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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Mum asked to stop breastfeeding a TWO YEAR OLD in shoe shop.

464 replies

GinaDavva · 20/11/2025 11:30

Mixed feelings with this one. Shaming a mother publicly breastfeeding a small baby is never acceptable but breastfeeding a two year old child in a shop? Surely at that age a bottle is more convenient in the middle of a shop? My first thought was that this was more about attention than the actual principle of the matter. After breastfeeding 3 of my own I can honestly say there has never been a time where it felt necessary to start breastfeeding any of mine in the middle of a shop at two years old. Frankly at that age they wouldn’t find much in mine anyway!

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cj3z31jn7v1o

OP posts:
JinglingtoChristmas · 20/11/2025 12:26

newbluesofa · 20/11/2025 11:37

The way the shop owner spoke to her was disgusting

And ilegal.

usedtobeaylis · 20/11/2025 12:27

ChevernyRose · 20/11/2025 12:25

How weird to think feeding a child is the same as shitting

Someone actually did go with that equivalence?!

TaupeRaven · 20/11/2025 12:27

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You should probably do some reflection on why you are so disgusted about this, because if there's one thing on this thread that's not natural it's your wildly disproportionate reaction.

Outside9 · 20/11/2025 12:27

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ContinuewithGoogle · 20/11/2025 12:27

usedtobeaylis · 20/11/2025 12:22

Did you not read the article because you don't understand what you're reading? The point is relevant because you drew an equivalence between snacks when it was fuck all to do with snacks. Hope that helps.

If you insist on not understanding my point, maybe you just are not getting it. Ok then 😂

WhatAreYouDoingSundayBaby · 20/11/2025 12:27

God some of these comments are depressing.

WiggyWiggyImGettingJiggy · 20/11/2025 12:28

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:26

My dc (teenage) was invited to a friend's house at the week-end, lunch, etc. In the middle of lunching, his friend's mother whipped out her breast and started feeding a 3-year old at the time, as if it were normal. 'They are bloody crazy as a family' was my teen's verdict. I totally agreed.

Whipped out her breast, no less. Did she do it performatively as well?

Shame your poor teenager is going to grow up with the same shameful views as you.

ChevernyRose · 20/11/2025 12:28

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:22

Surely people aren’t thick enough to think that breastfeeding is just about food?! Why on earth wouldn’t you offer the most naturally comforting thing in the world to a distressed child?! Have we become that disassociated from the fact that we are mammals and that’s what we do? Is someone else’s prudish discomfort worth a small child crying, disrupting the shop and being distressed when it can quickly and easily be soothed? So weird.

Yes, there are some right weird prudes on this thread.

ClairN · 20/11/2025 12:28

scaredfriend · 20/11/2025 12:11

Two year olds don’t need to breastfeed in public (nor do they need bottles). Give the child a water bottle with a straw for sips of water if they’re thirsty. If they’re hungry, then take them for a meal / snack.
Of course, if they’re ill and need to feed for comfort then it’s different, but stay at home and look after them properly and don’t drag them around the shops.

I fed both DC to early toddler age (14 ish months I think). I never fed in public once they were well on the way to weaning, at around 6-8 months. It’s just not necessary.

They don’t need to breastfeed, but it provides comfort and connections, antibodies which boost their immune systems and target their specific infections, helps regulate their circadian rhythm, provides vitamins/fat/protein in whatever quantities they need, builds and boosts their gut microbiome, quenches thirst and hunger, reduces the mother’s cancer risks…

So why wouldn’t you do it, whilst child and mother want to, in case some judgemental busybody doesn’t like it?

MarvellousMonsters · 20/11/2025 12:28

“Surely at that age a bottle is more convenient in the middle of a shop?”

LOL. Tell me you haven’t breastfeed a two year old without telling me you haven’t breastfed a two year old. Also, when is expressing and bottle feeding EVER more convenient??

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:28

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:26

My dc (teenage) was invited to a friend's house at the week-end, lunch, etc. In the middle of lunching, his friend's mother whipped out her breast and started feeding a 3-year old at the time, as if it were normal. 'They are bloody crazy as a family' was my teen's verdict. I totally agreed.

Oh Hons - I’m glad I don’t live in your Victorian world where my son’s teenage friend is conditioned to be disgusted by me doing something completely normal whilst accepting my hospitality. Have fun up there on your high horse.

Yesimmoaningaboutbenefits · 20/11/2025 12:28

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:26

My dc (teenage) was invited to a friend's house at the week-end, lunch, etc. In the middle of lunching, his friend's mother whipped out her breast and started feeding a 3-year old at the time, as if it were normal. 'They are bloody crazy as a family' was my teen's verdict. I totally agreed.

I'd be embarrassed to admit to raising a teen like that.

Daaaaahling · 20/11/2025 12:29

It's impressive that some people manage to breastfeed for so long despite having internalized hatred and disgust for their own breasts' natural function. I'll give them that. Having breastfed oneself doesn't mean your views on the subject can't be loaded with misogyny.

Ps the evidence supports breastfeeding into toddlerhood as a protective factor against obesity lifelong. Probably the main reason to choose extended breastfeeding if it is an option for you.

Bananaandmangosmoothie · 20/11/2025 12:29

LadyWiddiothethird · 20/11/2025 12:22

I breastfed 3 children and never once felt the need to do it in public.Mothers that do it are attention seekers.

I can assure you that’s not the case.

babyno2duejuly2026 · 20/11/2025 12:29

This reply has been deleted

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WHY DO YOU CARE HOW OTHERS FEED THEIR CHILD….

Lavender14 · 20/11/2025 12:30

Motomum23 · 20/11/2025 11:31

I breastfed my 2 year old where ever was needed - regardless of your personal experience its not legal to ask a breastfeeding mother to stop.

This. All. Day. Long.

The fact this is even a discussion that needs to be had is sad. I breastfed mine until 2 and then weaned. If he was sick or hurt himself or was under the weather or extra clingy it was the easiest way to quickly soothe him. Mine has also always refused bottles (much to my disappointment because I really wanted him to be able to be bottle fed as well to give me more flexibility with childcare).

So to decide at 2 he should suddenly be handed a bottle which I'd need to go out and buy (never mind the pumping etc and equipment needed for that) would have made no sense whatsoever and been expensive.

Some children will also have a much harder time with weaning due to changes in their circumstances, trauma, autism etc and will be VERY attached to breastfeeding and I think it's great when mothers do their best to support their child with weaning at the time that best makes sense for THEIR CHILD rather than creating a rushed and distressing experience for the child.

I hope the shop owner gets exactly what is coming to them for breaking the law that's in place to protect children and breastfeeding mothers.

WHO recommendations are that breastfeeding is continued to at least the age of 2. The health benefits for child and particularly the health benefits for the mother are directly correlated to longer breastfeed (ie the longer you feed for the more benefit you get from it as a mother). And it's recommended for women like myself who had GD as longer term breastfeeding is linked to reduced likelihood of developing diabetes. After having GD you're 50% more likely to develop diabetes so I'll take that even if others choose to pearl clutch thanks.

The UK has one of the lowest rates of breastfeeding globally and really we should be doing all we can to support and empower women who breastfeed so that other women are able to feel its an option for them if they so choose and if they are able.

ClairN · 20/11/2025 12:30

WhatAreYouDoingSundayBaby · 20/11/2025 12:27

God some of these comments are depressing.

“Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.”
George Carlin

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:30

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:22

Surely people aren’t thick enough to think that breastfeeding is just about food?! Why on earth wouldn’t you offer the most naturally comforting thing in the world to a distressed child?! Have we become that disassociated from the fact that we are mammals and that’s what we do? Is someone else’s prudish discomfort worth a small child crying, disrupting the shop and being distressed when it can quickly and easily be soothed? So weird.

My mammals (cats and dogs) always breastfed their pups in the privacy of their own space.

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:30

Pinkandpurple225533 · 20/11/2025 12:26

Genuinely interested to know how you managed this. What did you do when you were out and about for more than an hour? You said no public spaces so no cafes, shops, toddler groups, parks? Literally only inside private houses? What did you do if you were out and baby was crying and hungry?

Edited

Presumably Gina forded the fuck out of those kids 🫣

ChevernyRose · 20/11/2025 12:30

This reply has been deleted

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It's perverted to describe breastfeeding as a fetish.

TheignT · 20/11/2025 12:31

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:24

They wouldn’t be universally slaughtered. As a mother of kids between 7-19 and a therapist I find it utterly tragic that being “civilised” entails ignoring distress from a tiny child in case other people are offended or find it performative. It is a good thing as evidenced by all psychological literature available which is really what we should be measuring it against- rather than pearl clutching mumsnetters.

When I was expecting first baby many moons ago my GP was Indian. He asked if I was planning to breastfeed and I said I hoped to be able to. He said it always puzzled him that that was what British women always said, he said in India the assumption was you would and if you couldn't that would be dealt with when the time came.

He also found it odd that breasts were on show in the Sun, yes it was long ago, but the idea of a woman feeding her baby as nature intended seemed so horrifying to so many people.

I guess moving continents can be confusing.

Shakeyourwammyfannyfunkysong · 20/11/2025 12:31

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:26

My dc (teenage) was invited to a friend's house at the week-end, lunch, etc. In the middle of lunching, his friend's mother whipped out her breast and started feeding a 3-year old at the time, as if it were normal. 'They are bloody crazy as a family' was my teen's verdict. I totally agreed.

I hope your dc's friend is aware of how arrogant and judgemental your teenager is and has the opportunity to befriend someone who doesn't judge her entire family based on a 3 year old being fed lovingly and appropriately.

Calliopespa · 20/11/2025 12:31

Redwaterr · 20/11/2025 11:55

What is actually so wrong about feeding your child in public? Its just a boob.

I didn't even breastfeed mine and I still think it's insane that boobs aren't allowed to be used for the sole purpose they're created for.

Edited

I agree that breastfeeding in public is fine but I'm not sure about your reasoning.

We have plenty of body parts designed to do things that I don't think are acceptable in public.

Anonymous07200408 · 20/11/2025 12:31

Hons123 · 20/11/2025 12:30

My mammals (cats and dogs) always breastfed their pups in the privacy of their own space.

🤣🤣🤣

LizzieSiddal · 20/11/2025 12:32

fromcitytocountry · 20/11/2025 12:00

A two year is eating solid food and likely 3 meals a day. There is absolutely zero reason for them to breastfeed in a shop, and likely it was due to to comfort over a necessity for nutrients. Let's be honest there is a time and a place, and a two year is not going to starve if not immediately breastfed in a shop. They could waited and gone somewhere more private.

Just to state....yes I would say the circumstances and viewpoint would be different if this was a baby who was fully reliant on being breastfed.

How do you know what had happened before the feed. Maybe the toddler was very upset about something? That is just one reason why it would be a good thing to do in the shoe shop.
I fed both of mine and barely went out 30 years ago because of dreadful public attitudes. My Dd BF her Dd until she was 3 and she did it where ever she wanted it. I was very proud of her.

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