Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Middle earners punished

1000 replies

Eucalyptus321 · 25/11/2025 21:18

I am feeling so disheartened and frustrated by how middle earners are constantly suffering at the hands of ridiculous government priorities. My husband and I have a greater household income than other families we know but have less cash in hand due to increased taxes coupled with the fact we receive zero benefits like child benefit or tax free childcare etc. ZERO. If they want middle earners to fund the country thought tax then at least support us with childcare costs. It’s a joke that two parents earning £99k each get childcare funding but parents with one £101k salary and one £25k salary receive nothing. I just need to speak to people who understand the burden of raising a family amidst the current financial climate and then the potential of further tax rises!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
hottentot · 26/11/2025 07:17

DoubleShotEspressox · 26/11/2025 07:13

You’re allowed to be pissed off Op. I’m in the same boat, working my nuts off to be at zero at the end of each month yet on paper we should be great.

But you won’t get an objective argument here. All the “I earn 20k and I’m mortgage free simply by being sensible” bullshit when someone inherited a house up north 30 years.

H and I are based in SE, earn collectively 150k ish, small house (absolutely fucked on mortgage rates) childcare, food alone each week making me want to cry. Council tax £300 each month and I can’t even get a GP appointment.

We’ve been working so hard when the kids were small to give them a better life and I think now what was the point? We grew up with nothing as children and wanted better for our own, but I should have sacked it off, worked PT or not at all to be in essentially the same position as I am now.

Absolutely this 😊

Theroadt · 26/11/2025 07:17

Beddiem · 25/11/2025 21:28

You’re a crap earner living in a cheap part of the country so it’s easy for you.

I agree OP. I’m looking to move. I’m a renewable energy engineer and though there are lots of jobs here the tax is terrible, everyone hates you for rolling in it, services are shite so I’m looking to move to Poland where I have family..

Agreed. Services are rubbish, and not necessarily funding issues but structural + lack of work ethic.

Bunnycat101 · 26/11/2025 07:20

There is a problem when higher earners feel they have to buckle down. You lose a bit of hope and expectation that life can be more enjoyable but also that trickles down to other people’s jobs. Objectively we’re a high earning household but we definitely don’t have the life I’d have expected for the income. Now some of that is a choice- we’re currently paying for private school for one child but we have been hit very heavily with VAT.

In turn, to fund that additional expense we have cut expenditure. We used to have a cleaner and someone to help us with the garden. Both of those have now gone which has had a knock on impact on the income of those individuals. We have cut down on our food shop and we’re not eating out as much. If other people are the same, that will be hitting the economy

Re the minimal wage increases… my husband ran the numbers for the company he works for. That represents over £700k cost for them that they don’t have easily to hand. That means prices will have to go up or job losses, probably both. Businesses are also really struggling at the moment and not every company is like Amazon with massive profits. If they squeeze too hard on business; everything will come crashing down.

Slothisavirtue · 26/11/2025 07:21

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 26/11/2025 05:55

Your friend wont be a home owner and will not have a significant pension scheme which the employer contributes to.

This is the incentive to work. You own property, heritable estate, and have a decent pension at the end of it.

Your friend will likely never be in any sort of position to provide their children with any sort of leg-up in life, whether that's helping with education fees, accommodation fees, or helping them get a foothold on the property ladder by providing them with a deposit. They are unlikely to ever be able to amass any sort of savings, contribute to their children's weddings, take their grandchildren on holiday, or do much of anything with their own life beyond simply subsisting. Heaven help them if they ever need any form of care, because without wealth and assets of their own they are entirely at the mercy of whatever the local authority sees fit to provide for them.

Does it still sound like a cushy life?

But people in the middle ( who have a similar net income to.someome on benefits ) may end up losing the entire value of the home they bought in care fees. Whereas the person on benefits.will get the care for free. And pension credit means if you only save a modest pension the person who lived on benefits will probably end up on a similar income

Their children will get scholarships it they go to university and are likely to get places on all sorts of access to university schemes

I am still going to work, because I love my job and it makes a difference. But I can see why we have a productivity crisis. If I am working with a chronic health condition why should my taxes pay for someone else to make a lifestyle choice to live on benefits

LittleBearPad · 26/11/2025 07:21

Limered · 25/11/2025 22:58

To pay £40k in tax means you earn £150k roughly

It’s fascinating as that sounds like an accusation!

Rubbertreesurgeon · 26/11/2025 07:22

Eucalyptus321 · 25/11/2025 21:18

I am feeling so disheartened and frustrated by how middle earners are constantly suffering at the hands of ridiculous government priorities. My husband and I have a greater household income than other families we know but have less cash in hand due to increased taxes coupled with the fact we receive zero benefits like child benefit or tax free childcare etc. ZERO. If they want middle earners to fund the country thought tax then at least support us with childcare costs. It’s a joke that two parents earning £99k each get childcare funding but parents with one £101k salary and one £25k salary receive nothing. I just need to speak to people who understand the burden of raising a family amidst the current financial climate and then the potential of further tax rises!

Let me know if you want to swap with me. Disabled children, can only work very reduced hours on a low paid job (I was a high tax payer before having the DC and had to throw my career away). No break, no respite, no holiday, no nothing - I have no life (but yes we get some benefits but I can assure you, life is pretty shit and you wouldn't last in my shoes a day). Check your privilege!

also your aren't a 'middle' but a very high earner.

northernballer · 26/11/2025 07:23

Bunnycat101 · 26/11/2025 07:20

There is a problem when higher earners feel they have to buckle down. You lose a bit of hope and expectation that life can be more enjoyable but also that trickles down to other people’s jobs. Objectively we’re a high earning household but we definitely don’t have the life I’d have expected for the income. Now some of that is a choice- we’re currently paying for private school for one child but we have been hit very heavily with VAT.

In turn, to fund that additional expense we have cut expenditure. We used to have a cleaner and someone to help us with the garden. Both of those have now gone which has had a knock on impact on the income of those individuals. We have cut down on our food shop and we’re not eating out as much. If other people are the same, that will be hitting the economy

Re the minimal wage increases… my husband ran the numbers for the company he works for. That represents over £700k cost for them that they don’t have easily to hand. That means prices will have to go up or job losses, probably both. Businesses are also really struggling at the moment and not every company is like Amazon with massive profits. If they squeeze too hard on business; everything will come crashing down.

Brilliant post - we are in exactly the same boat right down to the schooling.

God knows what the answer is.

Benjithedog · 26/11/2025 07:23

springintoaction2 · 26/11/2025 05:33

Oh dear - poor you. with your DH earning in excess of £100k.

Suck.It.Up.

He is not a 'middle earner' and you won't be getting sympathy from a lot of people. If you don't want to work and stay at home to look after your children that is definitely an option for you.

In fact you have many options that only money can bring - so stop with the whingeing.

If you are a taxpayer then you have every right to express how you feel about it.

PoppyFleur · 26/11/2025 07:23

Ionlymakejokestodistractmyself · 25/11/2025 22:21

DH earns JUST over the child benefit cut off (60k) so we don't get any benefits at all (kids no longer in nursery so we don't use tax free childcare) but earn at least £40k pre tax less than your DH which is going to be a minimum of £24,000 per year. God, what I could do with that money. Wanna swap, OP?

What is stopping you or your husband from achieving earning over £100k? Stop trying to imagine what you would do with the extra £2k and put your plan into action - you seem to imply it’s easy!

I mean yes, in my experience, you will regularly have to work a 70 hour week (unless you find one of those unicorn jobs where it’s 9-5 for over £100k), but for most of us, the path to that salary is gruelling. Early starts commuting on freezing cold trains in winter, because at 6am the heating on the trains haven’t fully kicked in. Leaving the house in the dark, returning in the dark. Working every Sunday evening. That’s the corporate world for many on over £100k. Frankly, even that is a bit of a walk in the park compared to reaching that salary as a doctor. Don’t get into a pissing contest with a doctor (or their long suffering other half) on how tough the journey is to earning over £100k.

I am being facetious, because I know people who work extremely hard and for far less money (my own parents for example, my mum was a hotel chambermaid and that is truly back breaking work and my dad didn’t live long enough to receive his state pension). Neither DH or I grew up wealthy or even comfortably off, we were motivated to work hard and we did. But there have been massive sacrifices to achieving this, including delaying having a child, and only having one child because childcare costs were equivalent to our eye watering mortgage on our SE home. We have never received any state assistance. We don’t expect medals and we pay our taxes because that is the only way a functioning society can survive. However, it is galling to be faced with increased tax rises and comments from people who say “oh, what I could do with all that extra money.” Because in my experience it is going on childcare, holiday clubs, after school clubs etc. to allow the parents to keep working the long hours needed.

If there is no financial incentive to work longer hours for those on UC, it is equally the same for those on over £100k. DH is looking at dropping hours, I already have. Multiply this across the board and it explains the productivity gap in the UK. Fewer high earners contributing tax is not a good thing.

I’ll stop ranting now.

Beddiem · 26/11/2025 07:24

LittleBearPad · 26/11/2025 07:21

It’s fascinating as that sounds like an accusation!

Edited

Earn 150k and you pay £58k in tax actually, £65k in Scotland.

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:25

I feel nervously optimistic that today’s budget will
mark the beginning of the end for Reeves and Starmer.

dottiehens · 26/11/2025 07:25

Yolo12345 · 25/11/2025 21:23

I know it is hard but I honestly advise you not to compare. At the end of your career, you might own a home, whilst others may not. You might have a happy family, whilst others struggle, above all, you might have healthy children, whilst others do not. My sister, who is a high earner would give everything she owns to cure her son (his condition is not curable). I am not blessed physically but I do not feel jealous of other people’s beauty…it has taken quite a lot of work to get there. Now when I see someone beautiful, I think “how wonderful the human race is”… I am happier for this mental training…I owe a lot to yoga, for example. Good luck.

Oh please just don’t. Now they are going after home owners too. There is no end to this shitshow. It is unfair and unacceptable.

Coffeeandbooks88 · 26/11/2025 07:27

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:25

I feel nervously optimistic that today’s budget will
mark the beginning of the end for Reeves and Starmer.

Who are you going to get instead because I don't see anyone better.

LoopyLeela · 26/11/2025 07:27

dottiehens · 26/11/2025 07:25

Oh please just don’t. Now they are going after home owners too. There is no end to this shitshow. It is unfair and unacceptable.

It's entirely.possible to own a home and still recieve universal credit. I know a lot of people who do.

Beddiem · 26/11/2025 07:28

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:25

I feel nervously optimistic that today’s budget will
mark the beginning of the end for Reeves and Starmer.

But I think whoever will replace them will be worse. Tories might address the disability benefits but not the triple lock. But I think it’ll be Reform who get in.

LittleBearPad · 26/11/2025 07:28

Beddiem · 26/11/2025 07:24

Earn 150k and you pay £58k in tax actually, £65k in Scotland.

I think you may have missed the point.

Benjithedog · 26/11/2025 07:28

XDownwiththissortofthingX · 26/11/2025 05:55

Your friend wont be a home owner and will not have a significant pension scheme which the employer contributes to.

This is the incentive to work. You own property, heritable estate, and have a decent pension at the end of it.

Your friend will likely never be in any sort of position to provide their children with any sort of leg-up in life, whether that's helping with education fees, accommodation fees, or helping them get a foothold on the property ladder by providing them with a deposit. They are unlikely to ever be able to amass any sort of savings, contribute to their children's weddings, take their grandchildren on holiday, or do much of anything with their own life beyond simply subsisting. Heaven help them if they ever need any form of care, because without wealth and assets of their own they are entirely at the mercy of whatever the local authority sees fit to provide for them.

Does it still sound like a cushy life?

But if they worked they just might achieve all this. I feel little sympathy for someone who does not work complaining that they don’t have the same as everyone else when it could be easily remedied by getting a job.

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:29

Coffeeandbooks88 · 26/11/2025 07:27

Who are you going to get instead because I don't see anyone better.

I honestly couldn’t give one, because it means they’ve gone for a reason and the next will be constrained in terms of the policies they can implement.

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:29

Beddiem · 26/11/2025 07:28

But I think whoever will replace them will be worse. Tories might address the disability benefits but not the triple lock. But I think it’ll be Reform who get in.

That works.

Remember, Labour brought this upon themselves.

dottiehens · 26/11/2025 07:30

LoopyLeela · 26/11/2025 07:27

It's entirely.possible to own a home and still recieve universal credit. I know a lot of people who do.

High earners and mansion tax? Plus private schools VAT, income tax, council tax increase. When does it end?

EasternStandard · 26/11/2025 07:30

springintoaction2 · 26/11/2025 05:33

Oh dear - poor you. with your DH earning in excess of £100k.

Suck.It.Up.

He is not a 'middle earner' and you won't be getting sympathy from a lot of people. If you don't want to work and stay at home to look after your children that is definitely an option for you.

In fact you have many options that only money can bring - so stop with the whingeing.

Good luck with that line of attack. There’s no point in disincentivising work and earning. Everyone needs those taxes.

Beddiem · 26/11/2025 07:30

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:29

That works.

Remember, Labour brought this upon themselves.

Exactly. Take the bold decisions people want to see or someone else will.

hazelnutvanillalatte · 26/11/2025 07:32

Slipperati · 26/11/2025 07:04

This is very true. The leg up in life comes from being on benefits now.

I’m sick of it. I believe in a strong welfare system but ours is a joke now. It’s not welfare, it’s freebies and handouts.

I am from a disadvantaged background so I am part of a lot of groups where I have a lot of insight into the system and help available - it is honestly crazy. I have friends on UC who take their kids regularly to the cinema, baby gym, theme parks, go out for coffee, buy branded food - we can't do any of this at all. There is even now a low income savings account where you put £50 in and it gets doubled and you can keep it under 6000 to avoid it impacting any claims. I don't begrudge any of my friends or anything because at a certain point it becomes a logical decision. The question is why we are allowing it to be the logical decision.

As I said, my friend even has her child in private school at no cost, and on top of that will get priority for university (usually private school applicants have that counted against them). No worries about housing, extra hardship fund to help with bills, work stress. Stripping benefits back to basics is seen as mean and deprivation, but the alternative is that people have a better quality of life on them.

HermioneWeasley · 26/11/2025 07:32

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:25

I feel nervously optimistic that today’s budget will
mark the beginning of the end for Reeves and Starmer.

I agree they’re both incompetent but who in the Labour party do you think will be any better? They’re incapable of doing anything but tax and not just spend but give it away in welfare

Klipspringer · 26/11/2025 07:32

EasternStandard · 26/11/2025 07:30

Good luck with that line of attack. There’s no point in disincentivising work and earning. Everyone needs those taxes.

Fear not - the government will pay…

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is not accepting new messages.
Swipe left for the next trending thread