Why don't people take their kids on holiday?

[Micnerhss]

Just to be clear, I don’t mean people who genuinely can’t afford holidays... I’m talking about people who can but still don’t.

In my close friendship group, I’m literally the only one who takes my kids away. We love seeing the world, exploring new places, different cultures, and just getting out of the UK for a bit. I honestly think holidays are so important, its proper family time away from the constant busyness of life.

But none of my really close friends ever take their kids away, not even for a little UK break, and I just can’t get my head around it.

The excuses are things like “I don’t know how airports work” or “I wouldn’t know where to go”… but there’s a whole world out there!

If you can afford it, why wouldn’t you treat your kids to a holiday?! They are missing out on so much by never leaving the UK!

maybe I just plan better for my ASD Child....

Rude, much?!

One man's "tight" is another man's "frugal". Each to their own

Also, I do enjoy holidays, but can easily understand why someone else might prefer to spend the same amount of money redecorating a room they use all year round

Again, they are not mandatory?

Just saying that, on the parents point of view, there's absolutely no difference to organise a party for 15 or a class party. There's no work, or more work, involved, that's all.

No but you have the party the kid wants? Class parties were sports halls with bouncy castles, those weren’t the kinds of parties mine wanted.

why do you keep saying that? no one is telling you you SHOULD have class parties, have the parties you want 😂

Let's not pretend it's a burden, that is all. if you don't want them, don't have them. All I am saying is that inviting half a class or an entire class + some other friends to a soft play is exactly the same for the parents.

I don't know many kids who refuse to go to a class party when they are invited, I am not sure why you are taking it so personally.

Maybe I missed the first part of the conversation, but this thread is bashing parents who don’t take their kids on holiday, so I assumed the mention of class parties was in the context of bashing parents who don’t do them, so I was just saying I don’t see class parties as being on the same level of experience as holidays, most people I know holiday regularly, class parties are much less common (and indeed even parties in general, I noticed a big drop off post covid) so it just seems a weird comparison.

i have no desire to take my kids on holiday, they are 1 and 4. The 1 year old is quite inconvenient to take places and the 4 year old has food allergies which makes meals challenging - everything is made at home. similar with DH who is on a restricted diet so buying food out while in-transit is impossible.

honestly a holiday just seems like a lot of work with not much upside.

I disagree. I don’t think that the kind of holidays most people take (beach / holiday) are valuable to children & so don’t prioritise them. I find city breaks more educational but only after a certain age when you can expect them to make their orders in the language / try and understand cultures and that is usually after 7. Instead in the early years I make multiple (expensive) trips per year that centre around UK museums / zoos / wildlife parks / pond dipping / food / camping.

I’m wealthy, I travel a lot personally and for work, but for me it’s a value judgement.

Another silly argument, planes don't just keep flying if there's no demand.

I apologise we live in a dull country and there’s more beautiful world out there to be seen and explored and as I was saying she won’t be the only person getting on any plane so she’s more than entitled to use that form of travel and go on a well deserved holiday to a beautiful country that has more to offer than the UK. You people are crazy that are against people LIVING how they want to. I am not stopping flying because Susan down the road is frightful of what happens to the environment or what ever even is the concern. It’s a normal part of living and a beautiful thing to do. If it was that bad planes wouldn’t exist.

We take my dc and dsc away on holidays. We've had some great and very memorable times, I think it really helps family bonding particularly with blended families. I'd love to be able to afford more and go to adventurous/long-haul places but we simply can't afford it for all of us.
My ex however takes our dc nowhere. He has holidays with his wife but they never invite our dc along. They are tight, selfish tossers.

It’s not either or, though, is it. Children who are taken travelling don’t necessarily miss out on museums and the theatre. In fact, in my experience, the best travelled are also the most cultured in other ways too. And I completely disagree that a child gets nothing culturally from a beach holiday. Being in a foreign country, where people speak a different language, the food is different etc. is a learning experience. Mixing with children from other parts of the world or different parts of the UK. Snorkelling, sailing and other water activities. New experiences. Like I say upthread, travel - be it a city break in Rome, skiing in the alps, adventure holiday in Costa Rica, or sun & sea in Barbados - gives one intangible benefits in life.

This is a spectacularly silly post. Maybe you should pay more attention to Susan from down the road.

I wont stop going on holiday and this thread isn't here to debate the environmental impact around flying. I'm going to do it anyway and its not the reason my friends dont take their kids abroad.

Well I've never heard of anyone being impressed by 2 hours in a sticky floored Playbarn and a bubble disco to S Club 7 but I think kids should have the parties they want to have, within reason of course.

DD's had the whole class in the past but this year she's having only the girls as that's what she wanted.

The point I was making is that organising parties is a bit of a slog for everyone but we do it because it's part of what makes childhood for many children- whether that's the whole class in a soft play or 3 best friends at a sleepover or whatever.

Gosh, the argument got even sillier, I didn't think that possible.

You created the thread to question why everyone isn't exactly like you, we're giving reasons.

Increasingly, though, with the rise and rise of All Inclusives, people aren't eating different food, the kids are playing with the other Brit kids in the resort, etc.

It's getting harder and harder now to have affordable holidays that aren't so catered to the tourist that you'll be lucky to meet anybody from the country you are in unless they are serving you (and, increasingly, not even then, which is part of the current issue with tourism).

I went abroad twice as a child, once was to Greece. I fondly remember playing with the Greek child whose parents owned the apartment we stayed in. These days, it's hard to find locally owned establishments that give you that connection. Even Airbnbs are more likely to be owned by an offshore investor now.

For me, mass tourism has changed the travel experience so that it really isn't this amazing experience of other cultures any more. I travelled across Morocco for the first time in the 90s. Barely saw any other white tourists except in Marrakech. Spent a lot of time drinking tea with locals, chatting to the owners of the very basic places we stayed. Highlight, for me, was the trip out into the desert. One building staffed by Berbers arose out of the sand after we travelled over a rough road from Erfoud. We were the only group there, had a great night chatting to the Berbers, etc.
Fast forward to 2013, we went back. Where that one building was is now a big complex, with 4x4's zipping over the desert, accessed by a tarmacked road and about four times as expensive. Still at least run by hospitable Berbers, but how long before that changes? How long before the multinationals buy the locals out, as has happened in so many other places? How long before the strangling monopoly of AI steamrollers in and shoves the locals out?

Wherever we go, we like to go local. Stay in locally owned accomodation, eat at local places. That is getting harder and harder to do.

I’ve never heard of anyone NOT taking their kids unless it’s a special anniversary break or something but few and far between.

Haven’t experienced this at all. We took our kids away unless it was for our anniversary and PIL minded them (very rare). When they were younger it was ‘easy’ holidays but as they got older we did more cultural/sightseeing breaks.
So they don’t go on holiday at all? That is odd - everyone needs a break from ‘the norm’.

Your friends sound odd.

You sound overly bothered by the choices they are making.

I don't know where you live, but I live in the UK. It's not remotely a dull country. It has spectacular scenery, fascinating historical buildings/ruins, museums, theatres, etc.

Yes, the thing that’s intriguing me is that all of the OP’s close friendship group can apparently afford to go on holiday but don’t, and say similar things about ‘not knowing how airports work/where to go”.

We travel a lot with our kids because we have family abroad, and honestly, it's so stressful sometimes, I can totally understand why people who are perhaps less used to travelling anyway would be reticent to do it with their kids. We travel abroad 2-4 times a year on average, but I decided I wanted to go somewhere different next year, and looking at the early flight times, complex journeys, having to hire a car and sort out car seats for the children, thinking about how we'll get around with a child who's too big for a pushchair but still too little to have the stamina for really long walks, then the thought of parenting young kids (which is already often overwhelming at home) except doing it abroad, without any of their stuff, and where they'll probably hate all the food, just seems so stressful. I know it'll be worth it, and we are still going to do it, but honestly I can understand why others don't, when their kids are young at least.