPT for help in a low moment. It has changed my life (and theirs) and my house is so much calmer. I was at my wits end and couldn’t cope much longer - I’ve used two real life trainers previously, one was excellent but ChatGPT was like having that trainer in my house to guide me through every eventuality. They’re not perfect now but a million times better and still improving. My dogs are almost 8. Highly recommend trying it, you won’t regret it.

edit to add: we already used crates at bedtime but now use them more during the day too for them to settle in. You’ll be surprised how quickly they learn to switch off with the right leadership from you. It was stressful but totally worth it!

What a good idea. Of course some will say you need experience but chat gpt will be able to access millions of sources for advice.

Millions of totally random and unregulated sources 😬

Not an avid watcher but he has never asked (for me) two critical questions. Is the dog neutered and does it get enough exercise.

He’s also not an accredited behaviourist and has no recognised qualifications.

A bit like mumsnet

Sorry OP- not intending to have a go at all, but 3.5 miles total isn’t very long. Do you have enough time in the day to up the mileage? Or funds to book a dog walker?

Not surprised to hear that, thanks.

I have a Cavapoo and she is nothing like this. Most well natured dog, quite happy on her own, rarely barks and has never destructed a thing, maybe I’m just lucky

I don't blame her. Long time dog owner here who made huge numbers of mistakes when we got our much loved Lab X who got lots of training and lots of walks and was not perfect.
Unless I've missed it, OP doesn't say if she's at home all day with endless time to deal with the dog or whether she's trying to work at home. If she's trying to work, then no way can she spend 3-4 hours at least walking, playing with, training the dog and it would be better off in daycare, which is monumentally expensive. Maybe agility training might help if it's gently done but it's yet more time we have no idea that OP has.
On holiday in Cornwall I noticed nearly every dog (and there were loads) was a poodle cross. As a child, the only poodle I ever knew belonged to someone who had to have it put down as it bit people. It was a very highly strung, snappy little dog and yet here we are, breeding those genes into nearly every crossbreed dog.

Entirely your fault OP. You’ve got a dog without thoroughly researching the breed or investing in proper training. Now you want to dump it off somewhere like a piece of rubbish. Hope your kids do the same to you when you get old.

I used to do what I called a 'sniffy walk' for my German shepherd, it knackered her out much more than a long walk. I used chopped up raw carrots into little pieces, took her to our back garden which is actually a field across the road, sprinkled the bits all over the grass. She spent hours sniffing them out. She'd be tired out and calm for hours after.

One thing I know is that dogs had a lot less behavioural issues before everyone started using gentle parenting techniques meant for children on their dogs. They work on neither. Have you ever seen a Dog Mum with her litter? She doesn’t offer “distraction” or “gentle correction” to her unruly pups, she growls & nips & moves them about in a rough but controlled manner ensuring they know what’s expected. 8 years old? More of the same “training” will not work. You’re stuck with it now. Many Cockapoos are a fucking nightmare quite frankly. My heart sinks a bit every time a friend or acquaintance proudly announces the acquisition of a cocker/cava/poo/chon/Schnoodle/yorkiepoo… 🙄

Rehome???? Pass the problem on to someone else?

You realise humans aren’t dogs, right? And that dogs know we aren’t other dogs?

Do you greet your dog by sniffing its arse?

Im sorry this isnt what you want to hear op but these posts always make me so glad I haven’t got a dog! And yet so many people try to convince me…

I hope you get some decent advice.

I think you've had some good advice here but I have to say that 2 miles and 1.5miles are not long walks and clearly not adequate. This goes double if these are on lead walks. I have a large golden retriever and she gets two good walks a day - a good walk is an hour off lead and ball chasing. Then a 15min lunchtime walk on lead. She is unbearable if she doesn't get this exercise, and angelic if she does. It might be the difference for you.

Have to say I have a cavachon and she’s the most well behaved dog I’ve ever come across. To the extent strangers compliment me on her when out walking. I can walk her off the lead for miles, to heel if needed. Perfect recall. Non destructive, no separation anxiety. Does as she’s told in the house. I can literally say “go upstairs “ and she goes upstairs. They’re not all bad