DH double booking Christmas arrangements

[whitewinefriday]

I am being deliberately vague about the details.

DH and I have plans with my family in mid December (Plan A). DH has now made arrangements with a friend of his (Plan B) which clash. Its not a total clash, but its highly likely that Plan A will be impacted in some way by Plan B. I have asked DH to find another date to see his friend and he said he would try.

But if he can't find another date, and my family plans end up being impacted, am I within my rights to decline to attend an arrangement with his family, the following week?

He needs to honour the first commitment (to seeing your family). If this means he’s an hour or two late to see his friend, then he’s an hour or two late. 🤷🏻‍♀️ He caused the clash and he’ll just not be there when he’s meant to be. Put the complications on him to sort out, but I’d be clear that your original plans stay as they are.

Personally I just couldn’t be arsed with this level of pettiness. I never expect DH to come and see my family and likewise he doesn’t expect me to see his.

I know I’d be much happier seeing a friend than I would be visiting my in-laws so I really wouldn’t care if he felt the same way and made other plans.

So what are you going to do op?

Throw a massive strop and try to force him to cancel?

does he seem even the slightest bit inclined to cancel plan with friend?

It’s all very well posters telling you he’s being unreasonable
but not going to get you very far if he says - “I’ll be seeing my friend and that’s that!”