How do you stop yourself wanting all the things?

[Gettingabitnippynow]

I’m not a materialist person at all, but have just been to pick up a few Christmas bits for Dd and I just want all the things. They’re not particularly expensive, but would be to buy them all. Christmas candles, Christmas mugs, pjs, teddies, wooly hats, jumpers etc etc. Do you all buy all these things or just ignore? I realise it’s a bit silly to buy new every year and a waste when I have last years xmas mugs and pjs.
Just wish I was wealthy sometimes!

I disagree! My new Christmas-food pyjamas from Marks make me feel cheerful, and I will wear them all winter! And keep them for years. My record is twenty years for a full set of pyjamas, until the elastic in the bottoms gave up, but I still have the top! Twenty-five years and still going!

No urge at all. I've had far more than a skinful of crap. I see it all as clutter that I'll later have to tidy up or clean.

I have a much harder time finding anything actually worth buying.

I have a real aversion to cheap Christmas tat.

Exactly. I've had to do that. 20+ duvet covers. Lovely, good quality ones. All went to charity shops. Lovely jewellery, some of which I've kept. And never worn. Very good quality clothes. A coat I'd have loved but too small.

Stuff. Stuff. Stuff. Barely used.

the “things” are pretty. awful though - glittery , cheap and will end up in landfill.
Think about how much people people making them are paid
i decorate with things from garden - so tbste branches in vase and hand baubles, pinecones , lots candles and a few fairy lights.
If you have pinterest search natural decorations
much cheaper and better quality. and also. bringing some nature in better for soul
I am not a luddite , have a bit glitter bit mixed with other things

I want all the things too, OP.

Not necessarily the christmas stuff, though there are lots of christmas bits I'd like, but just every time I go shopping I see bits I'd like whether it's new books, homewares, clothes, etc. and I have to stop myself buying ALL the things, but I can't afford it. Not without using a credit card. And me and DH already owe quite a bit, so we're trying hard not to add to it and spend within our means. I don't find it easy.

The thought of finding space for the extra Christmas crap I may have bought is enough to stop me.

My dear DM, loves passing on all manner of crap onto to us, Christmas and otherwise and we have more than enough crap so I try exceptionally hard not to buy anymore crap to add to it.

Only by visualising the car im savings up for. I literally picked up armfuls if Christmas loveliness in TK Maxx, stopped, thought very hard about a Fiat Panda hybrid and put it all back. I was amazed. I have never in my life exhibited any shopping self control.

You're falling for all the commercialism. Big, bold Christmassy displays, festive music, new lines, pretty Christmassy things that they make you believe you must have. I get taken in with it too but try to stay strong!

Work out what you can afford - then spend that 👍

Yes! The duvet covers! I thought I had a lot of them (we've got 4 or 5), but she had a whole wardrobe full of them. Plus sheets, towels, tablecloths, some of them still in their packets. Clothes and shoes and bags and... It was all lovely stuff too! Plus ornaments, decorations, so many trinkets and collectibles she didn't have the space for, so they were just packed away in boxes. And the jewellery! My DM had hers, her DM's AND her MIL's! It's all in my shed and I don't know what the heck to do with it, thinking about it makes me anxious.

It was an awful thing to have to do in general but after eight billion trips to the charity shop and, in some cases, the dump, I vowed my DC wouldn't have to do the same when I go! So, no more buying stuff just because.

Luckily I just don’t have that gene to want to accumulate. I have a sister who gets her self caught up with all the latest must haves - jellycays, Stanley’s, labubus etc. I just have no interest in any of that at all.

I get it OP, I love 'stuff' too. I love pretty trinkets and candles and cushions and nice shoes and earrings, and I love the treasure hunt of finding something lovely in the shops (or online, to be fair). I could easily become a hoarder, it's something I battle against.

My top tip is to take a screenshot and save it on my phone - if I never think of it again I didn't really want it. And also, something I heard recently - think of everything as future landfill. Eventually almost everything will break, or you'll go off it - do you really want to end up chucking it out?

Admittedly I don't like cheap tat (thankfully) - I can't stand places like B&M where everything will only last five minutes. I love finding my old favourite Christmas decorations... but the problem is that I would like to add to them every year. I usually allow myself one or two things. It is hard though.

ETA - I think there is a genetic aspect to it. I've always thought I'd have made an excellent gatherer 😂I would know where all the best berries were.

I have had the same Christmas mug for 40 years since I received it as a gift when I was a child. I have two pairs of Christmas pyjamas, both are over five years old. I don’t feel the need to replace stuff that’s not worn out.

Do "one in, one out"

So sell and get rid of things BEFORE you buy new. That way you don't accumulate clutter, and if you can't sell you can't buy.

Don't add to a pile, replace.

What exactly are you planning on doing with a Christmas cushion from January?

This is fantastic advice. The buying is nearly always for the dopamine hit.

I get it, it can seem tedious and boring to have the same old decorations and mugs year in year out and want a bit of a re-fresh. What we do instead is go to the Range or the garden centre and buy one new tree decoration a year. That way it’s special and creates a collection that can be handed down, and we also get the dopamine of buying something new for Christmas.

Instead of buying stuff, could you buy baking mixes/ingredient? Some air dry clay and acrylic paints? Some Christmas themed diamond paintings? That way you get to spend special time together, and then next year when you get the decorations you made out, they’ll feel more special than something mass produced that you just bought in a shop.

THIS !

I re-use until it is broken! Then, I may replace it if needed, or not if I don't.

For the past 2 years my kids and their cousins have all had matching Xmas PJs and the photos (of them) for my parents are nice but justifying the cost of those was hard for me !
The younger 4 grew, so re-using them was not an option either !

I guess different people prioritise spending on different stuff too don't they?

Its a shame we live in such a throwaway world. When my mum was a little girl she was given a China cup at Easter with a little chocolate egg in it. It was the only one she ever got so was really special to her. She died last year and the little mug has pride of place in my home, 90+ years after she received it. I am not suggesting that everything has to last that long, but wouldn't it be nicer if every year we take out our dcs special Christmas mug, or stocking, or cushion or whatever, and make a bit of a special event of it, and put them away again carefully afterwards, instead of buying more and more shit to send to landfill.

If you are keeping PJs for twenty years you are clearly not buying a new pair each year, unless of course you have 25 pairs if PJs which would be rather excessive!

I buy a couple of new things each year, I try to enjoy the ambience in shops and see the opulence as a seasonal thing for the shops rather than my home. If you bought everything you’d be drowning in clutter come January! 😄

I have three Christmas jumpers…….each one is in great condition and I’ve had them several years. They’re laundered carefully and put away for the following year so no need to buy more! Who needs a Christmas mug anyway? And just what is the point of Christmas pj’s, other than another marketing ploy to get us to spend our hard earned cash, or in some cases, the pittance of a pension that the DWP deem it possible to live on!
As for Christmas candles……….get a simply candle, stand it on a nice holder, decorate the base with some holly, pine cones etc - other decorations are available and Voila! Christmas candle!

I have the exact opposite reaction, in that shops full of stuff, especially seasonal stuff, make me feel like everything is all just hollow and empty, and think about the meaningless void of purpose in modern life. Not to be dramatic but if I bought that stuff it would just sit in my house and my life would carry on exactly as it would before. It genuinely gives me existential anxiety and dread.

I just think "those things are for people with lots of storage space and we don't have much storage space in our average sized townhouse" and walk on.

I just buy it anyway 😬 I wish I had more self restraint but if I like it (and can afford it) I’ll buy it.

Sometimes if you buy one thing you adore, worked out by process of elimination- actually I wouldn’t really use that, that isn’t that nice up close etc etc, it scratches the itch! I’m materialistic at the mo and I don’t care- fed up of having the very bare minimum, never spending money etc!