Funding everyone to have multiple children???

[MyLimeGuide]

Hello all, this issue seriously gets me down, as someone who has worked solidly since forever (im 45) always wanted 2 children. I have 1, realised I cant afford 2, seeing what labour have done, lifting the 2 child cap for benefits MADDENS me to the core! Not because of my own circumstances, im more than happy with one and I can give him everything.
Im a teacher, currently working in a SEN school, the majority of the cohort are from non working families with multiple siblings. Their biggest problem is neglect. Often these kids tell us their mum is pregnant again!!
i have seen this pattern with neglected children un every single school ive worked in. Unbelievable that Labour want to increase this!
It's not to help children, its the opposite.
Its unfair on hardworking people to be expected to fund it.
I believe EVERYONE is entitled to be a parent, regardless of circumstances, but NOT breed like its a hobby (a freeloading one with no care)

AIBU - Let everyone breed as much as they want regardless of circumstances its their god given right.

AINBU - This is unfair, children should be born into families that can afford to look after them fully and offer them the time and nurture they need to develop into humans with good mental health.

The people I know with children with autism are great parents.

I suspect it's like all things there will be children with autism with great and bad parents and children without who have great and bad parents.

This is very true my teen is severely autistic, non verbal etc its obvious to anyone now hes disabled.

It's a massive spectrum my sons issues have more to do with his chromosome deletion, regardless of my parenting.

Every parent I know who has a sen child are great parents who put their kids first, yes you get the occasional one you raise a eyebrow at but it’s a rarity.

Brilliant post 👏 👏 👏

You're missing my point @MyLimeGuide , you don't become a billionnaire fair and square, it is not an opportunity open to you or I no matter how hard we work.

What occupation could possibly be 'worth' it, how many hours per week could be worth it? It would be many multiples of 168 hours.

Jeff Bezos has far more of your share of the cash than a family of 5 claiming benefits.

I would really like to see a universal basic income tgat does not penalise parents whose work is low paid. That would incentivise work like nothing else and give people autonomy and dignity.

What a lovely person you are. What do you do for work?

A child is autistic or they're not. Fecklessness has nothing to do with it. You realise that some of the wealthiest work obsessed people are autistic?

I'm single and childfree and am glad the cap has been lifted.

I wouldn’t be surprised if they work with children and families. It’s pretty much what I would say.

Maybe not the castration or the financial benefit of it all.

You work with children and you believe most autism is due to neglect and poor parenting?

I don't know why but seeing repeated references to women "breeding" and "being breeders" especially coming from other women, is giving me the ick.

It's quite dehumanising tbh 🤷 we're reducing women to being nothing more than animals because we don't agree with them.

I think it's entirely possible to have an actual debate about it without stooping to that level ? Or it should be 🤔🤷

The benefit cap goes if you work 16 hours a week.

No you silly. Issues with autism and mental health. Issues and causes are 2 very different words. Or did you purposely try to put words in my mouth?

That poster said "huge amount of the issues children have with autism and mental health issues is a direct result of shitty, neglectful parenting. Not all, but a lot of it."

Which sounds a lot like autism is being suggested as one of the issues that is caused by ("a direct result of") poor parenting. I don't think this is a particularly skewed reading of that poster's statement or "putting words" in anyone's mouths, but please, do clarify what you think the "issues" with autism are.

I know, no one gives a fuck how many children men have because not many of them are with them all at the same time.

I think it's absolutely dehumanising to refer to women as serial breeders, agreed.

I hope you don’t get shot down for this. You’re highlighting the real issue here. People need to stop being naive to it.

Hard working people get UC, not just those not working. It just means their employer isn’t paying a living wage. Maybe those people care about their children and will spend the extra money on improving their children’s lives. Not everyone getting UC is work shy, alcoholic and a druggie. Most are normal families just not fortunate enough to earn a good wage. They will include your nursery staff, your cleaners, those caring for your grandma…

Your despair is justified.

Labour are taking from people who make responsible choices and giving to those irresponsible people who don’t feel like they need to make any compromises at all. People who work hard to earn and support themselves have to take from their own children to give to these people. Hope this helps people wake up to the welfare state gravy train and vote to end this madness.

This myth about benefits claimants being working families needs to be busted. Working 16 hours to claim endless benefits is not working. It’s gaming the system.

Things I hear daily

”He’s autistic he can’t do that.”
“They’re autistic what do you expect?”
”Good luck he/she has been a fucking nightmare this morning” (usually being shoved into the classroom)
”Wait till you meet the younger one, they’re way worse!!!”
”What do you want me to do. They’re autistic.”
”He’s going to have an awful day because of [insert action of the day]”

These are parents. This is our issue. Not the child. These comments are the reason expectations are low and behaviour happens. This is pretty clear and obvious to me.

I work full time and still get some UC top up. It isn’t just those working minimum hours. I’m looking after the kids of you much higher earners for ten hours a day. Maybe childcare fees need to increase to the point childcare practitioners can get the same wage as teachers and other professionals. Except most of you earning over £50k wouldn’t want that even though you are annoyed the government might actually help the children of my coworkers (mine are grown now). Early years professionals have extensive training and have taken on the roles of many other professionals such as SALT and health visitors. They are also more trained in autism awareness and global delay than many other professionals yet their wages are barely above minimum wage so their families still need top ups.

All these posts are assuming low income means dossers. It doesn’t. It means the people who were key workers in Covid and put their lives at risk for the country.

Your post pretty much is where we get the "deserving and underserving" poor from, its what got us the Work house.

What party would end this "madness?" it wont be Badenoch's Tories, she was a Govt minister whilst the benefits bill went through the roof.

So that leaves Reform, which to be fair would give us the Work House & imho it would prove popular too.

This country has changed a great deal.

Look I’m not some big softy who makes excuses for everyone I was arguing in favour of keeping the cap earlier but having a child with autism can be very hard work and parents are coping as best they can and no I do not have children with autism but I see all my friends go through with her autistic child the meltdowns ripping off nappies and smearing poo (older child not a toddler).

I know for a fact I wouldn’t be able to cope