Page 3 | To be absolutely mortified? Please share your most embarrassing stories to make me feel better

CryBecauseItsOver · 2025-11-30T20:40:32+00:00

Oh Lordy lord I need some comfort embarrassment to make me feel better about an actual situation that happened to me this afternoon. NC for obvious reasons. I had birth repair surgery on my vag last year. Long story short all is fine I just had a very small area that became a bit red and sore this week. One of my closest and trusted friends is a gynaecologist so I went to her for advice. She told me to take a photo and send it to her. I trust this woman with my life. This isn't the issue. so there's me, half naked, hair a rats nest, legs akimbo in front of my floor length mirror. I actually took a short video. I sent the photo and video to her and left it as that. this afternoon my daughter was scrolling my tiktok to choose a hair style she'd like for school tomorrow. I supervise her on this completely as she's only 5. I turn away for a literal split second and I see my video, whole fucking fanny including my fire button on show, with 95% loaded on it. I grabbed the phone and shouted NOOOO and safe to say my heart fell out my arse. now the thing is with TikTok you cannot delete videos until they've been uploaded. You can't cancel a partial upload. So I had to sit there, on the verge of an SVT episode, waiting for this fucking video to load. it loaded. I deleted it within a millisecond. It said it had zero views. thank the lord above no one could see it. Lessen learned but I still cannot get rid of this utter horror despite me deleting it in time with no views. My nervous system can't quite grasp that it's in fact, okay.. I've had no messages about it. Thank god my vag is at least lasered but Jesus bloomin Christ it was a close call. I would have probably moved to some remote Spanish island never to be seen again. the video was uploaded for genuinely less than a second. No longer than that. PLEASE tell me your embarrassing stories to make me feel better! I am utterly mortified! I'm laughing about it now but jeeez it was a very awful angle and my vag looked like what I can only describe as a butterflied chicken. At least it was lasered I guess. 😩

Itsseweasy · 01/12/2025 11:43

EasilyRemedied · 01/12/2025 11:14

@CryBecauseItsOver good work getting it deleted before anyone saw it.
I wish I could delete this mortifying memory from my brain…
I was at a music festival many years ago. There was a long row of portaloos, massive queues for each one. When I finally got in there, finished and stood, was just about to bend and pull up my trousers, when the door swung open in the wind because I clearly had not locked it properly. The massed queuers all got a view of me standing with trousers and pants around my ankles before I managed to grab the door. Awful, awful moment.

Oh my God you’ve just unlocked a memory I must have blanked out from my mind 😆

I had forgotten to bring a wee specimen with me to my appointment and so was given the usual little pot to fill up in the customer toilet.
Sadly I completely neglected to lock the door, so not only did someone unknowingly come in to join me, they opened the door wide enough that I could see everyone in the waiting room gawping at me hovering above the toilet seat, mid-flow, trying to catch wee in the tiny pot 😩
Thank goodness I moved far away not long after that!

Hoppinggreen · 01/12/2025 11:56

ChardonnaysBeastlyCat · 30/11/2025 21:04

I once used the wrong fork in a restaurant.

Does that count?

You disgust me

JaneJeffer · 01/12/2025 12:08

.

lissie123 · 01/12/2025 12:22

On a train to Birmingham for a business meeting. Go to the loo for a wee and forgot to lock the goddam door properly- you know where to have to press the button to lock it. And you guest it mid wee and a man opens the door to find me peeing. I shriek in surprise he looks shocked
apologises and quickly shuts the door again. I really struggle to wee on train now and hate the door locking mechanisms.

Yourlifeinyourhands · 01/12/2025 12:23

IntelCoreStrength · 01/12/2025 07:27

When lockdown first started, we set up our WFH desks in our bedroom, which made the room really crammed. One day, I'd just had a shower and needed to get dressed to do school pick up. The problem was, I could hear DH was on a work call, and our wardrobe on the far side of the bedroom. The only way to get to it was to climb over the bed, which was right behind DH's desk. Zoom was pretty new then, so when I peered into the room and saw a presentation on his screen, I thought it meant he was on a call only. I proceeded to CRAWL ACROSS THE BED IN MY DRESSING GOWN right behind him, only for him to break off talking and smoothly say 'Please excuse my wife crawling across the bed behind me' and then continue on with the meeting without missing a beat. Yes, he had his camera on and I was broadcast to 12 of his work colleagues! The worst part was that once I got my clothes, the only way I could get back out of the room was to...you've guessed it...crawl back the other way.

Haha I did this but crawled across the floor and my DH’s colleagues said ‘is that the dog?’ To which he obviously ‘no it’s my wife’.. at which point I was like erm do I pop my head up and say hello or just stay on the floor?! Pretty sure I just stayed there and slipped away quietly!

BluntAzureDreamer · 01/12/2025 12:27

I was going to a work conference at a really fancy London hotel, with lots of bellboys etc outside. I was trying to look like I belonged and was used to staying in these kinds of places, all nonchalant, you know.... Anyway, 2 porters in fancy top hats and suits offered to help with my 2 carry bags and wheely case but I declined (in truth because I was worried about not knowing what to do ref tipping!), with an 'I'm a strong independent woman' air... Then I promptly tripped up the steps, and my bags and their contents went flying everywhere 😭😭😭 3 porters rushed to help me up and had to gather my stuff for me. I was absolutely mortified 🤦🏻‍♀️

LiveLuvLaugh · 01/12/2025 12:32

@CryBecauseItsOversorry to be dense (awaiting Autism assessment, screened high) I didn’t know it was a thing to do laser hair removal on your vulva. I thought you meant the lasering was part of the repair to your vagina after the injury from the birth and I was interested in that. But it’s also interesting that you would have felt more embarrassment/shame if you had natural pubic hair.

BluntAzureDreamer · 01/12/2025 12:33

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 01/12/2025 10:52

Did a big shop in Asda a few years ago, and I mean trolley full to the brim, card got declined at the tills and I was escorted by a store worker to customer services, him pushing my trolley.

I had been involved in a scam and they had taken £200 out of my bank which I was unaware of. To this day I check my bank before I enter a shop, even for a pint of milk and loaf of bread, I think it scarred me

I spent many years working at Tesco on the checkouts and this happened so often it was boring. Occasionally you got to put the customer's shopping back on the shelf so escaped the checkout for a bit, and had a lovely wander round the store chatting to the boys who were on shelf stacking duty 😉 So don't be embarrassed 😚

EasilyRemedied · 01/12/2025 12:50

Itsseweasy · 01/12/2025 11:43

Oh my God you’ve just unlocked a memory I must have blanked out from my mind 😆

I had forgotten to bring a wee specimen with me to my appointment and so was given the usual little pot to fill up in the customer toilet.
Sadly I completely neglected to lock the door, so not only did someone unknowingly come in to join me, they opened the door wide enough that I could see everyone in the waiting room gawping at me hovering above the toilet seat, mid-flow, trying to catch wee in the tiny pot 😩
Thank goodness I moved far away not long after that!

Edited

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I’m so sorry! Lock it back away and never think of it again!!’ 😫

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 01/12/2025 12:59

BluntAzureDreamer · 01/12/2025 12:33

I spent many years working at Tesco on the checkouts and this happened so often it was boring. Occasionally you got to put the customer's shopping back on the shelf so escaped the checkout for a bit, and had a lovely wander round the store chatting to the boys who were on shelf stacking duty 😉 So don't be embarrassed 😚

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It was more that I was on the till furthest from the entrance and I was escorted with a member of staff pushing the trolley 😂

Original poster

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:07

@SpunkySquidi know your comment has been deleted. But the fact you can even compare a child's vulva, to a grown adults is unbelievably disturbing. It always creeps me out when adults ask or shame women who prefer to be hairless, with looking like a child.

I am a fully grown, 31 year old adult woman. I have a fully developed vulva. As an adult I have higher estrogen levels than a child, thus making changes to the appearance of a vulva as an adult enters into womanhood. Factors like pubes, labia minora and majora, and a clitoral hood grow and appear after or during puberty.

you cannot compare a child's vulva to a grown woman's vulva based on lack of pubes alone.

the fact you have done that and the fact you're bringing children into this thread when there's no relevance, is deeply disturbing.

OP posts:

Original poster

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:08

StarlightRobot · 01/12/2025 10:43

Having a normal, natural vulva shouldn’t increase embarrassment and a lasered vulva shouldn’t be less embarrassing that an unlasered one. That makes me sad and takes me back a bit to the noughties when my friends and I all felt shamed into painful pubic hair removal. I really hope times have changed as I would hate for my DDs to feel shame about their normal, natural unlasered bodies.

It's not universal, it's my own embarrassment. Not anyone else's.

I have wirey thick and curly ginger pubes thanks to chemotherapy changing their anatomy.
my other hair on my body never changed.

i am not responsible for any 'stepping back' because I choose to not have any pubic hair.

HTH.

OP posts:

Original poster

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:09

StarlightRobot · 01/12/2025 10:45

Just to add- I know this isn’t the point of the thread but I think this type of body shaming really needs to be called out. Even if the OP is only referring to her own body, it impacts how women feel about themselves.

That isn't my problem though. If someone else feels shame because I get rid of my pubes, that's on them.

OP posts:

Original poster

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:10

ObtuseMoose · 01/12/2025 11:13

Hard to believe anybody would tbh!
The words 'fire button' made me slightly queasy as well.

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Would lady pearl suffice any better?

OP posts:

Original poster

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:11

LiveLuvLaugh · 01/12/2025 12:32

@CryBecauseItsOversorry to be dense (awaiting Autism assessment, screened high) I didn’t know it was a thing to do laser hair removal on your vulva. I thought you meant the lasering was part of the repair to your vagina after the injury from the birth and I was interested in that. But it’s also interesting that you would have felt more embarrassment/shame if you had natural pubic hair.

Yes, I had full laser hair removal. I have a home device I can do any touch ups with.

(from a fellow autistic & ADHD'r) :)

OP posts:

StarlightRobot · 01/12/2025 13:17

OP, there is absolutely nothing shameful about having your pubes lasered. Whatever you do with your body is of course completely up to you and no one’s business. I think you may have misunderstood my post as I certainly make no judgement on what you do with your body

drspouse · 01/12/2025 13:25

I was a student at an Oxbridge college which will remain nameless and I'd moved into a staircase of first years I didn't know. After going out to a ball (they are very expensive by the way, but we were providing a cappella singing) I went to my room and took off my dress and, well, everything and needed the loo. In my drunken state I forgot the door wasn't on the latch and guess what, I got locked out. It was 5 am!

I saw another person on the floor had their door ajar and I could hear talking so I put ONLY my head round the door and said "I'm locked out and I'm not wearing very many clothes, could you ask the porter for the key?".
I then ran for the loo again and the kind but probably traumatised first year boy went and got the porter to open my door.

hevs03 · 01/12/2025 13:26

Unexpectedromantic · 01/12/2025 09:17

I was at a once-in-a-lifetime type of interview. Dream job stuff. Stakes were high.

We were briskly 'walking and talking' after the seemingly very successful interview while I was being shown out. I slipped/tripped on the lovely, shiny marble floor while stopping and turning to shake the panel leads hand, and did that uncontrolled flail walk-run forward when momentum and a fall meet. I full-on headbutted him in the groin before taking him down in an accidental tackle in the tackle.

We, at this point during the walk and talk, had come out into the centre of the atrium, and I swear the whole place stopped to goggle at the world-renowned and very esteemed panel lead writhing on the floor, unable to get his breath back from being walloped hard in the gentlemen's area.

The silence of a building full of people coming to a standstill was deafening. I then said 'thank you for the opportunity' (which, in hindsight, made it sound like I was thanking him for letting me take him out like a bowling pin in front of his whole directorate). Flustered, not sure what to do with myself, just turned and promptly left the building. I didn't help him up or get him help; I just left.

(I didn't get the job - in fact, they ghosted me entirely)

Edited

I'm sorry you didn't get the job but that has made me snort, laugh and giggle, I would have been mortified too.

ObtuseMoose · 01/12/2025 13:34

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:10

Would lady pearl suffice any better?

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Nope.

OriginalSkang · 01/12/2025 13:37

How to we feel about "The devil's doorbell"?

Shivvy1 · 01/12/2025 13:47

Unexpectedromantic · 01/12/2025 09:17

I was at a once-in-a-lifetime type of interview. Dream job stuff. Stakes were high.

We were briskly 'walking and talking' after the seemingly very successful interview while I was being shown out. I slipped/tripped on the lovely, shiny marble floor while stopping and turning to shake the panel leads hand, and did that uncontrolled flail walk-run forward when momentum and a fall meet. I full-on headbutted him in the groin before taking him down in an accidental tackle in the tackle.

We, at this point during the walk and talk, had come out into the centre of the atrium, and I swear the whole place stopped to goggle at the world-renowned and very esteemed panel lead writhing on the floor, unable to get his breath back from being walloped hard in the gentlemen's area.

The silence of a building full of people coming to a standstill was deafening. I then said 'thank you for the opportunity' (which, in hindsight, made it sound like I was thanking him for letting me take him out like a bowling pin in front of his whole directorate). Flustered, not sure what to do with myself, just turned and promptly left the building. I didn't help him up or get him help; I just left.

(I didn't get the job - in fact, they ghosted me entirely)

Edited

Omg I have actually tears running down my face 😂😂😂😂

Shivvy1 · 01/12/2025 13:47

GarlicBreadStan · 30/11/2025 20:59

Had really bad stomach pain once when I was walking to Asda with my son who was 1 at the time.

Started sweating THROUGH a really thick jacket, so had to dash to the toilets with my son and splash my face and literally ripped the coat off of my body.

Had this massive urge to vomit. Ran to a toilet cubicle, son in my arms. Plonked him on the floor, and started dry heaving.

Someone who was also in the toilets called for a first aider. I was hunched over on the bathroom floor, trousers around my ankles, in and out of consciousness.

First aider was about to call an ambulance as she thought I had appendicitis.

I suddenly jolted up, sat on the toilet and shat.

Turns out I had really bad constipation. And because the toilet cubicles were really small, my son, the first aider and about 3 other people saw me take one of the biggest shits known to man.

I was fucking mortified.

😂😂😂😂 oh I would have died lol.

Kbroughton · 01/12/2025 13:52

I was moving house years ago and was in the midst of packing. I also had a date so I got ready and put i hat on a cap style one, and went out. I got there slightly late and my date was already at the table in a bar. i went over and stood as I took mk coat and hat off. as I took my hat off a pair of knickers flew out and fell at his feet, which he automatically picked up, looked at them, and handed them back. Mortified. Luckily a large glass of wine later we both saw the funny side.

I also once set my hair on fire on a date with a candle on the table.

GarlicBreadStan · 01/12/2025 13:56

Shivvy1 · 01/12/2025 13:47

😂😂😂😂 oh I would have died lol.

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Felt like I was tbh 😂

HorrorAndHaagenDazs · 01/12/2025 13:59

CryBecauseItsOver · 01/12/2025 13:11

Yes, I had full laser hair removal. I have a home device I can do any touch ups with.

(from a fellow autistic & ADHD'r) :)

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I am going to look into pube lasering - i had no idea it existed!
AS here too - Ive removed them ever since they grew as cannot stand the sensation.

Also, just to add some support - my bestie is a nurse and I've sent her a pic of my bits - had a phenomenal pube once that looked like a black tattoo of a crop circle. Turns out it was a 30cm pube that had grown round and round like a coiled spring. Tweezered it out and had to share the before and after with an equal sporner. If you have super close friends, you can share anything.

As you were 😂