AIBU to push back when shops ask for my details when I just want to pay?

[ISimplyDontBelieveIT]

I popped into The White Company today to buy one small item and use the 20 percent off. I normally order online, but this was a cheap item and I didn’t want to pay delivery.

At the till the assistant asked if I was on their mailing list. I said yes (I am). She then asked for my postcode, which I gave, and then she asked me for my surname. My surname is foreign and long and I couldn't be bothered to spell it. I just wanted to pay for my item and leave. I asked why she needed my surname and she said it was to check if I was on their mailing list. That annoyed me as I had literally just confirmed that I was. Why should I go through this whole nonsense especially for such a tiny purchase?? I felt irritated but I know she was just following protocol so I stayed polite and gave her a short version of my surname. She obviously couldn’t find me and then asked if I wanted her to enter my details again. I said no, I just wanted to pay, which I did.

I left the shop feeling oddly irritated by the whole thing. I know a lot of shops do this and it's not a new thing, but it felt like far too much admin for a quick purchase. Would this have grated on anyone else? What’s the best way to shut this down right at the start?

For future reference "no thank you" and a smile as soon as they ask is all you need to do to bypass this. Even if you're already on the mailing list.

It's usually a tracked statistic for shop assistants to sign people up to things, they get bollocked if they don't ask. Trust me, they don't want to do it either, I worked retail for years and my favourite customers were the ones who just declined immediately (and politely) so I could get on with checking them out! Especially Debenhams who punished you for not talking people into debt with their credit card.

Just swerve it with a smile in future, they'll be grateful and you can get on with your day!

No thank you, I'd just like to pay

Or if they ask for your email address say you don't have one...

What would happen if you just said “no thanks, not interested” at the start and then just pay? Never been in The White Company.

Better than New Look when they try and claim you can’t have a receipt, it has to be emailed. I’m like you, I’ve got a weird first name and can’t be arsed spelling it, repeating it because they can’t believe what I’m saying, asking where it comes from etc etc.

I just say “no thank you” when asked for any details. I’ve never seen it as push back as such, the shop assistant has always just said ok and continued the transaction.

I hate this too, also being asked for my email for a receipt. Also have long, foreign name and can’t be arsed to spell/explain I don’t want to give it. I hate that the onus is on the customer to push back.

I had this recently in Dunelm, I went to the checkout and was asked if I was on their mailing list. I simply said, very politely, that I wasn’t and I did not want to be on it. The conversation ended then and I just paid for my goods. I understand that they are required to ask all customers when they pay and I don’t want to make their job difficult. So I try to be polite and respectful of their job but I have no intention of adding to the mailings I already get!

I do unsubscribe to some mailings if I know I am unlikely to buy from them again.

I once walked out of Curry's because they insisted at the till on me giving them a load of personal information. They lose several hundred pounds' worth of sale there. I took to (thereafter) warning shop asisstants "If you badger me for personal information I WILL walk away and you'll lose my custom."

Bright and breezy - "Oh, NO, thank you very much, though - I just needed this one item quickly, then I have lots to be getting on with today!"

Charming but no-nonsense - especially making out that they're offering to do you a favour and you're politely but firmly declining!

We have it here with loyalty cards, email receipt, mailing list etc if it's a shop I have no interest in their cards etc I just say no thank you, doesn't matter if the reply doesn't fit with their question I find this works and no more is asked.

I hate this too.
Just say no, you’re not on the mailing list (even if you are), no you don’t want to go on it, and no, you don’t give out your data for discounts.

Some shops now also say they don’t ‘do’ paper receipts, only e-mail ones. Tell them you want and are entitled to a paper one. You will not give them your e-mail address (which they want to sell on and make a fortune from, btw).

I refuse to give them my personal details.
If they say they need it for the receipt I just say ‘It’s ok I don’t need a receipt’, they then give me a paper one.

Only time I give details is if I am returning an item and it’s necessary , other times I just politely say I’d prefer a paper receipt

YANBU @ISimplyDontBelieveIT. It's irritating. You can shut it down in two steps.

First just say you're already on their mailing list and / or simply want a paper receipt. If you're not already on their mailing list and they still try to pressure you to give your details, ask them to see a copy of their Privacy Notice there and then. Refer them to their responsibility under GDPR to allow you to opt in to their marketing activities, and ask them to show you where and how they are recording your choices. Then ask them where your data will be held, and who is processing it - here in the UK or abroad? If abroad, ask them how they are safeguarding your data outside of the provisions of the GDPR.

I guarantee you they will not push it further 😊

I feel sorry for the shop staff having to do this, I like real life shop assistants and so I tend to say ‘no thanks I prefer paper receipts’ but without getting shitty with them.

I always say no thanks or I don’t want to give my details when asked and have never had any problems

Personally I love it have a separate email folder for all receipts never have to keep anything

I don’t see the big deal, you’ve signed up to them with your email and name to get their 20% off emails.

It’s not like you’ve walked in off the street and they’re demanding the details, you signed up.

Exactly. It's annoying but they will have been told they have to ask.

You can politely decline without being an arse.

The person serving me is just trying to earn a wage, they don't need me getting all snotty and principled about My Personal Details. I just smile and say no thanks or no, I don't have an email address.

If I heard anyone spouting about rights or gdpr to some poor sap serving them in Dunelm I'd think they were a right plonker tbh.

yeah I have a really long email address I have to spell and I hate being asked. I just say I'd like a paper receipt now.

“No, thank you, I just want a paper receipt”. If they protest you remind them that you must be given a paper receipt on request (or just say you don’t even want one for small non returnable items). I’ve had managers appear trying to tell me they need my email, just calmly so no, I want a paper receipt, they relent and give you one

@VickyEadieofThigh with consumer goods shops like Curry’s they will often need to register the warranty which is different, and obviously sometimes they are delivering the item too, quite different to a pair of socks or whatever from a shop in the mall. I do get giving your details is a pain but if your laptop or whatever breaks they need proof of purchase and people loose receipts, plus manufacturers often extend warranties on condition of your information beyond statutory minimum, ask why before getting cross with the staff

Yes this happened to me. I gave them an old email address. I felt sorry for the shop assistant because there must be people who don’t have/refuse to give an email address. I think their printer wasn’t working so they insisted. So annoying having to spell it out

Yes, I agree @ISimplyDontBelieveIT And it's all very well, posters on here saying we must be very kind and calm with the shop assistant, as it's not their fault, and they are told to say it/told to ask for personal information!

Of course we should be nice and just politely say 'no thank you, I just want to buy the item.' However, I (and many people I know) have experienced - many times - a shop assistant asking for personal information, and then not taking no for answer. Being very forthright and pushy.

I don't CARE if they are told to say it, and 'pushed' by management to get details, they are going to get a short shrift from me if they keep nagging me, and badgering me, for my personal details/email address/home address/mobile phone number/landline number etc etc... I'm Generation X, and don't take any shit, and have a sturdy resting bitch face, and can turn very cold if badgered over and over when I have said 'no' already! As one poster said, they WILL lose my custom.

I know a lady who wanted to buy some 'aids' for her swollen hands (arrthritis,) back in May of this year, and she went into a particular store that sells disability aids, and she picked up 2 small items to enable her to open bottles and jars. The assistant asked her for her name, her address, her email address, her landline number, her mobile phone number, her employer, her marital status, what her disability is ... LOADS of things were asked.

She said 'I only want to buy these 2 small items' (less than a tenner in total,) but the assistant said 'you can get 10% off NOW if you join our 'mailing list.' My friend said, but it's only 90 pence saved, and I'm OK thanks, I don't need to join...' The assistant got really bossy, and nagged and nagged her, and patronised her and went on at her sooooooooo much, that she ended up giving all her details.

She told me that she felt bullied, harangued, and pestered, and was quie upset by it... The company send her emails 4-8 times a week advertising their products, they send 3-4 texts a week, they send leaflets in the mail every couple of weeks, and they ring her once a week or so telling her about the various offers they have. (She doesn't answer them now and has blocked them on her mobile phone...But she can't block them on her landline...) She can't get rid of them now. Even though she blocked their email address, the mail still goes into her spam box! And she can't stop the leaflets coming! (And as I said, the landline calls still come!)

I told her to complain to someone (Trading Standards maybe,) or write to the company's head office about it, but she 'doesn't want to cause a fuss!' She is quite timid, and a little bit vulnerable, and these people played on this to manipulate her.

Holland & Barrett are absolutely awful for this, YANBU.

I love H&B. They are trying to compete with Amazon.

You’ll be crying when Holland and Barrett are casualty on the high street.