AIBU to push back when shops ask for my details when I just want to pay?

[ISimplyDontBelieveIT]

I popped into The White Company today to buy one small item and use the 20 percent off. I normally order online, but this was a cheap item and I didn’t want to pay delivery.

At the till the assistant asked if I was on their mailing list. I said yes (I am). She then asked for my postcode, which I gave, and then she asked me for my surname. My surname is foreign and long and I couldn't be bothered to spell it. I just wanted to pay for my item and leave. I asked why she needed my surname and she said it was to check if I was on their mailing list. That annoyed me as I had literally just confirmed that I was. Why should I go through this whole nonsense especially for such a tiny purchase?? I felt irritated but I know she was just following protocol so I stayed polite and gave her a short version of my surname. She obviously couldn’t find me and then asked if I wanted her to enter my details again. I said no, I just wanted to pay, which I did.

I left the shop feeling oddly irritated by the whole thing. I know a lot of shops do this and it's not a new thing, but it felt like far too much admin for a quick purchase. Would this have grated on anyone else? What’s the best way to shut this down right at the start?

Does anyone remember years ago when shops would refuse to sell you a tv if you didn’t give them your email address? Because they had to notify tv licensing 🤦🏽‍♀️ I remember having rows in Currys and tescos about it

It's just for their marketing emails, it's why they want to email you a receipt.

All of this shite drives me bonkers ! Also this needing an' App 'to pay at the self service registers in order to avoid the unbelievably slow and sometimes nearly comatose sales assistants .I just put the stuff back at this stage and walk out Feck that!

On behalf of sales assistants everywhere can I just say that it pisses us off as much as it pisses you off 🫠🤣

I’m an assistant manager - our store is graded by Head Office based on what percentage of returning customers we have and what percentage of new customers we get to log their details. It simply logs a copy of their transaction on our system so we can trace their receipt easily.

We’re maybe a tad less annoying due to the fact we only send 2 marketing emails per year (if a customer wants them) simply advertising the first day of our sales.

Can I just add that as a sales assistant it’s horrendously annoying when a customer kicks off over being asked for details because they just want a paper receipt - then they come back the following week to return an item without said receipt and expect me to refund it because I “should remember them” 🙄🤣 I then need to go through the faff of getting them to show me the transaction on a bank statement, getting the last 4 digits of their card number then trawling our system to find the transaction and the receipt number before I can then actually do anything for the customer. All the while they’re getting shitty with me again because it’s taking so long and it’s “ridiculous that you can’t just refund!” 🤣

I always say no even if I am on the list if I am in a rush 😂

I get your irritation! LOL

I really dislike it, and it is time consuming beyond belief, but the discount offers and codes are usually produced by the online arm of a business if you are a member and signed up to mailing emails and associated benefits already (and hence suited to online orders more than in-store). Here you said you wanted to use the 20 percent off.
The person at the till will have had to verify the details against online customer information they can view, to have the best chance of getting the temporarily-released 20 percent code to work, and potentially any longer lasting membership discounts that are in the background alongside that.

I can't stand companies increasingly asking for personal info via text or on chat when you are on an app. Do they have zero idea how many scammers would do this? Why do companies make us so vulnerable to this? Prove to me you know who I am so I know I'm not communicating with a Nigerian Prince!

You can't blame them for asking, data is so valuable, that's why all the various store cards exist.
I always so "nah you're alright", although I am tempted to set up a really shocking email address and give it out to them. Something like [email protected]

You sound lovely and I’m sure most shop assistants couldn’t care less if they lost your custom after not paying heed to your ‘warning’ 🤣

You aren't entitled to a paper receipt. You aren't even entitled to get one at all for most cases.

Should also point out that almost no shops are selling emails. Most don't get enough to make even pocket change from selling, let alone cover the cost of getting caught. In 99.9% of cases it's just paranoia.

For years and years I said “no thank you” when asked if I wanted an email receipt.
….until I’d lost the receipt for an expensive item from Debenhams which I wanted to return.
They refused to refund without the receipt- as their right - but said that if I’d had the email receipt there wouldn’t have been a problem.

Haven't shopped at New Look since they refused a paper receipt with a smirk about a year ago. They're shutting down here now I hear. Don't often shop at Matalan for similar reasons. Holland and Barratt don't insist but it still puts me off. You don't need my name and address to sell a bag of nuts.

You ARE entitled to a receipt if their Returns policy demands one.

And they do indeed sell email addresses. I used to work for a direct mailing company that bought them!

Agree, just say No. I had to offer this shit for years , you get seriously bollocked if you don't.

Agree about the email address. I just tell them that I don't have one but I'd like a receipt please. Job done.
Dunelm is the worst shop for this where the queues are very long whilst the staff are forced to ask these inane questions. Personally I'd rather have a speedier checkout experience.

So what happens if you're one of the many (mainly elderly) customers who doesn't just not want to give out your email address, but doesn't actually have one or use the internet at all?

Do they take pity and condescendingly hold back on the lies if they can see you're elderly; or do they just have an effective policy that deliberately seeks to take away consumer rights disproportionately from older customers?

I have no issue at all with them asking if you'd like an email receipt - I'm sure a lot of people prefer this for fewer bits of paper clutter and easier to keep track of, and don't object to other people in earshot hearing their email address; but if the answer is "No, thanks, just a normal one, please" or if somebody willingly declines a receipt altogether, that should be the end of the matter.

I'm sure that the shops want access to as many people's email addresses for marketing as possible, but absolutely nobody owes it to them. I agree with PP that predatory behaviour like this will expedite the death of the high street.

I happily buy things online from Curry's, but I would be loath to set foot inside one of their actual bricks-and-mortar stores again, as the pressure and guilt-tripping on people who want to buy a product and just hand over the amount on the price tag - without any suspiciously-expensive extra accessories, supplementary goods or rip-off warranties that only double up on your basic consumer rights anyway - is insane.

Yes, I can be unbowed and stand my ground firmly; but when you see the look on the face of the poor assistant and hear the huge disappointment in their voice when they realise that they'll be punished/sanctioned/berated as a direct result of your single-item purchase, it's not the most charming retail atmosphere.

The white company is particularly difficult with this, as they want postal code email and name their system is soo slow it takes a long time.

I love their stuff but I often give up on their mailing liat stuff

Not in the way people are actually concerned about. There is no risk in any normal marketing list sales and sharing to normal compliant companies. And it requires explicit permission. It can't be preselected. You can't hide it in terms and conditions. The buyer of a list is responsible legally if the list has any emails without permission. It doesn't go out and and shared forever, that one business partner can if everything was perfectly done, use it for marketing. But nothing else, they can't sell it on or share it again. The vast majority off places would spend more doing things properly, than they would realistically make.

What people are always scared of, is very different to the reality. It's odd you don't know that, what kind of dodgy business did you work for?

There is nothing in legislation that requires a receipt. If they don't use them and that causes issues due to their policies later, that's a civil dispute after the fact. But doesn’t change anything what you are legally entitled to.

They should be. All those high street chains that have been and gone started on their demise by not bothering about a customer walking out of their store who went in with the intention of spending money. Whatever reason a customer does this should be a real concern for any retail business, because they won't be the only one. Data gathering like shops are now doing is alienating a significant section of their customer base at a time they really can not afford to do it.

But you credit them with far more integrity than most of them have.

Some use small-print and get you to 'voluntarily' sign that you've read their 5,000 words of terms. The same with intrusive online cookies - especially the reprehensible weasel concept of 'legitimate interest' - where they know that most people will 'consent' rather than have to click to deselect 854 separate permissions individually (and even then accidentally undo it all at the end by clicking the big bright red 'accept all' button rather than the little dull grey one to confirm their choices).

Why would they really be so desperate and insistent in pushing people to give their email addresses - often using blatant lies and manipulation - if they genuinely only wanted to email you your receipt (and incidentally make it easier for you to change your mind and return purchases)? The cost of a receipt and a bit of ink per purchase is negligible, so it clearly isn't that.

And this is before we even get to the issue of careless data leaks and their 'carefully selected partners' - including those who work internationally, so UK law is useless in protecting you.

When they say "Your privacy is important to us", it's crucial to remember that they actually mean in the exact same way as your handbag is 'important' to a mugger.

Other than under the former law that required people buying TV-receiving equipment to provide their names and addresses so that it could be cross-checked with TV licensing to see if that address had a licence - and even that law was stupid as they would then still pursue you if the licence at your address was in your spouse's name, not to mention if you had bought a TV for business premises or as a present for/on behalf of somebody who didn't live with you - I find it very concerning that you appear to consider people wanting to guard their own private information and not give it away to any old business that wants to exploit it and share it with all and sundry for marketing purposes as 'nonsense'.

My nearest local Lidl some while back started asking if you wanted a paper receipt and it seemed as if it was a bit of a faff to some of them if you said yes, waiting the two or three seconds it took to print it out.

Fast forward to several months ago and you now have to have a receipt which they give you automatically so you can get through the automatic barrier to exit the shop. 🙄

Your friend needs to write to the company officially requiring them to remove all her personal information from their database and not contact her. They have to comply under data protection law (UK GDPR and the data protection act 2018).

Yes, definitely - this is actual harassment and abusive. Not that she should have to, of course, but she should make sure that she's signed up to the TPS (if they're a UK company) and, when they call again, say to them "I hereby withdraw any and all perceived consent to you contacting me on this number - please do not call again. If I receive any more calls from you from now on, I will report you to the police for harassment".

Spam post, texts and emails are irritating enough; but actually phoning somebody to market to them, without their explicit consent to this, is stalky behaviour. I'm surprised they even think it's worth their time, unless she's very wealthy and they think they can cajole her into spending a lot of money with them.

Telephone voice calls used to be such a brilliant facility, but now they're so widely abused by scammers, spammers and other nuisances, they've lost most of their usefulness now except for when the caller can be identified as somebody you actually want to speak to before answering (about 5% of the calls that I receive).

I've had run ins with New Look over this.

I just say that I don't have an email address. And if they won't accept that I leave and buy elsewhere.