My cleaner wants to bring her baby to my house…

[That80show]

Evening all,

My cleaner (she has only been once before) has a 8 month old baby and has called today to say that her child minder is no longer available to look after him so could she bring him on Friday when she cleans my house. She said that he won’t be of any bother as he will just sleep…

As a mum of a baby of a similar age I know just how demanding looking after a baby can be and highly doubt he will sleep for the 3 hours that she is at my house.
i know she has a husband but maybe he is working that day so is unable to look after their son.
On the one hand I feel bad because I know how difficult it can be to juggle motherhood and work so I was tempted to say well bring him just this once but that I won’t accept it on a regular basis.
On the other hand I can’t see her being able to focus on cleaning my house properly which I really need as I too have a young family and busy with work.

Am I being totally unreasonable in saying no I’m sorry this isn’t going to work?

I don’t think it will work. I didn’t find I could do much (any?) cleaning with my two around as babies. I don’t think it’s a bring your baby type job.

I feel really bad typing that though. She must be quite desperate if she wants to even try this.

I see a lot of posters saying let her try. It does depend what her baby is like, but then again we all know babies change quickly and he might soon stop being a “just sleeps” sort of baby.

The only thing I’d be worried about is safety but beyond that I’d say yes.

I would say just this once, but you expect the job to be done, even if it takes longer. In the future she needs to make other arrangements.

Is your house childproofed? If not, how's the liability there is the baby gets into something they shouldn't?

This is an 8 month old whose mom won't be able to do her job while supervising the baby. She's going to be gloved and working with chemicals and she possibly won't be able to respond instantaneously. Are you supposed to be watching? I also think if you allow it once or twice, it will become a regular thing.

I'd tell her to contact me when she's got childcare.

Fire her and hire a cleaner without young dependents.

I would say just once but I think she probably wants to do this on a permanent basis and when the baby gets a bit older it will not be sleeping for so long. When my children were young, I did have a cleaner who brought her child in the holidays but the child was a bit older than mine and they played well together. I also once had a carpet fitted just before Christmas and the carpet fitter asked if his son could come in with him while he worked. The boy was very well behaved.

On a really practical level, where is she going to put the baby? In a car seat? Pushchair? Playpen? An 8 month old is crawling and probably starting to pull up. They are a nightmare at that age and hard to contain.

I wonder why the husband can't take his child into work?

As much as I sympathise with her situation, it would be a no from me. She's only been once, so it's not a long standing arrangement where she's struggling and has earned a bit of good will. I would cut my losses and hire someone else.

My usual cleaner was busy so my cleaners sent someone who works for her who turned up last week with a baby (probs about a year old) strapped in a sling on her back. She was there four hours and the baby didn't make a sound!!! She did ask me if she could stop for 10mins to give baby some lunch and I said sure.

It was no bother - and cleaner did an incredible job cleaning - much better than some other stand ins we've had.

Personally I would only care if the work suffers, if she has a good baby and does a good job I wouldn't care

Maybe you could get her flogged too for the temerity of even asking...

The cleaner has only appeared for the duty once. She has not yet earned the right to call in any favors.

OP needs to nip this crap in the bud right now!

I think you are more concerned about the situation in hand that mirrors your own as your comments have echoed, you state you know how difficult it is to juggle a child that age and work, the cleaner is obviously trying to do that as well as yourself with a young child and work.

I think some self doubt about your entire situation is occurring here and underlying possible frustration that you are not in your own home with your child with time to clean your own home which is understandable whilst working and also being a mother of a your young child.

I would suggest to saying yes to the arrangement on this occasion and state that you hope that she can arrange a new childminder for the next cleaning appointment.

Absolutely not. She needs to cancel until she can get some childcare.

My mum was a carer and she'd bring me and my baby brother along when she went to houses. It never prevented her from finishing all her duties. We just sat in a corner with our toys. The choice is entirely yours to make, OP, but I would personally allow it this once and see how it goes.

It’s hard to find a decent cleaner around here, and I’d give the benefit of the doubt in this scenario if I’d been happy with her work so far.

If I had a baby anyway I wouldn’t think anything of letting hers play with my baby’s toys / playpen / Jumperoo. She’s let you know in advance and it’s a 1 time thing. Sometimes a bit of flexibility goes a long way.

I think this is actually fairly common. I know loads of people whose cleaners bring the baby with them.

Nah, she’s not your cleaner. She’s been once and now this. I doubt there ever was a childminder, or that she’d bother getting other childcare when she thinks this is okay to ask. It’s not, for myriad clear reasons. Don’t do it. Yanbu.

My cleaner (she has only been once before) has a 8 month old baby and has called today to say that her child minder is no longer available to look after him so could she bring him on Friday when she cleans my house.

The timing seems somewhat coincidental. Did she ever have a childminder or did she get someone to look after him just for one week and this was always her plan?

If she'd been coming for some time and then found herself without childcare you'd maybe try to make it work. But after only one visit?

This is utter lunacy.
As much as we all feel for this woman, and want to be flexible and understanding etc - it’s simply inconceivable to have a baby present while one is doing a professional cleaning job. It is dangerous. This isnt like cleaning around our kids in our houses, this is supposed to be a professional cleaning job. I am really sorry for the cleaner, but I just couldn’t say yes to that, it puts the child at great risk (or, very little cleaning will get done).

Also, do you pets? I had a cleaner who I let bring her kids one time during school holidays. My DH was extremely pissed off with me about it. The kids weren’t the problem, it was because we’ve three big dogs and, as much as they’ve never shown any aggression to anyone, you just never know, and it’s absolutely not worth it

Absolutely not, 8 month olds do not sleep all day and are likely crawling! I would say it isn't safe trying to clean around a crawling baby, ok when your own home but not if it's your job.

It would be a no from me, but I’d be flexible and ask if there was a better day for her. School age children in the holidays I’d be fine with, providing they behaved and the standard of clean didn’t drop, but 8mo babies need attention, and are very unlikely to sleep for 3 hours in an unfamiliar environment.

You need to be clearer - is this a one-off? Then yes of course you should let her.

Permanently, no.

Don’t even think about it! Of course not.

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