Ski trip cost- are we subsidizing “host “ family

[Moknicker]

Wanted to get a sense check on how a family has asked us to split costs for an upcoming ski trip

• One family (2 adults + 2 kids) is going on the trip.
• Four additional children (each from separate families) were invited to join. Our child is one of these - is friends with younger child. Kids are 17 and 15 year olds
• Total people on the trip: 8
• 4 from the host family.
• 4 individual children

Shared costs:

• Accommodation: 4k total
• Ski lift pass: 7 at 300 each = 2100 ( mum is not skiing)
• Total cost: 6100

The host family just told us the cost is 1640 for our son. I asked for the breakdown( we were only given total figure). It looks like they have added up the costs and divided by 5

Aibu to say this is not fair and our cost is around 1050( accommodation divided by 8 and we pay 300 for ski lift ) and we and the other kids should not be subsidizing the “host” family? And if we are then they should have told us beforehand?

Travel costs and other costs are covered individually.

We have a ski trip planned and I have said my son can bring 2 friends, and his cousin. We have booked and paid for the accommodation. The 3 additional teens are our guests and I haven’t asked parents to contribute to that. At the point of invitation I said that we would like parents to cover flights, ski pass and ski hire. They would also need money for food on the mountain and Apres. Breakfast and Dinners at the chalet would be covered by us, as would the 3 dinners we have planned to eat out. Parents of all 3 guests immediately offered to contribute to meals and chalet food. I just think the hosts should have been crystal clear at the point of invitation so you could have accepted or declined accordingly. So unless a breakdown of the bill is forthcoming, and they are all things you are happy to pay for you probably need to pull your son off the trip.

Exactly how we deal with it.

It’s not rude it’s factual and discussions around money are facts & figures, it’s a simple question and if OP has misunderstood then the host family can simply answer the factual question.

People tip toeing around these kind of discussions with passive aggressive not wanting to offend anyone whishy washy- ness is what causes more confusion & misunderstandings.

I also think it is fair to say 'the boys want to go skiing, and we are happy to take them, but we can't afford to do it unless everyone shares the costs. We have tried to keep costs down so this is the kind of accommodation we are thinking of booking and these are the details of other costs.'

However, it doesn't sound as though this is a trip where somebody has tried to keep costs down.

I think it’s rude and pretty offensive to have sent a message without any context about why I’m being asked for about double what the simple maths works out at but there you go.

Its also immature to jump to pulling out as opposed to getting to the bottom of what’s being asked for, it’s a simple discussion to have.

Yes to be honest I think it’s very generous of people to offer to take other children on holiday, I wouldn’t expect hosts to have to cover out of pocket costs involved in extending the invite, as long as it is clear upfront.

I don’t think it’s a problem in principle that OP has been asked to contribute, it’s the lack of transparency over costs which seem rather high that’s the issue.

Oh wow, ok so I take back what I said about £1,600 being about right. I thought that was for a week and maximum 2 to a room.

How are they renting a 7 seater when there will be 8 of them??

Surely they'll have had a budget in mind, able to afford a trip doesnt mean able to pay more than that if each non-family child pays £1640 thats £6560 when the whole trip is £6100.

Its not like a dinner where one person got desert, its a massive difference. I dont think being asked for what amounts to double an equal share its not unreasonable to ask about the discrepancy.

And tbh if they arent friendly enough to answer with grace I wouldnt want my child go on future trips with them

We’ve taken extra kids on all our summer holidays since our kids became teenagers but I draw the line at ski holidays. They are just too complicated and expensive. Not to mention the not insignificant risk of someone breaking a limb!

Is it too late to back out, OP?

I agree. I have come across people like this myself in the past. Just say no.

Yes!

That's what I thought too - and I think it probably is about right in those circumstances, with food, hire etc.

I hope this is the answer because I had a “haha eureka!” moment when I realised that the maths on this worked out 😄

It would make sense of the otherwise rather arbitrary £40

The OP mentioned the cost

Really? I thought they typically have a 2/3/2 or 2/2/3 layout?

hang on you edited your post so my reply doesn’t make sense…!

I know OP mentioned the cost but how does OP know the cost? If the hosts shared the cost of the accommodation and the cost of the lift pass then it’s quite the Derren Brown mind trickery move to claim that their share of the cost is more than double what it should be!

7 seater means 7+ driver :)

It was good thinking - and I suspect you are right.

I'm wondering if the "mathsy" parent said "it's x amount for the friends of dc" and the other parent is the one who conveyed the message onwards, thinking it was that amount each.

I think its normally 2,3, 3.

But not a lot of room for luggage.

Maybe the 7 seater that fits 8 was really expensive.

😂

Did you end up geting a breakdown?

No it means 7 passengers including the driver.

I wonder what happens to the last person! Roof rack!

Want to know more about this- sadly no update.

does seem spendy!

They ski hanging onto a rope tied to the back of the 7 seater.
Obviously there’s an extra charge for this.