Another childcare rant - how do people do it?!

[SMLSML]

If you and your partner both work how do you manage childcare? My eldest started school in September and prior to this we had wraparound care in nursery. We now use after school club, however this is committee led and we've just had an email saying it's at risk of closure due to not enough volunteers. If you don't use after school club how do families make it work? Do grandparents help 5 days a week? Honestly sick of this country not helping working parents 🫠 the irony of parents needing to be on the committee to keep it open when you're already busy working and juggling a million other school bits and pieces is hilarious to me also 😅 it's something I'd love to be part of but have no idea how if find time... Any and all advice welcome!

You and other parents need to be volunteering if you want it to stay open

No grandparents here just us two. I changed my hours so I’m off on a Monday and finish at 3 on two days of the week. I am very fortunate to be able to do this as I know this isn’t an option for some.

The other two days we use the wrap around at school or sports clubs at the school. Only issue was like yesterday with the snow the sports clubs were cancelled so mad panic trying to work out what to do.

Holidays I find more stressful or teacher training days. We have some clubs open for some holidays. We alternate some holidays between us. We have used a local teenager and let them look after the kids while we are in the house upstairs.

If you’re in a small village then that’s the issue surely, not the government. There aren’t enough people to provide the services you need like childminding and businesses (not voluntary) that do afterschool clubs. That’s why people live in suburban or urban areas with facilities that families need, even if it’s not their dream location. It’s lovely to bring your kids up in a village in some ways, but these are the compromises if you don’t have relatives or nannies etc to cover the childcare.

When I had my elder two it was tax credits help with child care, there was no universal funding! I worked weekends and exdh worked during the week for a year or so then I trained as a childminder so I got paid whilst looking after my own kids. With my youngest he went to nursery and the nursery do an after school club.

It is hard, especially in small schools. I also think small village schools often tend to have more of a ‘culture’ of the day ending at 330 or whenever as well. Ours has after school clubs but more there for the child’s interests than childcare. And no childminders.

Hybrid, so I can work from home, means less days to stress about wraparound care. I do drop off, DH pick up. Then its holiday clubs, childminder. Its hard, sometimes I just have to swap to work from home, one of our children has additional needs so not all childminders can assist, it gets expensive as the childminder that can take on needs is generally more expensive due to the specialist training bit.

As soon as the kids club opened their books for getting a place I was there arranging the sessions and also taking leave between us.
Planning ahead, working out the cost for the year and putting money by each month to cover so that when summer came I had the funds to pay for it.

We used breakfast club and after school club, plus grandparents one day a week until they started finding it too difficult (at age 77 and 82), plus I worked part time and did the school run on my days off.

I think you need to look differently at this opportunity. The time you put in at the monthly committee meeting plus a small hourly rate, you will get back tenfold, in local, low-cost, convenient childcare for 3-5 days per week every week.

How many posts on here from parents saying their child is exhausted at the end of the school day? Mine were with a childminder in a very homely environment when they were very little and used to go there and sleep until I picked them up at 5.30. When they were about 7 they moved to a private school which had lessons til 3.45 then aftercare. They managed but it wasn't as nice and they were more fractious once home. I do get the issue, but keeping very small children in a school like setting for an extra three hours every day for the parents' benefit is not prioritising their best interests. A huge increase in well trained and well paid / subsidised childminders would be the ideal answer.

We did plan 😅 should have mentioned in the original post that this is literally the only option for us, both our sets of parents still work, no childminders in the area, don't have the type of job you can just work whilst they're home.. I don't expect the government to pay for everything but there has to be some leeway when they need kids to grow up and keep the country going, I'll never understand people saying it's your problem 😅 if there's no kids who's going to pay for you when you're drawing your pension? All that is off subject anyway 😅

I'd want more information on this from the school. You're paying for a service, not getting it for free. Why should volunteers matter?

Do you live in a university town? We do and covering that gap of 2-3 hours is often a great job for a student, esp one who wants to go into primary school teaching. It's too small a window of time for a nanny.

Smug comments like this on these threads happen every single time. Ofc OP knew they'd need childcare around this time but she's struggling finding it and asking for advice. Bore off.

We ended up using private education because it was the only way to get them in School long enough so that we could work

This. GPs helped 2 days a week after school but basically DH and I worked opposite shifts and only had one week off together for family holidays until DC were old enough to be left alone. We also used a lot of single day annual leave to cover inset/school closure days.

It’s bloody hard!

This. Take control of it

join the committee and use your power to transform it into something more stable.

We used the school breakfast and after school clubs open from 7.30am - 6.30pm. Paid as part of the school fees.

What are they actually asking for?

Parent volunteers to actually be at after school club or parent volunteers to help the admin outside or the sessions?

If it's the admin/away from school stuff and as you desperately need the after school care so it seems likely you need to volunteer to keep it. Get involved and see what is required. You might be able to suggest different ways of working to make it more efficient where they could pay an admin a few hours a week or similar to lighten the load.

Join the committee and persuade two others who use the club to join as well. With three new joiners you'll lighten the load of the existing committee. Do it for a year while you look for another more flexible job. Miss a meeting or two if you need to (I think ours met twice a term and there wasn't actually that much to do in between).

I know you're saying you're time poor, but what are your options? This is the way.

So surely you realised at least one of you needed to change jobs?

Oh this is another option, my friend found an after school many via Koru Kids.

You'll pay more and have to employ them which is a lot of work in itself.

Same we live too far from any family for help. We paid a fortune to a child minder who did school pick up for us and kept DS until 5pm then she also had him in the school holidays in the days we couldn't. We were lucky that after lockdown neither of us had to go back to the office so we were then able to do the drop off and pick up. Unfortunately you sometimes just have to throw money at it if the help isn't there. My sons school didn't have any wrap around care at all.

We pay 3200 pounds a month for a mix of nursery, part-time nanny and Afty club 3 x a week. It’s completely unaffordable to be honest and not sustainable, but we’re self-employed with no family nearby.
We chose to have children, it’s a massive juggle, but it’s incredibly important to me to still have my career as I worked for years before having children, saved and self-funded both maternity leaves, and I try to get to as many school events I can. I work a lot of weekends.

Madness but fingers crossed it all settles down in time. We’re both in it. I’d not recommend having children unless the other parent is equally committed to juggling their work requirements to show up for them and share the load.