Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I feel terrible, taken out of school for Lapland UK

305 replies

MummaHud · 02/12/2025 07:15

I’ve taken my daughter out of school today she’s 5 for Lapland UK. We don’t have a lot of money and her brother was born extremely premature last year and she missed out on a lot of things because of it.

she’s the kindest soul, she’s really clever and she’s just amazing.

im not justifying anything as id never take my child out of school, but we won VIP at Lapland UK.

an experience I’d never ever consider looking at usually and its not an experience I can turn down.

my daughter has 100% attendance, I’m worried what the school will do? I’ve been honest and she will be back tomorrow.

am I a bad mum? 😭

OP posts:
gdlyig · 02/12/2025 07:45

Have a brilliant time!

Just enjoy it. One day is nothing, particularly at that age (I am strict with DC re attendance).

You have nothing to worry about as you told the truth, so your daughter doesn't have to hide the experience.

Strictlycomeparent · 02/12/2025 07:46

Noone who has ever taught in a primary school seriously thinks that the odd day, even a week out of school age 5 is going to make a big difference for children from loving homes. The current attendance policy is highly novel, not how other modern countries operate and not how we operated as a country until very recently. It’s a mistaken blip and eventually a government will loosen the grip on attendance. It’s unfortunate for those bringing up children now, but don’t worry too much about it if your child is normally, regularly in school.

tsmainsqueeze · 02/12/2025 07:48

I wouldn't think twice !
Enjoy your lovely day, no one could possibly think it's the wrong thing to do.

Allswellthatendswelll · 02/12/2025 07:49

Omg do not worry and her teacher will be nothing but pleased for her! Teachers only mind when it's the kid with 80% attendance. All the attendance pressure is external on schools.

If it makes you feel any better I'm taking 4 year old DS out for a week so we can save a grand on centre parcs (and I'm a teacher but it's my last month of mat leave).

Allschoolsareartschools · 02/12/2025 07:49

No, you're a fab mum, have an amazing time!

Whatsthatsheila · 02/12/2025 07:50

Stop with the guilt. I don’t think the teachers will care one bit that she’s missed a day. I think they’ll be excited for her having such an awesome experience.

why don’t you take in a tub of heroes or something tomorrow to say thank you for understanding how important this was to you as a family after last year?

might help you feel a little better by showing the staff that to you appreciate them

LadyGAgain · 02/12/2025 07:50

This sort of fear is a clear demonstration of how ridiculous the schools and rules system has gotten. Have an amazing time. It’s one day.

PrioritisePleasure24 · 02/12/2025 07:51

You are not a bad mum. She’s five and the magic will be amazing for her. Don’t worry it’s one day of school. How lucky to have won such a prize after the time you have had.

You won’t get this time back.

StillAGoth · 02/12/2025 07:51

OP, I'm a primary teacher (for what that's worth) and agree that the school won't do anything.

It'll be recorded as an unauthorised absence because it has to be but the staff will think it's a lovely idea and most would do the same ourselves.

Seriously, do not worry about this and have a lovely day.

Just lie. Why be honest?

Because the first thing the child will do is tell everyone when she returns so it's pointless and doesn't reflect well on lying parents. Schools have no choice but to record absences as unauthorised but teachers are people too and most of us would absolutely do the same thing for our own children.

StillAGoth · 02/12/2025 07:53

LadyGAgain · 02/12/2025 07:50

This sort of fear is a clear demonstration of how ridiculous the schools and rules system has gotten. Have an amazing time. It’s one day.

Totally agree. Parents should be able to do things like this.

MyDeftDuck · 02/12/2025 07:53

Go! And have a wonderful day with your children! But do tell the truth about going to Lapland UK because your DD will go back to school…….and tell EVERYONE how magical the place was! Don’t get caught out in a lie OP.

Ellie1015 · 02/12/2025 07:53

Sounds like a lovely experience you cant do another time. She is 5 and has good attendance so fine to miss a day as a one off. Enjoy!

TootsMaHoots · 02/12/2025 07:53

LadyGAgain · 02/12/2025 07:50

This sort of fear is a clear demonstration of how ridiculous the schools and rules system has gotten. Have an amazing time. It’s one day.

I agree. I do some supply teaching and last week I was in a year one class and there was a little boy who was so ill he absolutely should not have been there but the school had rung the day before and encouraged his mother to bring him in. He ended up asleep so he didn’t learn a thing but as long as the school have their attendance mark that’s all they are interested in.

Nonameagain31 · 02/12/2025 07:56

MummaHud · 02/12/2025 07:15

I’ve taken my daughter out of school today she’s 5 for Lapland UK. We don’t have a lot of money and her brother was born extremely premature last year and she missed out on a lot of things because of it.

she’s the kindest soul, she’s really clever and she’s just amazing.

im not justifying anything as id never take my child out of school, but we won VIP at Lapland UK.

an experience I’d never ever consider looking at usually and its not an experience I can turn down.

my daughter has 100% attendance, I’m worried what the school will do? I’ve been honest and she will be back tomorrow.

am I a bad mum? 😭

I took my kids to Lapland aged 5 and 7 - they missed two days of school along with their close friends as we all went together. My kids are now 11 and 14 and say its the best holiday they've ever been on... It have amazing memories and loved it too!

The teachers were really interested in our trip tbh.

I hope you have the best time.

Happyhettie · 02/12/2025 07:56

I’m a teacher and have been for many moons.
Please don’t worry. Things like this are brilliant. Some of my class have gone this year on school days and the photos the parents have shown me you can see the awe and wonder - it’s lovely. And the excitement from the children has been just gorgeous.

Your child will remember your adventure together. So many people will tell you that life is too short to not grab opportunities like this. Have an amazing day and enjoy every moment.

Edited to add: please don’t lie about it. We’re not stupid and the kids ALWAYS come in and tell us. All that happens if you tell a child to lie is that you put them in an awkward position when we ask if they’re feeling better!

PrioritisePleasure24 · 02/12/2025 07:57

Yeah don’t lie, kids aren’t quiet about what goes on generally. Plenty tell everyone about their holiday when they were marked off sick etc. Ot the other side is they worry about trying to keep it secret so their parents don’t get into trouble.

Teachers are human, the attendance policy wasn’t set by the teachers but by goverment depts and local authority. They would totally understand you doing this.

Bunnycat101 · 02/12/2025 07:59

1-2 days really isn’t an issue- don’t worry and have a lovely day.

landlordhell · 02/12/2025 08:00

PrioritisePleasure24 · 02/12/2025 07:57

Yeah don’t lie, kids aren’t quiet about what goes on generally. Plenty tell everyone about their holiday when they were marked off sick etc. Ot the other side is they worry about trying to keep it secret so their parents don’t get into trouble.

Teachers are human, the attendance policy wasn’t set by the teachers but by goverment depts and local authority. They would totally understand you doing this.

This. They keep it up for an hour then tell everyone where they went. It’s quite funny.

itsgettingweird · 02/12/2025 08:01

Ohhh congratulations - I hope you have the best time and your littlest is doing well now?

Enjoy!

Mamabear487 · 02/12/2025 08:01

Absolutely not a bad mum. It’s one day and she’s 5 memories and experiences like that will be with you forever and they are only small once. I’m taking my kids abroad for 2 days on Thursday to the Christmas markets and just emailed the school and told them they wouldn’t be in. All they are doing at school this week is crafts and present day anyway!!

Thechaseison71 · 02/12/2025 08:01

Hope you have an amazing day!!!. Don't suppose you have a spare ticket for me lol?

Dontlletmedownbruce · 02/12/2025 08:03

Hell no, you are doing something wonderful for her. I'm taking 3 kids out of school for a ski holiday for a whole week (not in UK so less strict) I don't care, they can catch up. Life experiences and travel are more educational at the end of the day

Whatsthatsheila · 02/12/2025 08:04

Happyhettie · 02/12/2025 07:56

I’m a teacher and have been for many moons.
Please don’t worry. Things like this are brilliant. Some of my class have gone this year on school days and the photos the parents have shown me you can see the awe and wonder - it’s lovely. And the excitement from the children has been just gorgeous.

Your child will remember your adventure together. So many people will tell you that life is too short to not grab opportunities like this. Have an amazing day and enjoy every moment.

Edited to add: please don’t lie about it. We’re not stupid and the kids ALWAYS come in and tell us. All that happens if you tell a child to lie is that you put them in an awkward position when we ask if they’re feeling better!

Edited

This also @MummaHud take lots of pictures and maybe encourage your daughter to write a couple of short sentences about her day.

the teachers would love it!

Timesquaredy · 02/12/2025 08:05

am I a bad mum?

Absolutely not. Sounds lovely.

As a teacher, I can assure you that one day off, especially at this time of year, is not going to do any harm.

AgeingLabMum · 02/12/2025 08:06

Have a wonderful day. You will probably get a letter from school but this is just a template that they are told to send. Enjoy every moment ❤️