Flying as an unaccompanied minor at age 7

[CrispyClo]

I’m posting on behalf of my sister as she is looking for some external views on the matter.

My niece is 7, birthday was in August. She started a new school in September, which closes for Christmas a week earlier than most state schools. There don’t seem to be a lot of options for childcare during that week as not many schools here close that early so there aren’t any holiday camps.
My sister has booked my niece onto a week long camp abroad for the week. The camp is well reviewed and offers a pick up service for children flying as an unaccompanied minor. My sister initially felt this was a good idea, and booked it.
Now she is having some concerns and is unsure it’s the right choice, mainly as she appreciates 7 is quite young and while the flight isn’t particularly long, they don’t actually have someone sat with them, just cabin crew checking in. She has admitted herself she was fine with it until other people seemed to think it was a reckless parenting choice. I think it will be fine, my sister and I flew as unaccompanied minors often as our dad lived abroad, we were a bit older (maybe 10 the first time) but managed it fine.

AIBU to think my niece will be fine? She’s looking forward to the camp and doesn’t seem phased by the thought of it.

Wealthy people have the freedom to dump their kids wherever they like. They live in another world to most of us 😂

Im amused that some are suggesting childminder/ nanny, unless the child's mother already knows them, its still a stranger for a short period of time, not a trusted adult.

7 is young, I would probably have looked for an easier solution first but we also have very low expectations of young kids these days. Kids have mobile phones these days. Child can certainly contact parents if they are unhappy or a situation is uncomfortable for them. Its not like 50yrs ago where finding a phone box and hoping whoever we wanted to contact was in or even had a phone.

I flew as an unaccompanied minor at around this age, very short flight. This was decades ago. As far as I remember it was as you said. Someone took me onto the plane, cabin crew checked on me now and then during the flight, someone took me off the plane and handed me over to the people meeting me (friends of the family in this case).

I was fine with it.

i can understand the concern though

I think there is an element of cultural differences here. I note you say her dad is Belgian. In Belgium it is entirely normal for lower primary age kids to have a week away at a school or scout camp.

Threads like this at least serve the purpose of making those of us from normal non super rich but loving families feel that actually we got the better deal!

I know you say plans would be in place where she is accompanied on and off the plane etc but human error can and does happen.
Possibly everything would be fine but is your sister willing to take that chance?
I wouldn't

Lots of primary children in the UK go to Brownie or Scout camps. That's not the issue.
Mine did. They knew the other children, they knew the adults, it was a straightforward journey, we could drive there in an emergency.

The saddest thing about this for me is that your sister will have known the holdiay schedule when your DN started the school and instead of planning ahead and making better suited plans for a 7yo she is chucking her on a plane at the end of a long and busy school term where (when she should be enjoying a break from structure/learning) she will have to work very hard to ‘be brave’, understand people, make friends, try new food, master activities, be independent….WOW! Too much!
She should at or nearer home doing things like crafting, playing with her toys, watching xmas movies…my DC also break early and clubs are few and far between but there is absolutely provision out there. Hell, for the cost of an overseas camp and flight you could pay a student willing to earn a few bucks for xmas…

This whole thing is absolutely mental and so is boarding school for a 7 year old. I think a parent needs to book some time off work like the rest of us. I’m actually horrified that you think this is ok OP.

@WimpoleHat

...then the flight was cancelled and she had to stay in a hotel overnight and be waitlisted on a new flight. And I think that was a bit stressful for even an older teen on her own. Can you imagine an unaccompanied 7 year old in that scenaro? How would the “unaccompanied minors programme?

If it's properly run scheme once the minor is handed over to airline staff you'd expect a staff member to remain with the minor throughout any disruption, (that would include unscheduled night stops in hotels).

Would that be in another country with no one they knew though? Completely solo, at 7?

Boarding schools for girls under 11 aren't rare - beyond the fact that all prep boarding is fairly rare these days - most boarding prep schools are now co-ed.

A) don't make things up and b) the OP's sister isn't sending her 7 year old to boarding school, she's sending her to camp for a week. It is unusual to send a child abroad for camp in this country, but a PGL residential holiday would not be unusual from 8, so for a confident 7 year old, this isn't a huge leap from that.

The drama on this thread is something else..

Genuine question - would airline staff be allowed to stay overnight in a hotel room with an unrelated child? And what about the more prosaic - but let’s face it - pretty common occurrence where a flight is delayed for hours on end? Must be a pretty stressful experience for a 7 year old child on her own?

My DD and I were sitting across from a boy (who looked to be about 15) who was obviously an unaccompanied minor on Eurostar. They seemed very nice and he was clearly absolutely fine, but it’s fair to say he wasn’t supervised other than someone bringing him on and collecting him at the end (and maybe just “keeping a bit of an eye on him”). Fine at his age. Probably fine if he’d been 12 and at secondary school. But at 7?

“MinnieCauldwell · Today 08:59

PoorPhaedra · Today 08:55
I think there is an element of cultural differences here. I note you say her dad is Belgian. In Belgium it is entirely normal for lower primary age kids to have a week away at a school or scout camp.

Would that be in another country with no one they knew though? Completely solo, at 7?”

This - it’s one thing for a 7 yo to be in a residential camp in the same country. It’s different to be in a camp that is a flight away.

Our experience of sending the DC as unaccompanied minors (short flight, same country) was fine. Regarding the possible flight delays/changes, a parent had to stay at the airport until the flight had actually taken off. DH was sent through security too, so only had to say goodbye at the gate. Child was sat next to a female passenger and was checked regularly by cabin crew. They checked the I.D. details of the grandparent at the other end before handover. This was with Lufthansa, so will most likely be similar to Swiss.

Frankly, if a poor person suggested doing this to a 7 year old we'd all be talking about calling social services.

Even if unknown, the nanny would be in the child’s own home with their parent(s) coming home at the end of each day. It’s a very different prospect.

we sent our 8yo to a PGL camp because she asked to go. she was nearly 9 at that point, went for three nights and we picked the location nearest to us so we could drive her there and pick her up. how can you not see the MASSIVE difference between that and sending an unaccompanied 7yo away for over a week, plus transport time?

No way would I send mine abroad on their own for a week without a familiar person.

I recognise you’ve mentioned boarding school and tbh I wouldn’t do that either!! And especially so young. I think school is different as it’s often the same country with settling in, visits and key people to help.

Good god what have I just read. This is madness. Your poor niece. Not for nothing Matthew Perrys autobiography talks about how affected he was by flying as an unaccompanied minor.

Not a chance in hell I would do any of this, would rather lose my job.

Well all I know is I’d be worried sick the whole time (including the week away and the journey back) wondering what on earth I was thinking, so that would give me my answer if she was my child. Alone and seven? No.

I went on a flight alone when I was a similar age I think. Not to camp, so I was met the other side by family. I remember it being very exciting - I wasn't left to fend for myself in the airport if that is what people are imagining! I was accompanied by someone from the airport/airline from check in through to boarding the plane. There was a seperate waiting room with other solo children that we waited in before boarding. On the plane I remember we got given sweets to suck and the cabin crew checked on us regularly. They sat the solo flying children together so no weirdos...

Depends on the airline

BA and Lufthansa are excellent for looking after UMs
Ryanair and Air France are the worst
Others come in the middle

But plenty of 7 y/o UMs fly every day with no untoward incidents

YABU. Would be a bad idea all round.

Just in case it helps, private schools finish earlier than state schools and there are clubs that fill the gaps, often on the private school grounds. The clubs are usually open to all and are not solely for children of the private sector so might be worth checking that out.

Oh no I could never do this. My daughter is that age. I keep my eyes on her at all times. The only place she stays away from me is with family members. She's too young.

Btw when I was 11 my father lived overseas and I went alone to stay with him one summer. My mother dropped me to the airport, signed me over. I sat on the plane and the very nice woman and adult daughter struck up conversation with me. They helped me with my seatbelt and called the cabin crew when she overlooked me for the onboard meal. I spent a few weeks with my father but was homesick for my mum and siblings. I travelled back and coming through airport (I can't remember which one) security a staff member took me behind the machine, shoved her hands under my dress, rubbed my crotch and squeezed my painfully developing breasts.

I can't remember anything else except walking towards my family and feeling there was a vinyl cloak around me and I had to keep them out along with everyone else. I was disgusting and that's why she had groped me in those areas. To this day I freeze inwardly if I'm asked to step aside at security. In fact I didn't go through an airport for about ten years after that and the first time I did my boyfriend couldn't understand why I was crying. I never told him, I never told my family.

Tell your sister to keep her daughter in her sights.