People older than 35; did your dad go to school parent’s evenings?

[Farrings]

I asked my parents to look after our daughters for an hour (they’re primary age) so DH and I could both go to parents evening.

Both kids are at the same school so it’s no bother, and we care equally about their education, so we both want to go.

My dad (born 1943) asked ‘What’s parents evening?!’ He denied any knowledge of the concept, and said he’d never been to one. He has 3 kids who were all in school in the 90’s/early 2000’s.

To be fair, I’m not sure my mum went to many either… they’re not great with supporting formal education…but I was still surprised to hear my Dad say he didn’t even know what one was!

Then I thought, was this normal for the time maybe?

if you’re over 35, please vote -

YANBU - ‘My dad didn’t go to parents evenings either, (or maybe like, one time)!’

YABU - My dad DID GO! Or a few times anyway!

(Obviously whether or not Mum’s went is a whole other question, I will have to save that for another vote)

P.S This is Just for fun! X

I'm 35 exactly so apologies if you didn't want me - but my dad was always at parents evening and every other event with my mum. We were lucky enough for my grandparents to be able to come and babysit my brother and I when we were young enough to need it, to allow them both to go. Obviously not everybody would have that option.

I’m 48 and no, my Dad didn’t go to parents’ eves because he wasn’t home from work in time. He would have liked to have gone I think as he regarded education as very important and would have liked to have spoken directly to our teachers to see how things were going. But he commuted to London from Sussex so usually didn’t get home till 7 or 8pm. I also rarely had a parent at a sports day or school play because my Mum was a Primary teacher so couldn’t usually attend (I know many schools are better nowadays with facilitating teachers going to their own children’s school events).

I was born in 1955. Both my parents attended.

My kids are now 36 and 38. Their dad and I both attended.

My father (born in the 1920s) went to pretty much all of mine (born 1960s) except on rare occasions when he was out of the country. Both my parents had been teachers before coming to the UK to study - and both came from families where education (and intellectual life) was central. So it wouldn’t have occurred to them not to go.

Houseful of books, unlimited leisure time for reading and talking and listening to music, Oxbridge aspirations from primary school age … All that. I guess I was lucky.

My parents agreed that he'd go to mine and she'd go to my brothers

Then they had twins so she went to theirs

He really hated going as they told him I was 'thick' 'behind' and 'a lost cause who won't amount to much'

Nothing to do with the fact my face didnt fit,I was bullied by both the other children and teachers,had a shitty and neglectful home life and am dyslexic

As soon as I got to secondary school,the bullying stopped,I kept myself to myself so it didnt matter if my face fitted or not and I just tried to get on with things-try hard and do my best

For a very intelligent man,I must have been a massive disappointment

(and they'll never admit to me being dyslexic as they think it doesn't exist-if i heard one more time about 'education standards have slipped into nothing-dyslexia is just an excuse for shitty teachers' i would have screamed-it is very real-i live with it everyday)

I’m 53. No. That counted as ‘women’s work’, though my mother often didn’t go either — she was frightened of them, and didn’t understand what they were suppose to be for. Plus they both wanted me to leave school at 15, so I think they felt it would have been encouraging me in the wrong direction to pay much attention to my education.

I think he went once. He was very introverted though and my mum wasn't.

I'm in my mid 50s and yes, my father went to parents' evenings - but there was only one a year.

Both went to primary, neither went to secondary. They'd broken up at that point and I was living with mum, otherwise i think he would have done.

I don't think my dad did parents evenings, he stayed at home and looked after my younger siblings. He went to the options evening when i was in year 9 and to my school concerts.

Never, but he certainly knew what they were, he wouldn't have been able to get out of work. Mum was a SAHM almost all the time so it made sense for one of them to do it and report back once home.

I'm coming up to 60. If my dad was home (he was a HGV driver so was away overnight sometimes), then he'd be there, so to answer your question, yes and no.

My dad was born in the 60s and never went. However this was because my mum went and he stayed home with us. He knew exactly what parents evenings were he just wasn't the designated parent for them.

My dad didn’t BUT my parents ran their own business (a pub) so the opening hours meant only one of them could go as one was always working. He would ask how it went of course.

Both my parents went to all parents evenings, those that they knew about that is. We were given the letter about parent's evening to take home and on one occasion I tore it up. I was asked by my form teacher why they hadn't attended and told her it was Mum's bingo night and Dad couldn't be bothered. I got into a fair bit of trouble over that at school and at home when my parents found out

Yes but only high school ones during GCSE years (and one other to go into bat for my sister who was getting a really hard time from a specific teacher).
He left school at 14 with no qualifications (dyslexic) so felt he needed to attend the later years to understand what we were doing!

I'm 41, dad born in 1952, he definitely went to some of them in primary and secondary. Couldn't be sure he did all of them, but he was involved!

1980s kid here and no, but as far as I remember the meetings were held around 4/5 so he wouldn't have been home from work. They must have assumed all mums were at home ! Dh and I both work and both go to our kids and at secondary we split the subjects according to what we know best.

I’m of 40+ and of Indian origin and in the UK town I’m from only Indian kids ever had both parents attending parents evening. All ethnic minority kids had at least mum or an older sibling. But only the white parents ever had 0 parents attend.

Looking back on it, I suppose it’s because it was a working class town and white people didn’t need formal qualifications at the time to get skilled factory work just connections (but people who weren’t white needed both).

I’m positive the reason why so many working class Indian kids got into office work / skilled service jobs / tech in the 90s is because they cottoned on early that if factories are requesting the same grades they might as well go for the higher salary.

Dad born 1938, CEO type roles, always went to parents' evening

No, never. He was a university lecturer (born 1942) and did take an interest in my education, but any dealings with our schools were very definitely my mother's job. It blew my mind when I realised that some of my friends' dads went.

Only me, never their dad (my husband born 1954)...

I remember him going to my first one in secondary school but I lived with him and my step mum at that time so they both took me. Don't ever remember him going to any others.

Every single one, I think. He was born in 1934. He drove, Mum didn't, so that was one reason, but he was just as interested in how we were getting on as Mum. Not unusual, IIRC.

My dad was born 37 and he went to them. He supported our education more than my mum did.